Camilo Madrigal x y/n

Part 42

Carlos' POV:

I hate this. Camilo is asking me questions all the time. He's so annoying. We lay in my bed, just staring at the ceiling.
"I can help you quit..." Camilo suggests.
"I don't need to." I reply.
"But.. if you don't you're just going to slowly kill yourself... And you are slowly killing yourself already.."
"And I'm fine with that."
"How can you just live with all those thoughts, feelings, doubts...?" Camilo questions.
"I don't. I do all of this to forget or distract myself from everything. Besides I'm used to it.."
"It's not normal for a sixteen year old to be going through all of this. Please, I can help! Just try!"
"Why?"
"Because! When was the last time you've been genuinely happy?" Camilo asks.
"I- I can't remember.. maybe... ten years old?"
"Don't you want to feel happy again? Imagine how great that would feel!"
"You're right..."
"So... wanna try and make your life better again?"
"I'll- uh... no... but- ...fine! I'll try..." I felt doubtful.
"Great! Yes! C'mon! Let's start by throwing away all of the things that hurt you, that you can smoke or inject, get you high, and get you drunk!" Camilo stood up.
"Ugh.." I felt sick knowing I won't have any of those things.
"I know it's hard! I went through the same things! But, it'll all be worth it! Alright... where is everything?"
"Uh.. closet, drawers, laundry basket, window sill... and yeah, I think that's it.."
"Alright!"

Camilo's POV:

I go to every spot he named and I took every bottle, needle, cigarette, everything. I took all of it to the trash. I even broke everything so he couldn't go and dig it all out. Carlos wasn't too happy about it.
"I don't know how I'll get through everything.." Carlos says in a shaky voice.
"We'll get through it together! Just talk and cry! That's what helps me!"
"So... every time.. I made fun of you for crying and you would stop... you.. were coping with it? And I stopped you?" Carlos felt mounds of guilt.
"Yeah... kind of. But don't feel bad. It's all good."
We went downstairs. I went to our mother. She was sitting at the table, drinking her coffee. I sit down next to her.
"Hey, ma..."
"Hey.. What's up?" She was still angry.
"I uh.. I felt bad for what had happened.. so-"
"You should be!"
"Uh- I threw away everything.."
"What do you mean?"
"Like.. I threw away every bottle, every cigarette, everything."
"What?! Really?! You did that?!" I couldn't tell if she was mad or happy..
"Yeah.."
"I'M SO PROUD OF YOU!" She hugs us.
"Thanks.."
"Oh! I'm so happy! I have to tell your father! I'm so proud of you! This is a big deal!" She ran off to go tell our dad.
Dolores came walking in.
"So? This is true I hope?" She says.
"Yeah!" I say proudly.
"This is amazing! Thank you Camilo, for helping your brother..!" She winks at me then walks away.
She knows? Well, I guess she hears us talking with the therapist about us being merged..
"I'm not sure I can do this..." Carlos says.
"Why not? Why are you so doubtful?"
"I'm scared to give this all up. It was my safety net for so long.."
"How long?"
"Since I was thirteen..."
"Holy shit.. You've been doing this that long?"
"Yep.. never skipped one night."
"This may be harder than I thought.. Where do you get all of it?"
"Friends. But I'm not sure where they get it."
"Carlos.. Are you sure they're actually your friends?"
"Yeah! Why? You don't think so?" He was confused.
"Well, friends wouldn't want to put you through this... You know? Are you sure they aren't just people you have fun getting high with?"
Carlos went quiet. He didn't respond. I bet it finally hit him. He started to cry. He tried to stay quiet while crying but it wasn't working.
"Carlos? Are you okay?"
"No..."
"What? Was it something I said?"
"No. But... you made me realize I have no 'friends' that actually care about me..."
"Oh.. I'm sorry. I didn't mean-"
"It's fine. Just one more reason to start drinking again."
"No! You don't mean that! Don't say that!" I started getting concerned.
"I do mean it. But I'll still try."
"Good."

⚠️⚠️⚠️

Carlos and I fell asleep for the night. There was a white flash. I had woken up in the morning, on the bing bag chair. WAIT! I'M ME AGAIN! YES! I run up the stairs to go see Carlos. I walk into his room... but he wasn't there. I hear throwing up coming from the bathroom. I go over to the bathroom. Carlos is crying and throwing up. I go over and sit next to him.
"Go!" He says.
"Why?"
"I don't want you to be here!"
I still stayed by his side. He leaned back onto the wall. There were tears running down his face non stop. His eyes were bloodshot. His nose was red from crying.
"Why are you throwing up?" I ask.
"I-I don't want t-to talk about i-it.."
"Carlos? What happened?"
"Fine! I-I drank last night... a lot!"
"....how many bottles?"
"Uh.. six? Maybe more.."
"Carlos! That's way more than what your body can handle!"
"Exactly.."
"You didn't try to do that, did you... Carlos! Please don't tell me you tried to give yourself alcohol poisoning!" I started to breathe heavily.
"I did..."
"Carlos! Why?! Huh- wait-" I noticed his arm bleeding crazily.
I lifted his arm. There were deep, deep, deep cuts.
"Carlos! We've got to bandage this up before you bleed to death!" His blood was dripping to the floor.
He was standing in a small, shallow pool of his own blood.
"I-I'm so sorry."
"For what?" I ask.
"For waking up this time." Carlos' legs started to become weak.
He couldn't hold his head up.
"CARLOS!" He fell to the floor.
No! Is he dead?! All of a sudden I hear screaming coming from behind me. I look towards the doorway. There standing was Antonio. His eyes were huge and filled with tears.
"What happened to Carlos?!" Antonio put his hands to mouth.
"ANTONIO! YOU SHOULD'NT BE HERE!" I quickly cover his eyes and I run him into my parents room.
My parents weren't in their room. I sit crying Antonio on their bed.
"Everything's okay! Okay? Stay here! Don't leave this room!"
"What happened to Carlos?!" Antonio was sobbing.
"He- uh... I'll tell you later! I love you! Stay strong for me? Stay here, got it?" I ran out of the room.
I don't know what to do! No body is home right now! I can't just let him bleed! I take a towel that was hanging. I wrap the towel around his arm. It didn't stop the bleeding all that well. I check his pulse in his neck. It was a very weak pulse. Carlos is on the edge of life and death...