17. Harry

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{written in harrys pov, thought a change was needed and i may do this often. sorry for repetitive chapters 15 & 16 i believe, and id fix it but it would mess up the sorry. thanks for reading, like and comment to keep updates daily!!}

I sat in the floor, my head placed in my hands. I didn't want to look at Louis, because god, the last thing i needed was his pity and unneeded empathy.

I love him with every inch of my being, i know he wants explanations and i know i cant give them- not yet. Its not that i dont want to, i do so much its just that i cant seem to tell him about my most vulnerable state.

But I don't want to rethink about what happened- jesus i dont. It wrecked me emotionally and mentally. The things i saw during my absence are hauntings i will never unsee.

I had lost so many things that people my age look forward too, and cherish until the end of time. But me? I was fucking robbed of my milestones.

I wiped my tears with the long sweater sleeves and sighed, defeated. The sun was rising, pinks, purples, blues, oranges and whites flooding through the blinds.

I glance over to the boy in the red sweater, and smile weakly. I wish things were simpler, and that i could just be who he wants me to be. But now all i can do is try. So i shuffle over to him and wrap my arms around his small frame, and breathe him in like my life depends on it. And honestly, it does. Without Louis by my side, i have no idea where id be.

And as cliché as it sounds, Louis is my sun, moon and all of my stars. He's the atmosphere that keeps me level, the wind that guides him throughout his life.

I pulled from the hug and reached to touch Louis' tired, scruffy looking face and spoke slowly as i caressed his cheek. "I love you, i love you, i love you. Bear with me, I promise I will love you the way that you deserve to be loved. Until the end of time, you have written your initials and the deepest crevice of my heart and soul. I will work everyday to be a better person for you."

He just looks at me shocked, the expression painted so vividly across his beautiful features and i melt in his arms at seven thirty a.m.

"Harry, I swear to god i fucking love you. Now and until my heart stops beating. I know you have troubles, but for you I would shower you in kisses to some how deplete the significance of it all. I love you, all parts of you and I wouldn't want these feelings for anyone else. Harry, you're so beautiful. Looks, personality and soul. I want to spend forever with you."

The confessions were made, honest and tender the way they should be. Each word flowing as effortlessly as the previous, because the feelings were from the heart.

Our foreheads resting gently, sharing breathes as we are connected.
We lean in, my heart flutters and i hope this feeling will never go away. And it doesn't, even when we tilt our heads together, lips touching with every breath, i want him. All of him.

The anticipation building up to the kiss, our emotions mirrored in our shaking lips. And the moment they connect his hands travel through my tangled curls and i wrap my arms around his neck and we're re physically so close but somehow not close enough. And i feel so loved and desired.

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