Falice One Shots by falicewins

Our Baby [2x19]

''You don't understand what I've done, FP. You don't understand what I'm responsible for.'' Her voice was desperate and squeaky, as she tried to point out the biggest mistake she had ever made.

Why was this man not mad at her? Why wasn't he yelling? Did he even understand that she was the one that had driven their son into his death? She needed him to hate her as much as she was hating herself.

But against all her expectations he held her shoulders more firmly than before and pulled her closely to his chest. Of everything she thought he would do, this had never come up into her mind. But there she was, crying into the chest of the father of her first born after telling him what she had done. She wanted to say so much, but all she managed to do was sob quietly as he shushed her.

''It's okay, it's okay.'' She heard his soft voice telling her in a whisper. How could he say that? Things weren't okay, and it was all her fault.

All the mistakes she had made in her life came down to this moment where she finally had to confess that she was a mess, that she had screwed up and that both her son and FP were the victim of the decisions she made for the three of them when she was young.

Alice held onto him for dear life, as if she would end up in a never-ending fall if she would let go. Her nails dug through his flannel and t-shirt into his skin, making FP realize that this wasn't some nightmare he would wake up out very soon. This was reality.

The broken woman in his arms was real and her story was too. There were so many things going through his mind and so many emotions raging through his body. It was overwhelming in a way he had never experienced before and if he was honest with himself it was frightening him.

''I'm so, so, so sorry, FP.'' She cried quietly, her nails now leaving a serious mark on his back. Before he gently pulled her away, he nuzzled his head in her hair and took in her scent, giving himself another confirmation that he isn't hallucinating her.

When Alice faced him again, she looked at him with her mascara smudged all over her face and her eyes red and puffy from all the crying. Her head was pounding, and her vision was mostly blurry. Still, the look in his eyes was crystal clear to her.

All her life she had never seen him like this, which said so much about his state right now since they went through a lot together. He had never looked at her so scared, broken and confused like he was doing right now.

Not even after he had escaped to her when his Dad had used him has his target again, or when they played Gryphons and Gargoyle's and things got too serious. Maybe not even when his Dad had broken his wrist and took away his opportunity to go to college to be free of the Jones men curse. Everything he was feeling right now felt worse than all those things combined. He took a step backwards as he looked, fighting the urge to break down in tears and get out of the trailer. But there was one thing holding him back.

This was Alice he was talking about. This was the woman who stood in front of his trailer door just a couple of weeks ago, shirt buttoned open and her eyes full of lust. This was the Alice he buried a body for. This was the Alice he once let go. This was his Alice. Or at least, at some point she had been. Until everything fell apart and they turned into enemies who'd rather pretend to want to smash each other brains out than to face the too painful emotions that were buried deep down.

She had never looked at him with so much pain and guilt in her eyes that it was almost hard to recognize this side of her. Still, in her eyes there would always be that one thing, that one little spark that reminded me of the girl she used to be. It was the spark that made her human and vulnerable. Even when it was almost extinguished, he could still see it.