Love Buzz - Kurt Cobain Fanfic

Chapter Twelve

  Kurt's Point of View
'Good job, you piece of shit.' I thought to myself as I backed out of the driveway. I was killing myself by injecting drugs into my veins, all while pushing the few people who gave a flying fuck about me away. I had never loved anyone more than I loved Jade. It made me crazy to think I could die and she'd be left behind with a broken heart. "Why the fuck does she even love me anyway?" I mumbled as I drove to the diner. I knew that Jade wouldn't put up with or tolerate this bullshit that they call drug addiction. She loved me to pieces and I knew it, but I also knew she was too smart to deal with an idiot. I chose a seat in the back of the diner where no one was and pulled out my journal. My stomach burned and I became nauseous. My stomach was making me want to die. The only way to control it was by doing heroin, or so that I've tried anyway. But if you're going to feel like a junkie everyday, you might as well be one, right? The band had a tour coming up and I didn't even wanna think about it.  Dealing with my stomach, heroin, Jade, all while traveling. I thought about the way Jade looks at me and it made me sick. I couldn't stand her looking at me like I was Jesus. Like she worshiped me. I was the scum of the earth and she was the most beautiful soul I had ever seen. None of it made any sense. 'Fuck, nothing in my life makes any sense. ' I thought to myself.' I sighed and began writing my letter to Jade.
Jade's Point of View
I sat on the couch for a good hour in silence. I was terrified of losing Kurt. I couldn't handle it. He was my soulmate, my best friend. About two hours later, I heard a car pull into the driveway again. This time, my heart didn't beat any faster. I think I had become numb. Kurt walked in the door and seemed annoyed. He didn't say anything, he just dropped a note in front of me and walked upstairs. I picked it up. "Hi. I know you're upset with me. I'd be upset too if I was dating a pathetic, heroin addicted asshole. Its just my stomach bugs the ever living shit out of me everyday and herion is the only thing so far that has made me fee any better. Besides, I feel like a junkie, so why not be one? Just know that I do love you, my Jade. So fucking much. Don't cry over me. I swear to you I am not worth it. Sincerely, your addict, piece of shit scrumbag." I sighed as I folded the note back up and put it into my pocket. I took a deep breath and walked upstairs to see Kurt laying on the bed, strumming a guitar. "Hey." I mumbled. "Hi." He barely whispered.  I slowly walked over to him and took a seat. "Kurt, listen. I'm not exactly sure how i'm supossed to deal with this. But, I do know that I wanna help you. I wanna bring you out of this. I don't wanna lose you from an overdose. Kurt please, I fucking love you. You can't die." I began to sob. 'Good job, Jade. ' I thought to myself. Kurt sighed and pulled me into his arms. "I'm not gonna die, Jade. I'm here. Okay? I'm here." He kissed the top of my head. "Kurt but you can't know that for sure. Will you please do something for me?" I asked as I ran my fingers through his blonde  hair. "What?" He asked, curious, furrowing his eyebrows. "Will you please go to rehab if I promise to visit you all the time? And see more doctors about your stomach?" I asked, nervously. Kurt stared into space for a moment and sighed. "I'll try." He mumbled. I sighed with relief. It was a start.