Parallax (Suicidal Vigilante Deku)

Revelation

When I woke up, I felt really exhausted and tired but I could hear someone snorring and that allured me enough to actually sit up and have a look around. Normally I would say I am alone in my room or dead by how I was feeling but it wasn't as if I couldn't remember what happened at all. I knew exactly that I nearly died by my own mothers hand.

Once I sat up, I came to see Mic on the chair snorring and right next to me there was Eraserhead sleeping in his sleeping bag. It didn't surprise me to see him since he saved me but that Cockatoo was a new one.

Me (whispering): Thank you for saving me.

I didn't know if I would have the courage later to tell them that too when they were awake or not but I felt as if that was needed.

Thanks for saving me so much.

I can't believe you were there...

I would have died if not for you.

Thanks for being there Eraserhead.

I don't know what you were doing and I don't care but thanks soo much!

While I started to remember what happened, tears started falling down my cheek and I started sobbing quietly or so I thought until someone hugged me which made me look up from the spot I focused up until now.

Eraserhead: It's over now problem child.

Me: *sob* thank you..*sob*

Eraserhead: You will no longer be in danger. Now relax and let it go.

The more he said that the more I started crying. It was as a dam had broken down and all the sadness and the tears I had. Never did I cry this much before. Occasionally I would cry but I was desperate and I was crying soo much right now that it felt actually good and relieving.

Mic: Ufff.. that was some good sleep.

While Eraserhead sat right on the side of the bed and started to rub circles on my back, this cockatoo just woke up and looked at us.

Me: Pfff-

His reaction was quite funny to me and so even tho I was crying, I couldn't help it but laugh at him. This was definitelly funny. He stretched nealy like a cat but slept like a log and only now saw us and had this confused look in his face too.

Mic: Did I... did I interrupt something?

Eraserhead: No. You are just being you.

Mic: *puh* good. I thought something was going on... wait you are awake little listener!

Me: Yeah.. thanks for saving me.

It took a bit more courage to actually say it again since it really felt like a miracle to me and it was something I was glad. Never was I soo glad before.

Mic: I'll get the doctor now.

Eraserhead: NO.

Mic: Sho, what you mean no?

Eraserhead: Call RG over.

Mic: Ohhh... good one. I'll do that.

Just like that Mic left the room and left us two alone. It was honestly feeling a bit weird not being alone and suffer. This was the first time someone actually cared this much. Now I understood the feeling I had when the people of this district helped me. 

Eraserhead: Are you okay?

Me: Mh.

Eraserhead: Kid, tell me what happened.

Me: You saw it.

Eraserhead: Tell me problem child.

Me: My mother... she got drunk... again.

Eraserhead: How long?

Me: Too long.

Eraserhead: How much?

Me: I can't tell ya... I don't know the answer myself.

Eraserhead: Are you... *sigh* problem child... what am I to do about you?

He looked at me and hugged me tightly. It hurt a bit but I stood still. The thing about him was that it felt actually nice. This embrace I got, the warmth, someones genious care and the worry I saw in his eyes were true and not played. 

Back then I didn't get the pharmacists meaning of his expression but now I did. This hero right in front of me had the same expression and it was worrying me for a bit. 

Was it really that unrealistic what I went through?

Was it not normal?

Was I dumb to endure this?

Should I have said anything?

Questions over questions started popping in my mind. The thing about this was that even though I had a lot of questions there was really no answeres I could wrapp my mind around it. I wished there was something I could have said or done but no. 

I didn't know it better.

This was how I was treated my whole life. 

I always believed that this was right.

How could I be soo wrong?

The more I started thinking about it, the more I started thinking about how unfair the treatment I got. Never did I really questioned it ever again after accpeting it but now... I was older and wiser than when I was a kid and it was then that I gave up. 

How could I believe the words people told me?

How could I be so dumb?

I am a human not a beast!

I might be quirkless but does this mean I am so different?

I breathe!

I see!

And I think!

How the hell am I even thinking?

Why did I even start thinking like that?

It doesn't make any sense!

I was soo dumb!

I was just an inoccent child!

I did nothing wrong!

Thankfully Eraserhead was holding me otherwise I might have broken down into a mental breakdown. It was now that I really started questioning myself. There was soo much I accpeted in my life without thinking about it but for some reaosns I started thinking about my life now.

The axe and the near death I just experiences opened up my own eyes. I realized that as much as I wanted to die and escape life, I never wanted to leave being Parallax. It meant soo much too me and it felt as if a cutain was actually opened and I could see life and myself clear for the first time ever.

I refuse to die!

I never wanted this!

How stupid could I be thinking that death was a solution?

It wasn't a solution at all.

It's soo stupid!

If I died then it would be over!

What about all the people I saved?

What about the people that rely on me?

What about my feelings?!

I am just glad I really didn't die... I would have regretted it badly for sure.

This will be a new beginning for me and I will make sure to be a lot better than before!