Restoration: Book 2/3

Chapter 4

-Hinata's POV-

Days passed in a dull blur of four white walls. I don't know what I expected, but it wasn't to be left in this room twenty-four hours a day. No books or magazines were provided to occupy my mind during the day, and whatever medicine they were feeding me in the mornings made it impossible to have any dreams at night.

It was like someone had used a "soften" filter on my senses. Anything they fed me tasted like sand. No conversations with the therapist visiting me every few days held my interest. It felt like my mind was slowly eating itself away.

After two weeks, I stopped trying to get information from the few people coming to my room, and I gave up trying to convince anyone that I wasn't insane. It didn't matter if I was or not. They were going to find some reason to keep me here in this drug-induced haze one way or another.

I sat on the edge of my bed, bare feet on the ground and hands on my lap as my vision dazed out on the blank wall across from me. Dissociating was the only thing I could do anymore, and I've gotten quite good at it. I could go for hours without moving.

When I first came here, I tried to do small exercises like pushups and situps to maintain my physical strength, but I was scolded every time and had no choice but to stop trying. The camera in the corner of the room showed the nurses and doctors each second of every day.

So, I was left to zone out and get lost in my thoughts. Hanabi was a popular topic my mind dwelled on. I couldn't get anyone to confirm they knew I had a sister, much less have them find out if her whereabouts were known. For all I know, she and Masumi could've bought plane tickets and left the country to flee the police. My poor sister...Her future's undoubtedly been affected by all this, and she didn't even know something terrible was happening in her house.

Besides Hanabi, my mind traveled to Naruto and my other friends, Neji included. After waking up and realizing I'd been separated from everyone else, it became hard to convince myself I'd ever see them again. So I eagerly looked forward to seeing Naruto in my dreams like I had those last few weeks of The Program. Loe and behold, though, the sedatives they keep feeding me prevent me from dreaming, so I can't even desperately clutch to that.

If I'd known that was the last time I would see everyone, I would've done anything to let them know how much I appreciate them. I would've hugged the girls and even some of the boys. I would've somehow overcome my anxiety and kissed Naruto at least once to say I did it.

If I'd known Neji was my brother from week one, I would've realized how much I don't hate the idea of us being family. Now that I've had weeks to think about his confession, I've come to that conclusion, but it's too late to let him know that I'd love to learn more about him and his life so we can truly become siblings.

The tears didn't stop for almost the entirety of my first week here, but when they finally did, they never started back up again. In the furthest crevice of my mind, I realized something was happening outside my room, but I was in too deep a haze to bother addressing the fact and allowed myself to stay unbothered. Hours passed as I ignored the commotion before falling asleep at the same time as I do every day.

Come morning, I awoke, showered, brushed my teeth and hair, and then waited for a nurse to arrive with my breakfast and daily medication. Only after hours had passed did I finally snap out of it and realize no one had come.

My limbs felt weak and heavy as I trudged to the door and peered out of the small square window. I should've been scared. I should've been downright terrified at what I saw, but the emotion barely even registered as I stared at the corpse of a nurse lying on her back on the floor outside with a massive puddle of blood around her body. Instead, I slowly turned the handle on my door to verify if it was still locked.