She Has No Idea - Book 1

Epilogue~Journal Entry

I lied.  THIS is the last chapter to the book!  There's also a tiny bit of foreshadowing for the next book, "Worldwide", in this chapter. 

Thank you so much to everyone who supported me with this story!  I really apreciate it!

Enjoy :)

xoxo NB

~*~*~*~*~*~

Dear Journal,

You may never believe what I’m about to say (or write).  I don’t blame you though; it was a huge jump in my personality.  Ok…here goes nothing.

I love him.

You don’t know who I’m talking about?  Alright, go find the word “hate” in one of my past entrees and then read the very next word.  You’ll know EXACTLY who I’m talking about.

James.

I know…huge leap.

Turns out, however, I loved him all along.  My mind was playing tricks on me, and I convinced myself for so long that I hated this man.  I loved him more than anything, though.  I didn’t even realize how much I knew about him until last night.  In fact, I made a list of things I love about James.  Here it is:

Things I Love About James David Maslow:

1. His name.  It’s so old fashioned!

2. The way he smiles when I say his name

3. His smile in general

4. When he wears glasses because he doesn’t feel like putting his contacts in

5. The way he talks to his dog

6. The way he dances

7. When he just acts silly

8. The fact that he (and sometimes Kendall) always has to take care of the band

9. The way his hazel eyes sparkle brighter than the sun

10. How he gets easily angry at people who annoy him (he makes sure to make funny faces at them too)

11. His hugs

12. His voice (Duh!  This should be at the top of the list!  I’m too lazy to put it there though)

13. His taste in clothes

14. When he gives me flowers, particularly daisies

15. The way he bites his knuckle when he’s shocked

16. The fact that he can’t take his hands off of me

17. The small things he does for me

18. The way he kisses me

19. How he runs his hand through his brown hair when he’s stressed out

20. The way he loves me too

The list goes on and on. How about this: I love everything about him.  I even love his slightly selfish personality.  The thing is I’m getting ready to board a plane to go home.  Finally.  So I don’t have a lot of time to write down everything. 

Since I only have about seven minutes to write before I have to go, I’m going to tell you about last night.

I fell asleep on James.  Literally

Last night, I told him I loved him for the first time in my life.  I don’t regret it one bit.  It seemed like he was waiting his whole life for me to say those three words.  I mean, now that I think about it, I guess he did wait his whole life, or two-and-a-half years of it at least. 

In the end, he and I plopped onto the not-so-comfortable hotel bed and fell right asleep after what felt like the longest day of my life.  That’s that.

You know, he never asked me to be his official girlfriend.  I guess it doesn’t matter.  It’s pretty obvious anyways.

Now I wonder what Kendall did last night.  He left when I knocked on his hotel room door, but I fell asleep before he came back.  I bet he took awkward pictures of us and put them online.  Nah…that would be something Carlos would do.  Kendall was my alarm clock this morning, you know.  Yeah, he poked James and me until we woke up.  Let’s see, how can I describe his finger?  I knife maybe?  Gosh, did he poke me hard!

Well, I guess I better go now since Logan keeps nagging me about our plane that we have to catch.  Typical Logan.

~Dilly

“Yes, finally!  You act like that thing is your whole life!  Now let’s go so we can get on the plane!” Logan complained.  He sounded like he was five years old.

“Gosh Logan.  You’re so paranoid.  Besides, it’s our private jet.  They’re not going to leave without us,” Kendall gave Logan a funny look.

“Oh yeah.”  If Logan were blond, this would be the perfect blond joke.

I jumped when I felt an arm slip around my waist, but relaxed when I discovered that it was just James.  I smiled as the memory of that picture from the magazine article crossed my mind.  Like a puzzle piece.

“Are you ready to go?” he looked at me with those dazzling hazel eyes.

“To go home?  Oh, I was born ready.  Look out sunny beaches, here I come!”

He chuckled.  I love his laugh; it’s so contagious.

~//~

When we sat down on the plane, it was exactly the same as last time.  I sat in between Lillian and James, away from a window.

“Still afraid of the window seats?”  James said as if he read my mind.  That’s another thing I love about him; his telepathy with me.

I shook my head yes.

“Come on Dilly!  You’ll have to get over this fear one of these days, especially if you’re expecting to go on tour yourself,” Lillian joined in.

“At least you can hold my hand this time,” James held his hand out and wide open, throwing me a half-smile.

I grabbed it and squeezed it as hard as I could.  Of course, he didn’t flinch at all.

I could hear the jet begin to lift off.  It was a loud and excruciating noise, one I didn’t want to listen to.  I rummaged through my purse for my ipod and headphones, and I plugged them in my ears.  I pressed the play button.  Whatever decides to play first, I will listen to it. 

The song was, “No Idea”.  Yeah, I listen to Big Time Rush’s music now.

It’s my favorite song by them.  It has a lot of meaning to it.  I leaned back in my chair and closed my eyes, focusing on the lyrics to the song.

“She has no idea, no idea that I’m even here, I’m even here.”

My fingers were still tightly intertwined with James’.  I held his hand against my cheek like a pillow.

The song continued in my ears, “She has no idea, no idea I’m standing here, I’m standing here.”

It took me quite a while to realize that part of the song did not in fact come from my ear buds, but it came from a natural voice, a whisper in my ear.  I turned my head to face James, who had a smirk on his face. 

“You need to stop eavesdropping,” I scolded him.

“I couldn’t help it.”

He then leaned in and planted a kiss on my lips, canceling out the loud noises that the jet made.