NOT SO GOOD BOY

Episode 39

Hoseok let out a soft sigh as he scrolled over endless dance videos on Instagram.

He was in the storage room, waiting for Seokjin to come join him, but the older didn't seem like he'd come any time soon.

And there Hoseok was using up all his data to get lost on his feed, trying his best to resist the urge to go on his boyfriend's profile.

He stood up, there were only a few minutes left of break and he hadn't eaten his lunch yet because he had waited for Seokjin for them to eat together.

Well, that's what he had hoped for.

Dusting himself off and picking up his lunchbox, he walked out of the cramped room and into the crowded hallways, students walking around to stretch their legs after long classes.

Hoseok kept a smile despite being a little down in the dumps, greeting the people he knew and returning handshakes.

He passed Seokjin's homeroom class, stopping a few seconds to check if his boyfriend was there.

He was.

Sitting at his table, with half the class surrounding him and laughing loudly, girls touching his arm and playing with their hair flirtatiously.

Hoseok had the urge to enter, but he didn't want to ruin the mood. He knew Seokjim wouldn't understand what was troubling him anyway.

He was always so carefree and liberal, it seemed completely normal to him to flirt with everyone openly even though he was in a relationship.

Flirting was his way of being nice, and he couldn't understand why it bothered his boyfriend.

Hoseok sighed. Seokjin seemed to be having fun anyway.

As much as it pained him, he walked on and reached his own homeroom, sitting at his desk and quickly scarfing down his meal before his teacher came in.

***

Just as Hoseok packed his things, Seokjin popped his head at the door, a bright smile on his lips.

"Hey Hobi." He smiled, entering the class, greeting a few people he knew before joining Hoseok at his table.

"Hey." Hoseok said, not returning his smile.

Seokjin didn't seem to notice and immediately started talking.

"Remember Taehyung's brother? Of course you do, he's your ex. Well, Taehyung told me he had a slot for you to perform at his bar." Seokjin said. "Isn't that great?"

"Yup." Hoseok answered, not finding it in him to smile despite the good news. He stood up and slung his bag over his shoulder.

"What's wrong?" Seokjin asked, the enthousiasme dying down in his voice as he finally noticed his boyfriend's gloomy mood.

"Nothing." Hoseok answered, offering a weak smile.

"Well no, obviously something is wrong." Seokjin said. "What is it?"

Hoseok sighed. "Where were you at lunch?"

"In my class? Why?" Seokjin asked, confused, before his features morphed in realisation.

"Oh my god! We were supposed to eat together." He said, facepalming. "I'm so sorry, I forgot again."

Hoseok sighed, looking away from the older and walking into the busy hallways.

"It's fine."

"Is that the only reason you're down in the dumps?" Seokjin asked, walking alongside his boyfriend.

Hoseok frowned, there he goes again, dismissing his feelings.

"I waited for you." He said.

"I know, I'm really sorry. Let's eat together tomorrow yeah?"

Hoseok sighed.

"You said that yesterday too." He mumbled.

"Come on Hobi." Seokjin nudged his shoulder as they walked side by side. "I'll pay this time, mhm?"

Hoseok scoffed, he stopped walking and looked at Seokjin with slightly squinted eyes, not wanting to believe what was in front of him. Seokjin seemed completely unbothered, as if this was nothing more than an argument over dipping fries in milkshakes.

"It doesn't even feel like we're a couple." He suddenly said, looking right at Seokjin.

Seokjin's smile dropped. Instantly.

"What?"

"You're not even holding my hand." Hoseok said, smiling sadly, raising a hand to rub his eyes tiredly.

"Well, why don't you hold mine?" Seokjin asked.

"Because I'm tired Seokjin." Hoseok suddenly snapped, his hand dropping to his side. "I'm tired of always making the first move. Do you even like me?"

"Hobi, of course i do." Seokjin answered, suddenly serious. He even looked worried.

Hoseok sighed, running a hand through his hair in frustration.

"Why didn't you tell me you were feeling like this?" Seokjin asked, reached a hand to Hoseok's cheek, but the younger pushed it away.

"Because you're always talking about how other couples are cheesy and stupid, how you don't like affection, how I'm cheesy, you dismiss my feelings when I tell you about them. I just- I'm just tired, i don't want to try anymore." Hoseok said.

"Hoseok. I-" Seokjin cleated his throat uncomfortably. "I don't even know what to say- I mean, I thought we were cool, I- I didn't know I was making you feel bad. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"What did you want me to say huh? Pay more attention to me? You would have just made fun of me for being needy."

"Hoseok..." Seokjin was out of words.

He truly did love Hoseok, and now felt bad for having being so emotionally taxing on his own boyfriend.

"You never hold my hand, never kiss me, never touch me, I don't feel like this is working anymore."

"Hoseok!" Seokjin said in disbelief.

"I really like you Seokjin, but I think we need a break."

He was completely lost. Hoseok had been at his side since they had started dating almost a year ago, he was his best friend, his lover.

Having Hoseok look at him with such sad eyes as he put distance between them, made him feel stupid for always taking him for granted.

"T-take your time." Seokjin said, suddenly feeling too ashamed to look into the other's eyes. "I'm sorry."

Hoseok nodded, before walking away, alone.