Loving Jemima

4. Princess peppy

Jemima

Matty stood waiting for my response, I sat watching him dry his hair, when I didn't reply he discarded his towel in my wash basket and sat next to me on my bed. He chewed the inside of his mouth contemplating something, he took his hand and hesitantly went to place it on my stomach.
"No matty" I sighed
"I didn't ask anything yet!"
"I know what your going to ask, it's like you boys are obsessed with me getting pregnant, just because I had Arthur doesn't mean..."
"Alright Alright, But you know I have to ask!"
"No, no you don't!" I quipped at him annoyed "I'd probably tell you before the baby daddy Matty! So stop bloody asking every time there's a fucking problem!"
"Soooo..."
"It's not a big deal Matty!"
"Then there's no problem telling me then is there!" He flopped back kicking his feet up on my bed so he was laying next to me.

"Fine! But it's NOT a big deal and I don't want a fuss!" He nodded "William and I broke up" I said quietly
"What! three months ago!" I nodded "you ok?"
"Yep" I popped,laying next to him
"What happened? What did he do? Did he cheat on you? Do I need to pay posh boy a big brother visit?"
"No leave him alone."
"Are you sure you're not pregnant jem? If you are and he's done a runner on you, you know I'll support you with what ever you decide to do.....after I break his legs."
"No leave him alone! I'm not Matty I promise. I'll even pee on a stick to prove it if you want."

"So what happened Jem?"
"Not a lot, it just wasn't working out you know" I shrugged, not wanting to tell him the truth that it was because I was in love with one of his best friends who turned out to be a total bastard.
"I see, well as long as you're ok, I have to be honest I didn't see it coming, I thought you two were all good. The long distance thing not work out? you could have just told me. I presumed you were just struggling with him being away! I thought at first that it wouldn't last with him being away but you'd seemed to be doing fine sis?"
"We're still good friends, it was amicable, I'm ok, it's just...I feel a bit guilty that I'm ok, if you know what I mean, but I guess the fact that I'm ok means it was the right decision, don't you think? I think if we weren't still friends I'd be upset but we are so I'm good."
"Yeah I guess you're right. I'm impressed you're dealing with it better than I thought you would. If you ever need to talk I'm here ok." I snuggled in to him and he gave me a squeeze

"Thank you, I'm good. Maybe if he wasn't leaving then things would have played out differently, I think it was a big factor."
"I know, he was struggling with it too. I thought he might quit and stay, shame he went the other way, I'm sorry sis."
"I think he knows I wouldn't have let him, I mean he already gave up a year for me. I was holding him back, I wasn't good enough for him, not that he'd ever say it out loud but we all know it."
"You are good enough Jem, like you say if circumstances were different. Just bad timing I guess. You never know, might work out in the future at some point."
"Yeah maybe, who knows. I miss him but I'm okay Matty. We still talk and text.. I think not having to go cold turkey helped. Maybe I should have just gone with him like he wanted. Sometimes I think I made the wrong choice." I sighed
"You weren't ready sis." Matty stroked his finger on my temple "and you knew it without me having to say it which I'm really proud of you for Jem. Only time will tell if it was the right choice Jem."

"so...Felix..his mates....what you said this morning." I shook my head into his side "Jem! Come on you've clearly remembered something about that night in the hotel. I know you! that wasn't just for candy's benefit, I can tell now you know!" I jumped up and darted to the bathroom to throw up again. Matty rushed after me rubbing my back "it's ok Jem, it's over now ok, either way, whatever you remembered it's over. They're not coming anywhere near you again. You ever want to talk about it you know where I am though kiddo, anytime, day or night. You don't need to keep things from me Jem. I know it's part of your issues and I don't fully understand what the hang up is about telling me things but I'm here ok, anytime you need me I'm here, you could have told me about William jem, I wouldn't have said anything to the boys until you were ready to. It's you and me kiddo, always will be you and me. Ok? So stop packing, you're not going anywhere, I've got your back kiddo. No ones taking sides alright? Just talk to them, you and I both know you're not leaving." I nodded at him in between heaves, I cleaned myself up and we went reluctantly downstairs.