summer child // joshler

6

josh's point of view

the ride to the party consists of tyler humming along to the radio and drumming his fingers on the steering wheel.

i feel awkward and anxious, unsure of how this will go. i think it's going to suck following tyler around. i know that it might not be the healthiest coping mechanism, but it is one nonetheless, and who am i to tell him no? i'm almost positive he would've gone alone if i'd said no anyway.

we didn't tell our mothers where we were going. they didn't ask.

we arrive at a house ten minutes across town and park on the street. tyler takes the keys out of the ignition and hands them to me.

"let's go, bud," he flashes me a quick smile and we get out of the car.

the house is huge, easily two or three times the size of mine or tyler's. the music is loud when we walk in and tyler leads me straight to the kitchen. he seems to have obviously been here before and as he's pouring himself a cup of something i don't know the name of, it dawns on me that im not even sure whose house this is.

he downs most of the cup in one go before pouring another.

this is probably going to be a long night.

-

two hours after our arrival, tyler has only left me alone once, to use the restroom. he played a game of beer pong after. i learned quickly that he is very bad at the game.

i've kept to myself the whole time, observing quietly. no one has tried to talk to me, which is nice.

when i see tyler stumble back into the kitchen from his second trip to the bathroom, i wince when he almost falls flat on his face.

"alright, man, come on. time to go," i step forward and he slings a heavy arm around my shoulder.

"heyyyy, josh! 's cool, i was ready to go anyway," he slurs, leaning on me as we make our way outside.

when we make it halfway through the front yard, tyler stops.

"one sec," he holds up one finger, turns around, and immediately vomits all over the grass at his feet.

"oh my god," i hold one hand up to cover my mouth and then notice tyler wobbling like he's about to fall over again, so i quickly go to help him stand back up.

"hey, josh! when did you get here?" he laughs a little and i sigh.

"been here all night, ty. let's get in the car, come on," i lead him to the car and help him in, making sure he puts his seatbelt on before closing the door for him and then running around to the drivers side.

i drive us home, listening this time to tyler's drunk mumbling instead of music. i'm not sure what he's really talking about, but i nod any time he looks to me for a response.

when we get to my house, i have to help tyler out of the car and to my room. luckily, my mom is asleep already and not here to question us.

i close the door and take my shoes off, watching tyler take his own shoes off and climb into my bed. he's staring at my ceiling, a small smile on his face.

i get into bed next to him, trying my best to ignore the way tyler absolutely reeks. alcohol is gross in itself, but the faint smell of vomit lingers on him too.

"dude, what if i got a pet fish," he proposes.

"no."

"why not? i could name him aladdin."

"why would you name a fish aladdin?" i laugh a little and turn my head to look at him.

"cause the fishbowl is kinda like the genie lamp, which isn't even a lamp," he tells me this as if its obvious.

"then shouldn't the fish be called genie?"

"you're so smart!" he turns to look at me with wide eyes and a lopsided smile.

"shut up. turn over and get some sleep," i cant help the smile that remains on my face, as much as i'd like it to disappear.

he does turn around though, mumbling what i think is supposed to be 'goodnight,' but sounds more like 'goobnide.' dork.

i stay lying on my back, thinking about the current situation. a summer with tyler wasn't on my bingo card for this year, but i'm not particularly upset about it. i could go without his mood swings, sure, but i understand why they're happening.

i think back to when we were in the fourth grade, when i first realized i liked boys. tyler and i were in his backyard, kicking a ball around. he was telling me about some girl that had told him she had a crush on him. it made me jealous, though i didn't recognize it as jealousy in that moment.

that night, when we were laying in his bed, he asked me if i had a crush on anyone. i took a moment to try and remember everyone in our class.

i didn't quite know what it meant in that moment, but the only kid i could really think of was him.

(an: interesting)