Astronomy // Percy Weasley

A Stab Of Death

A/n Warning: suicide attempt, PTSD, depression and major anxiety. Don't read if you get triggered by this kind of thing.
Posted: 17th August 2020.

So, I'm sorry to my unknown lover.
Sorry that I can't believe.
That anybody ever really,
Starts to fall in love with me.

Roselyn's POV.
A week. One week since dad died. One week since I lost the final bit of family I had. One week since everyone found out I'm Roselyn Andromeda Black. Recently life has been so unbearable, so atrocious, so plain.

Sighing I walk I look out of the window on the fifth floor and pull out my medication. I know I shouldn't be doing this but I have to, everything just hurts too much.

It's like I'm feeling everything but nothing at the same time. It's as though I am holding all the secrets and sins of the world.

Honestly it's crazy that I've survived this far without just cracking or breaking. And I hate that I am the one always helping everyone or giving people advice but no one does that for me.

Though I know Isobel tries, I just can't anymore and she knows that but she's never given up on me. You see, she's a certain type of strong.

The type that has only one huge problem which makes my hundreds of small and medium problems look painfully stupid.

So, thinking of everything wrong with my life and I begin to think about the impact on others (though I am convinced it won't matter). Sighing, I look once more at the tablets in my hand.

Then I have a flashback to second year when I am writing to Tom, and it reminds me so much of the hopeless, scared feeling inside of me now.

Start of Flashback.
Once I am finished with my DADA school work - after checking no one in the classroom is looking - I pull out the diary.

I open it, writing "Hello Tom" and Tom writes back "Good afternoon Carina
How are you feeling?". I quickly write back, truthfully "I'm honestly not sure, I feel so empty".

Then after my writing sinks in, more ink shows up "Yeah, I completely understand. I've grown up in an orphanage and have never made friends with any there".

I write back "Well I don't see why they wouldn't be friends with you. To me you are very charming and gentlemanly".

"Thank you, you must know I think rather highly of you" the ink appears in a elegant cursive, his words causing me to blush, a deep crimson.

Averting my gaze to the diary, I write back "What about you? How have you been recently? It feels as though we haven't been writing as much".

After mine disappears, Tom's appear "Fine, but Orion has been more unbearable than usual. Now, why don't you tell me more about your friends".

"All but a few are not talking to me. So as much as Isobel and Neville are nice company, it feels as though they don't care like you do" I write sadly.

"I'm certain it shall work out" Tom writes soothingly, "What about that Percy, you've talked so avidly about in the past?".

With sorrow and regret in my eyes, I write "Not too well, he and Penelope are doing far too good. She is all Percy ever talks about".

"Well maybe as you get older it shall work but you also have me" Tom wrote, and I feel a warmth into my chest caused by the fact someone actually cares about me.

"Thank you. It's nice to have a friend, who I can explain everything too and understands so much" I write back, sincerely.
End of flashback.

Just as I swallow the medication, I turn around, seeing that Izzy and Neville are running towards me. My gaze falls to them as my vision goes blurry and I begin seeing black dots. Then my head hits the floor, and I see nothing but darkness.

*Later that Day*.

Roselyn's POV.
After I wake up, Isobel says "Now Lyn, I am so sorry that we weren't paying attention to your feelings and problems. None of us understand could how you feel as we've never been through this but we will help you".

I nod saying "What about Harry and Neville? They both lost their parents". Then sighing, Harry answers "No, I never had a chance to get too know them, while you got to know Sirius".

Next Ginny explains "We want to help you so we'll be monitoring your behaviour. Each week we will switch other, first week it's Dite and me, then we'll continue between the group".

Continuing on Blaise says "Week one of the summer, it's me, Theo and Pansy. We shall also be taking away any item that can harm you besides your wand".

I look at them confused as too how they know about the scars, until Hermione says "All school year since last July, your metamorphosis powers have been faltering and we kept seeing things but we assumed it was a trick of the light".

As I slowly sit up I think 'Percy', I say trying to explain "When something upsets a metamorphmagus, like a death or anything close like that, well their magic occasionally falters".

With a sorry look on his face, Ron asks "Is that what has been happening to Tonks?". I frown confused, before saying "It's been happening to Tonks as well?".

Ginny nods, "Yeah, we saw when she came to check on you yesterday?", I look at them surprised "How long was I out?". "A week" Hermione answers nervously, "We thought you weren't going to make it".

I look down sadly, feeling guilty for making them worry so much. I sigh, saying quietly, "I'm sorry". Neville looks at me, saying nothing before he pulls me into a hug, making me flinch slightly but I hug back nonetheless.