Appa??!!

Chapter 30

What's this another update....damn I really do love you guys !!! I will be trying to upload more so plz make sure to comment and vote ( it low-key motivates me 😩❤️)

As always hope your all doing well make sure ur all eating and drinking enough !!!!! Love u allllll

—————————————————————————

I watch as her hair flys gently through the breeze as she moves gracefully through the kitchen, her brown eyes that I cherish to the depths of my heart....
Is this what love feels like?
I feel as if I'm a child wanting and craving this attention, getting it is like a reward but missing it is the worse punishment. She's the teddy bear I would hold when I was scared and squeezed when I was happy, I couldn't see life without her...

Being with her was like watching fireworks, a beautiful display of emotions shooting thousands of feet into the sky and exploding into kisses of colour. What a sight to see but they never

_ last long, but why ? Why can't fireworks blast the night with colour for a minute, an hour or even for all of eternity?

Why does it all disappear....why does everything fade into the darkness.....why does it always leave me in the dark....

Stella.....why now......why now do I miss you....

"MIN YOONGI" I snapped back into reality to see my boss Mr Bang looking at me with a concerned - but not surprised expression
"Please tell me you managed to get the work done" he says not expecting the work to be completed but DAMN BOI you wrong "actually I have sir" I say proudly standing and passing him the work that needed completed for today
"Great fantastic thank you for that, your free to leave now !" He says with a happy smile as he waddles away

My eyes went to my watch and checked the time, damn I need to get the boys from that I made my way to my car and drove to school. Unfortunately I didn't get any time to sleep I was too busy completing work and thinking about her, why why can't I just forget about her. Maybe the deepest part of my heart I still want her and believe we can still be a happy family.

I made it to the boys school and went straight to pick up Kookie and the twins, Kookie greeted me with a happy hubby smile and the twins looked tired. I placed all boys into the car and waited for Namjoon and Hobi to come to the car, when I did see they approaching I analysed there faces. Hobi just looked grumpy which wasn't like his sunshine self and Namjoon the poor boy looked in pain once again with his hand on his stomach, they jumped into the he car I didn't bother asking anyone how was there day and drove home in complete silence.

as soon as we got home I carried kookie into the living room to play with his toys and the boys ran upstairs, one by one I hear the doors slamming - great. i went straight into the kitchen and started on making dinner for me and the boys, my minds a mess i cant get Stella out my mind she's the only thing im thinking of. am i just horny? there's a possibility.

Stella and me have a very.... complicated relationship we have anways been off and on for around 7 years, i was always scared of commitment but when i would get loney i would just call her up and we would have a good time. she would help me feel more of a man make me feel wanted and worth someone elses love...as i said we always been off and on. she wasnt my first girlfriend but i would say i did see a future together, she moved away but i would see her in our favouite bar and whenever i saw her which would be yearly if i was lucky we would have a good time- well yes you already know this and thats how the children were made. but one question i had was why didnt she tell me any sooner ? why wait for 5 children then tell me, my mind cant make sense that this women ABUSED our children. shes always been a nice kind hearted women so why would she do that? is it her new boyfriend ? was she really not the women i thought she was..... should i meet up with her JUST to sort stuff out - or an i asking for trouble ?

"apppppaaaaa what are you thinking about?" I snapped my head to see Jimin on my leg looking up at me with his cute doll like eyes. I smile and pick up the boy throwing him in the air before catching him and making the boy to burst into laughter "nothing my cute baby, what are you doing in the kitchen you should go play with Kookie he's playing on his own" I suggest to the boy but he shook his head and hugged my tighter making me laugh, what a baby I have. I finish making dinner with Jimin following my every move and then picked up the boy and carried him to the couch were we watched some. SpongeBob was on which grabbed the attention of Tae and joined us on the couch, both twins snuggled into my side making me tired. my eyes slowly drift into a deep sleep allowing my body to rest but my mind to run wild and allowing my fears to run free in my mind

"Yoongi lets get married one day, it would be fun don't you think" her soft words stroked my heart

"you know i don't like the idea of marriage its stupid" i said stroking her hair away from her face watching as her eyes smile at mine

"fine....lets just have children! i think we would be great parents!" the excitement was obvious but once again i turned it down by shaking my head

"children are a waste of time, money and energy. i don't see the point of children all that work no thank you. just want to live happy with the one i love, make money and slowly die." her smile instantly disappeared as she heard my very ambitious plans for our future. However she stilled smiled at me and leaned into a kiss, her touch was soft, calming and addictive I couldn't let go...I didn't want to let go....didn't know how to let go....but somehow the air slipped through my fingertips and I let go....

Next think I knew I was on the ground alone once again...dear god wake me up from this dream

"APPPAAAAAAAA" I gasped for air breathing heavily looking around for the loud scream...sounds like Namjoon ? I look down and see both twins and Kookie fast asleep next to me and hear another scream from Namjoon coming from upstairs, great what does he want now. I huffed and made my way upstairs into his room and see him with red eyes and hands around his stomach, poor thing.
"Ahhhhh is the pain back babe, I'll go get your medication" I said marching back down the stairs picking up his medication and taking it back into his room, after feeding it to him I placed him onto my lap and rocked his back and forth trying to Carol his down. However I don't think it was helping as he wiggled within my arms and didn't look too comfortable, I then got his comfortable in bed and start to lift his shirt up until he stopped me " what are you doing" he asked with concerned expression
" I'm going to give you a little massage hopefully it will get your bowels moving my love" I try explain he needs to poop it's the only way he's going to feel better "No don't want to I'm fine" he said in the most bitches attitude I've ever seen from a six year old. " well your going to be in pain then" I shrugged off and start to leave, I was hoping he stops me but sadly he didn't. I couldn't help him if he doesn't want me to, there's only so much I can do for him plus when he's in more pain he will eventually allow me to help. But for now I'll just keep an eye on him.

After leaving Namjoon I find Hobi "appppaaaaa I'm hungry when are we eatingggggggg" he whines which makes me laugh " go wake up the boys I'll get dinner on the table" which the boy was happy to hear and went running to wake up his siblings. I pop my head back into Namjoons room to see him closing his eyes trying to drift himself to sleep
"Sweetheart we're going to have some dinner I want you to eat, if you don't eat or drink it's only going to make it worse." I say waiting for a response from him, I walk closer to him and stroke his hair " come on should daddy feed you I don't mind" I say more cheerfully " Appa please, I just want to sleep" he said turning his body away from me and moving away from my touch. Once again this stubborn boy didn't want to listen to me, but alas I have to feed my other children.

Namjoon didn't come down to eat so after feeding the children and getting them ready to bed I walked into his room to see him asleep in bed. I was hoping he sleeps through the night and manages to open his bowels in the morning, but for now I'm tired so it's time for bed !!!!!!  

Thank god !!!!