Not In That Way - Lauren Jauregui/You *in editing*

chapter 23.

Your P.O.V

The rest of the ride was peaceful, Lauren just rested her head on my shoulder and I had time to think about, well about a lot of things actually.

"We're here." The taxi driver said and Lauren and I climbed, Lauren paid the driver and we made our way to a table that was already occupied by our families.
"So, how are you both?" Lauren's father questioned.
"I'm great, life is busy but I can't complain." I said followed by a small smile.

The conversation flowed on all throughout the meal, various topics were discussed, it went from Fifth Harmony's album sales to my studying to our parents jobs. I decided just to sit back and listen.

I had made up my mind of what I wanted and nobody was going to change that.

--

We finished at the restaurant and we all decided to go for a walk for a while, Lauren and I let our families walk ahead and we trailed behind as we needed to talk.

"There's something I need to tell you." I started and Lauren looked uneasy.
"I can't do this." I told her.
"You're breaking up with me?" She questioned gripping my hand tightly almost like if she let go I would float away from her.

I took my hand from hers and slid the ring off of my finger, I placed it in the pocket of her leather jacket and stood holding both of her hands making her face me.

"I think we should be friends. I mean properly try and be friends, not the friends we have been where as soon as we see each other we are magically back together. What I'm trying to say is that I don't think we are destined to be together in that way. Not right now anyway. I'm sorry." I told her, tears were filing both of our eyes.
"Is this because of what Camila said about me sleeping around when we broke up before?" She asked.
"No, it has nothing to do with that. But there is something else..I..I slept with Camila...again." I told her and braced myself for her to flip.
"When?" She questioned calmly.
"This morning." I told her.
"I'm going to kill her." She turned and started to walk in the opposite direction, I caught up to her and grabbed her arm before turning her around.
"Don't. Please don't.." I begged.
"Is that why you're breaking up with me? You still love her don't her. If you want to be with her just tell me." She had tears streaming down her cheeks, I just wanted to hold her.
"No, I'm not leaving you to be with anyone. This isn't about Camila, this is about you. This is about you being distant and cold all the time. This is about you never saying or showing how you feel, this is about you making me feel like I am never good enough for you. This is not about anybody else, this is about you and me." I spat.
"You want to know how I feel? I don't talk about how I feel because I can't find words to explain how crazy in love with you I am. I am terrified by how much I love you, I constantly think about you, everything reminds me of you. I love you, I love everything about. I love all your insecurities, I love how you always make everyone feel loved and welcomed, I love your way with words. I love every little thing about you. How I feel about you is indescribable." She says and I feel tears streaming down my cheeks.
"Please don't leave me, I can forget about you and Camila. We can get past this. I'll try and be better and more open please, I need you." She begs.
"I need you too. You don't need to change, I'm the one who needs to change. This break up, it's for the best." I told her.

--

"If I'm being completely honest I am glad you have left Lauren. You see I think deep down you are a good person with good intentions but you have messed that girl around far too much. I suggest you cut all ties with both Lauren and Camila for maybe a few months then see how you feel but if I were you I wouldn't be surprised if neither of them wanted you because they realised that you are a pretty shit person." Dinah spoke the truth, the harsh truth but I needed some honesty on the situation.
"I know and I don't want to argue. I just came to say goodbye, my flight leaves in three hours and I've still got to say goodbye to everyone else. Just please don't hate, I already hate myself enough for all the pain I have caused." I said looking down at the floor. The next thing I felt was arms wrapped around my body.
"I don't hate you, I'm just angry because you hurt two of my best friends. They're like my sisters, you hurt them, you hurt me." She said after we pulled out of our embrace.