Never Gonna Happen

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"Alright then, time for the net dare." The Captain was beaming. "Dashi? Would you read it for us please?"

"Alright." Dashi took the tablet from the Captain and scrolled through the list of questions from some of the most wonderful, talented people on Wattpad before her eyes fell on one she couldn't skip. She cleared her throat. Everyone needed to hear this one.

"From DolphinGirl123456," Dashi read, "I dare Kwazii and Tweak to be nice to each other for a whole day." Everyone grew silent and their eyes fell on the pair bickering in the corner, but who stopped abruptly at the sound of the dare.

"I'd like to see that happen." Squirt had voiced everyone else's exact thoughts at the moment. Everyone sat awkwardly in the Game Pod waiting for someone to do something. Anything. Before Tweak finally offered.

"Anyone wanna play Mario Kart with me?" Everyone stood up, only too glad to take her offer.

"I'll kick your fuzzy little tail, matey!" Kwazii teased.

"Not before I rip yours off and shove it into that stupid mouth of yours, saukerl!" Tweak retorted and everyone groaned. Dashi leaned over to her little sisters.

"How long did they last?"

"A minute." Koshi checked her watch.

"But they still beat their previous record." Jane added.
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"Since that... didn't go the way we planned." The Captain chose his words carefully, mulling them over in him mouth before letting them spill out, "Let's do another! Inkling?"

The professor cleared his throat. "From @doggo_booknerd, I dare Captain Barnacles to wrap 50 presents in under a day." The Captain spit out the coffee he had jut taken a sip of, but quickly, to the best of his ability, composed himself.

"50!?" He asked incredulously. Professor Inkling double checked the paper.

"Apologies, Captain." He adjusted his monocle, "It seems I've misread it. 50 presents in under an hour." The Captain, if anyone could've been able to tell, paled.

"An hour?!" He thundered, but immediately stopped himself, "Yes, yes, wonderful way to push my abilities." He hastily amended and trudged out of the room in shock.

"Next dare!" Kwazii rubbed his paws together enthusiastically, ready to see what other member of his crew would have to be tortured. The poor naive pirate cat.
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"Tweak, your turn, matey!" Kwazii thumped his grumpy rabbit friend on the back and scurried away as she aimed a blow at him.

"From @RainbelisaAwesome, I dare Kwazii to tell his family history." Kwazii stiffened but sighed and stood up, ready for a speech.

"As you all know, my grandad, Calico Jack is a pirate, but me family wasn't all pirates. Me grandad ran away from home at 18 to be a pirate, like his grandad."

"And you?" Peso asked hesitantly.

" Me mamie grew up on the seas with me grandad, but me dad wasn't always on board with the pirate life, tried to stamp it out of me, said I didn't need it." The Vegimals' eyes grew softer and sadder, and ran up to him, wrapped their arms around his knees, climbed onto him and snuggled into his chest and chattered sadly.

"Oh, they're saying, 'But we need Kwazii to be a pirate and chase the monsters away.'" For once, Shellington wasn't going to mention how monsters weren't real.

"That's true." Peso smiled and rubbed Kwazii's shoulder comfortingly. The hint of a smile made its way onto Kwazii's face, and he hugged all his mateys back.

"Thanks, mateys! Now let's go and see how the Captain's doing!"

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