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Enterprise - "No, for the last time, you can't waterboard Zuikaku to "test she is a resilient opponent against you."
Hornet - "Faking documents signed by me to recreate the doolittle raid on the sakura base with napalm bombs is not okay. What is wrong with you?"
New Jersey - "The movie battleship isn't real, your sister didn't, in fact, fight alien creatures like the sirens."
North Carolina - "Stop proclaiming your erotic passion towards bunnies by wearing a bunny suit, I'll have to detain you for being into beastiality."
Vestal - "I appreciate your concern, but I don't need you giving me 50 packs of adderall pills every day, who even supplies you that many?"
Bismarck - "I don't remember asking you to give me a signed copy of Mein Kampf."
Prinz Eugen - "Just because the asylum is called "Camp Concentrate", doesn't mean you sent all the royal navy and iris libre destroyers and cruisers there to "learn how to properly use the showers."
Deutschland - "I don't want a a nazi flag in my office, why do you even have so many anyways?"
Akashi - "Stop painting tier 3 crates to look like tier 4 crates, you'll just ruin the economy here."
Akagi - "Asking Akashi to build prototype Ohka kamikaze planes to use against the Enterprise isn't the best way to respond to her saying you're a, and quote, "skimpy fox slut-for-grabs."
Unicorn - "Whoever told you to duct tape AGM-114 Hellfire missiles to your spitfires should be reported to me immediately."
Shiranui - "Just because you can come in contact with spirits, doesn't mean you can contact the dead, stop giving Akagi and Kaga false hope."
Ark Royal - "If you keep drugging the destroyers, we'll send you to Camp Concentration."
Sheffield - "If possible, stop having erotic roleplay with Edinburgh, she's very uncomfortable with it."
Belfast - I admire your efforts in trying to reach out to Monarch, but stop spiking her tea with laxatives."
Long Island - "Y2K was 20 years ago, get over it. And no, I'm not a boomer, you're older than me."
Yorktown - "Don't ever say "just nuke Hiroshima and Nagasaki again like in the 1940s" again in front of me or any shipgirl from sakura empire."
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Azur Lane - Crackhead's Paradise
FanfictionAfter much debate, the higher ups agreed on having the commander of azur lane give weekly reports on what's happening on the base. In the reports, the commander is to write down what has occurred on the base, every week, from now on. The following r...
