Damaged / ℂ𝕠𝕞𝕡𝕝𝕖𝕥𝕖𝕕 /

Sixty - One

"So, you're back with Noah?" Lucas asked while we were waiting on everyone to come into the cafe "What? I'm not, who said that?" I said quickly.

"Ava, one moment you are the most depressed girl on earth and then suddenly you are friends with your ex, the boy that broke your heart and proud, you cant just be friends with your ex" He whispered once they came in.

"We are not back together" I mumbled and smiled at them "Princess" Nate said sitting down "Who?" I snorted "You, duh" He laughed, I chuckled shaking my head.

"Your hickey faded" Justin smirked "It did" I said awkwardly, then everyone looked at Noah "What?" He said awkwardly "You don't have anything to say?" Lucas tried him.

"I hope it was a good fuck" He chuckled "Guys leave them alone" Isa laughed, thank God.

"Christmas is coming!" I changed the subject "You're still leaving?" Noah asked "Yeah, to see my dad" I said excited.

"Nice" He smiled a bit "Am I still welcome?" He said quietly, I looked around and everyone was looking at me, I sighed "Guys please" I said getting up and walking out with my coffee.

We were outside now since Noah followed me "It's like you want them to find out" I muttered "What? Why would I?" He asked confused.

"You are still welcome, even though I know you aren't coming" I shrugged "Why wouldn't I?" He chuckled "Because we aren't a couple anymore and it would be awkward to fake it"

"Does that make my chance bigger to be your boyfriend again?" He asked quietly, I sighed "Noah..." I warned him "How much time do you need, Ava?" He groaned "Don't start this with me" I warned him again.

"I've been trying, and I've been trying so hard but all you ever want is sex with me, I can't even give you a decent kiss before you freak and tell me not to kiss you like that" He breathed out.

"I.." I began, but didn't even know what to say "I understand that I hurt your feelings and I love fucking you but I love you more than just that" He said taking my hands "I can't, just not yet" I cracked out not looking at him.

"Please, I need you, I can't go on like this anymore, okay? I cant keep fucking you knowing I am not allowed to touch you if it's not sexual, if I can't kiss you, or hug you" He said as his voice broke at the end.

"Noah, you knew-" "I love you" He whispered, I looked at him "Don't" I sighed, I saw how the tears buildt up in his eyes.

"Don't what!?" He raised his voice "Don't say such things!" I yelled back "But I do, and they can all know!" He yelled "I can't have you loving me!" I yelled at him walking back in the cafe.

He ran behind me "Ava stop" he said once we were back at the table "Please" He whispered, I looked at him "I have told you, I dont want feelings" I said looking down.

"But you do have feelings for me, just like I have for you, if there really isn't anything you feel for me anymore look me into my eyes and tell me" He sighed, I kept looking down "Look me in the eyes, Ava" He snapped.

"You know I cant!" I looked at him "Why do you think I have sex with you? I want you! I will always want you but I need time!" I yelled at him making the whole cafe look at us, I forgot I was even in here.

"I can't give you time" Noah whispered "Then don't" I cracked out taking my things storming out the cafe.

Noah's P.O.V

"So it is true" Ed chuckled "Shut up" Justin warned him, as I was staring at her leave.

"Go after her" Lucas said touching my shoulder, but I couldn't even get him off of me, I couldn't yell at him to not touch me.

"I can't do this anymore" I cracked out "Dude, let's get him out of here" Justin said as they walked me out, I sat in my car at the steering wheel staring.

"He can't drive" Lucas said quietly "Fuck!" I yelled as I started to hit it "What did I do!?" I yelled as I felt the tears stream down my face, I hate this, I hate crying.

"Noah calm down, you're going to be okay" Lucas said touching my back "What the fuck did I do?" I cried out against my steering wheel "You told her the truth, she needed to hear it" Lucas whispered.

"I pushed her away, she is going to hate me, she deserves time, all the time she wants because I fucked up in the first place" I sniffled.

"Why am I even crying?" I groaned "Because you love her and you hurt her, it's okay" Justin assured me from the backseat.

"Isa went after her, she will be alright" Lucas assured me "I have to go see her" I whispered starting the engine of my car "Do you really think that's a good idea right now?" Lucas said, I nodded driving there.

Once I got there, I got out and ran to her dorm, I stormed in "I will give you time" I blurted out, I looked at her, she had red puffy eyes and Isa was sitting with her.

"Noah, you look like a mess" Isa said "Go" She said getting up "Dont you dare to kick me out" I warned her, she held her hands up.

"Baby" I cracked out sitting in front of her on my knees "I'm such a jackass, I will give you time, as much time as you need and I'm so sorry" I whispered looking at her, she looked at me.

"I'm using you, it's not fair" She cracked out "I don't care, I wasn't fair, I'm okay with you using me, use me, please just use me, okay?" I said putting my hand on her face, she whimpered leaning her face on my hand.

"It's not fair" She whispered "It's okay" I nodded pulling her into a hug, the first in forever.

I held her, tightly, making her feel safe because she hugged back immediately and relaxed in our hug, I sat with her on the bed snuggling my face in the crook of her neck holding her tighter.

"Just know that I love you too" She cried out.