Jaxon

Drop

     Jap couldn't help but smile when Twitch had finally given him enough trust to take a toy from his hands. This was a big step in his opinion. Twitch was terrified of everything, well... almost everything. He seemed to be ok with Ardent. They yapped back and forth a lot. Was it possible Ardent was trying to calm him down?

     Jap got back up after giving Twitch a small pat on the head and went to the kitchen to get their food started for an early lunch. He made a sandwich for himself and a small bowl of fruit and nuts for Ardent. The vet had said that since Twitch was so malnourished that it wasn't smart to give him anything solid. So he got together the supplement mix in a bottle and a small bowl of plain oatmeal.

     "Who's hungry?" He said cheerfully. He must have said it a bit too loud, or too quickly. Twitch nearly jumped out of his skin and tightened his grip on the bear in his hands. Jap sighed and walked over to the couch. He put the small bowl of food in Ardent's lap and hoped that it stayed there while he ate. "Twitch... Here boy." He held out the small bowl of oatmeal and hoped that Twitch would come on his own. If he didn't have to fight him to feed him the bottle, that would be amazing.

     Ardent carefully picked up his bowl and tried to hold it in one hand while he ate with the other. Twitch stayed frozen where Jap had left him. Jap sighed as he got up and got a little closer to Twitch. "Come on. Food. You like food." He tried to coax him.

     "Food good." Ardent said with his mouthful behind him.

     Jap could help but laugh at him. He was so adorable. He wished Twitch wasn't so scared, he'd love to teach him some words. He wondered if Twitch would be able to learn words. Hace had said that only super smart Inchoates could talk. Was Twitch as smart as Ardent? Could he learn as quickly?

     Twitch leaned forward slightly and tried to look in the bowl Jap was holding out. Jap tried to hold still, but a sound behind him made him turn to look back at Ardent. He had a slightly shocked look on his face and his bowl of food was on the couch upside down. Jap gave a sigh and set down the bowl of oatmeal.

     "You ok buddy?" He picked up the food and looked at Ardent. He looked like he was going to cry. "No, no, no! Please don't cry. It was just an accident. Look! The food is ok."

     "Food?" Ardent sniffed. He looked slightly terrified.

     "Yeah, here you go buddy." He took Ardent's hands and put the food back in it. Ardent looked down at the food in the bowl then at the piece in his hand. He looked back at Jap and sniffed a few times. "See? It's ok to eat."

     "Food..." Ardent said a bit sad. He didn't look as terrified anymore, but he did look disappointed in himself. "Food... ok?" He held up the piece to Jap and sighed.

     Jap couldn't help but laugh. Ardent must have thought the food was no good now that it fell on the couch. 'I mean, it's not like the couch is dirty.' Jap thought. He took the food from Ardent and smiled. He put it up to Ardent's mouth. He ate the piece, then turn his attention back to the rest in the bowl.

     "Alright... crisis averted." Jap said under his breath. He turned around and his smile quickly dropped. Twitch had picked up the bowl of oatmeal and had disappeared with it. Jap hated the thought that it was now smeared all over his carpet under his bed. He sighed and ran his hand down his face. How was it so hard to take care of just two Inchoates?

     "Twitch?" He called out slowly. "Where are you buddy?" A small sound came from the kitchen. Jap slowly walked up to the small island and looked over the counter.

     On the floor, sitting cross-legged with his lap serving as a table, was Twitch. He was slowly eating the bowl of oatmeal that Jap had made for him. Jap leaned on the counter and watched the little guy slowly eat the few bites of food he'd put in the bowl. He seemed to be very careful not to get any food on the floor or his clothes. The longer that Jap watched though, the more his heart slightly started to break. The poor thing kept looking around every time he went to take a bite, like he was scared someone, or something, was going to come and take the food from him.

     Once the bowl was empty, Twitch got up and walked the bowl over to the sink. Jap watched as he tried to reach the sink. He stood up on his tippy toes and tried to push the bowl over the ledge. Jap sighed as he took the bowl from Twitch and put it in the sink the rest of the way. Twitch gave a startled squeak and dropped to his butt.

     "It's ok. I'm just helping you." Jap said slowly with a smile. Now he just had to feed him his bottle.

     Jaxon heard Ryan squeak and wondered what was going on. He wanted to try and look into the kitchen, but he didn't want to risk dropping his food again. He nearly cried at the thought that all that food Jap had given him was going to be wasted, thrown away because of his clumsiness. He really did try to catch the bowl as it started to roll off his lap. He was much more careful now and held it tighter.

     Growing up, if you dropped your food, it was taken away from you. They would yell at you, and then make you watch as they threw all the food into the recycler. Jaxon had had several nights that he'd gone to sleep hungry. He had seen others lose their meals... but almost all of those children had been cut from the program. And yet... he never was. Why wasn't he? He wasn't anywhere near the size they wanted him to be. They had made that clear several times, and just looking at the other boys proved that as well.

     'Why wasn't I cut from the program?' Jaxon had found himself thinking. This wasn't the first time. He often wondered this, especially when his CO allowed all the beatings and the strange way he acted when Jaxon was promoted to Lead Scientist. He thought back to the little bit of that dream he could remember. Was it a dream? It seemed very real. And his dreams seemed to be getting more detailed. He just wished he could remember more of them.

     'If that dream was real... was the nightmare I had about the cage real too?' Jaxon suddenly was lost in his mind. 'When was I in a cage? WHY was I in a cage?'

     Jap had taken the bowl from Ryan and scared him in the prosses. He didn't mean to yelp like that. He just didn't know Jap was there and he was worried that the bowl was going to fall out of his hands. He tried his hardest to keep the apartment as clean as his owner had it. He didn't want to bring down his wrath. Although... he hadn't seen Jap mad yet. But it was only a matter of time.

     Ryan hadn't let Jap feed him the bottle, he hated when Jap held him that time and fed him. Jap sighed and looked disappointed, but he still didn't do anything violent. Instead, he held out the bottle and tried to get him to take if from him. Ryan took the bottle and slowly backed away from Jap. He went back into where Jaxon was sitting and pulled himself up on the couch and sat close to him. Jaxon was his friend, his first and only friend.

     Growing up, he wasn't allowed to leave the house often. It got worse when his mother suddenly disappeared after he turned twelve. His father never told him where she went, but he knew that she was dead. He could feel it. She was the only one in the house that feed him regular meals.

     After she was gone, everything went from bad... to worse, and that damn basement was his entire world. He was allowed to go into the fenced in yard once a year, that's how he knew what year it was at least.

     "Are you ok?" Jaxon asked, breaking Ryan's thoughts.

     Ryan gave a faint smile; slightly glad he'd brought him out of the past.

     "I think so." Ryan sighed. "Just over thinking."

     "You too huh?" Jaxon gave a matching sigh.

     "I didn't have the best past. These three days have been almost... unreal."

     "It's been weird, that's for sure." Jaxon laughed.

     There was a moment of silence between them before Jap came back into the room and sat down next to them. Ryan moved to the other side of Jaxon and watched Jap for a moment.

     "Does yours leave you alone all day too?" Ryan asked.

     "No. This is the first time he's left me somewhere." Jaxon gulped and had strange thoughts pass his mind. 'What if he left me here? Did he think Jap would do a better job taking care of me? Why hasn't he come back for me yet? What is he doing that's more important than being home?'