Octonauts QnA+Dares

The Dreaded Interview

"Captain, can I ask the readers something?" Pinto asked in the sweetest tone he could. After the kids had been reassured that Inkling was not going to play them opera music, all of them had decided to return, although they did put a little more distance between themselves and Inkling than normal.

"Of course, my darling boy." The Captain smiled, humoring Pinto, "What would you like to ask, sweetest?"

"Who should we torture next?" Pinto answered happily, bouncing up and down in his seat.

"Alright then!" The Captain laughed and typed in the question, not expecting a response, but to his shock, the instant the question popped up on the tablet, and answer began to form itself out of the pixelated black print.

"From @The_RaidyAva, Hmmmmmmm, I'm thinking JANE."

"Ooooooh, Saumensch." Pinto exclaimed delightedly and elbowed Jane in the robs as she gave him a withering look. Jane opened her mouth to tell him off, but before she could, Dashi immediately caught on to what her sister was going to do and gave her a warning look. Jane scowled and looked back to the Captain and nodded to him to continue.

"OK Jane, here's ur questions: What's ur BIGGEST fear?"

"Dolls. Definitely dolls and animatronics. It's just... their eyes are completely soulless, animatronics look horrifying, and I can't trust dolls not to kill me gruesomely the second I turn my back." Jane responded.

"I don't blame you; those things are terrifying." Tweak shuddered.

"Who's ur fav sister?"

"Dashi." Jane answered at once, "No doubt Dashi."

"What a surprise..." Koshi muttered sarcastically as the Captain passed her the tablet, " I hate you too."

"Aww," Jane teased back, "Don't get jealous, Pendeja, I hate you more than anything!" Koshi winked at her little sister and began to read the next question.

"Did u know that in another universe I'm dancing with joy with all the delicious kelp cakes??? cos I am."

"Oh yeah, I know." Jane answered casually while staring down the wall, "Koshi, Squirt, and I helped make them, "Sorry about all your candy by the way."

"Hey!" Pinto cried indignantly, "I helped too!"

"You ate like 70% of the batter!" Squirt interjected.

Pinto gasped in mock scandalization. "I did not!"

Jane gasped too, mocking him, "Yes you did!"

"OK fine, I did!" Pinto crossed his arms, pretending to be grumpy, "Oh, cabron, continue."

"Saukerl." Jane muttered in disgust, but turned back to Koshi, who read the next question.

"How old r u? 11?"

"Nine" Jane corrected.

"What do u think of Pinto and Koshi?"

Jane's eyes glimmered with a spark of mischief, "I think Pinto is an absolute disgusting, idiotic, little saukerl 50% of the time and the funnest, sweetest, most hilarious person to be around the other 50% of the time, so basically, I think of him as the little brother I've always wanted. I've hated Koshi since the day I came home from the hospital according to Dashi, and she can be so, so, SO annoying and bossy sometimes, but I do love her sometimes, like when she lets me sleep in her bed at night after I've seen a horror movie and don't want to sleep alone."

"Aww! That's sweet!" Dashi laughed and coaxed the tablet out of Koshi's paws, "Do u have a phone?"

"No, but Dashi says I can get one once I'm 13." Jane squirmed impatiently, "Are we almost done yet?"

Dashi perused her tablet, "Only two more questions, baby sis, hang in there. How often do u bathe? Cos the sea water is filled with fish poop and pets in my street bathe once a month and they stink."

"The pets in their neighborhood sound like Kwazii." Tweak piped up and everyone carefully hid their faces to hide the fact that they were laughing.

"OI!" Kwazii screeched and lunged at Tweak as the Captain quickly grabbed him and pulled him down hard enough that he face planted into the carpet, which only made everyone laugh harder.

"OK." Jane choked out once she stopped laughing enough to speak, "I bathe whenever the frick Dashi makes me, so about once every day or once every other day. Oh, and every time either Koshi or I go out into the water, Dashi makes us bathe afterwards, so that's probably why."

"And she hates it. So much." Koshi chimed in, "Dashi has to stand outside the door of the bathroom to get her to stay in there for more than one minute."

"Shut up." Jane muttered, throwing a cushion at Koshi's head.

"Last question!" Dashi exclaimed, ignoring her sisters' antics"Also, what's your favorite hobby?"

"I like to draw." Now Jane really seemed like she wanted to get this out of the way, "Especially cartoons and stuff."

"And, that's all!" Dashi sighed, sounding relieved.

"Finally!" Jane laughed, "Oh, can I ask them a question now too?"

"What is it?" Dashi sounded hesitant.

"Does anyone have anything to torture Pinto?"

"Hey!" Pinto cried indignantly.