The Fifteenth Year

February: Part 1

Love is not always roses, honey, and tea. Sometimes it is difficult being you, and sometimes it is difficult being me. And in the night if we are restless and our love struggles to make sense, know that I will fight for us. Because I love you, and I know that you love me.  - Courtney Peppernell

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Tuesday, February 1, 2005

Dear Friend,

Against my better judgment, I took Renee's advice and went to Jason's football practice. There weren't many people there at all. Just some school staff (adults) that probably figured me and my friends were just a couple of giggly girls trying to get some muscular guys to notice us. We sat in the bleachers on the front row and clapped whenever the team made some good catches, blocks, or gave each other a fight during their scrimmage. Watching Jason do up-downs and sprints at every whistle chime with Chris and Nathan made my heart palpitate. He really was ready for this as much as we always suspected he would be growing up. He looked focused and in his element. Despite his modesty, he was ready to be a pro athlete. I could feel it.

After Coach Palmer blew the final whistle, the guys all gave a groan of approval and high-fived each other. They seemed confident about the next game on Friday. That was when a teammate pointed us out to Jason. He turned and noticed us and my heart started pounding when he smiled and jogged over.

"He knows you're my neighbor," Jason said first to let me know our cover wasn't tarnished. Then he smiled at my friends. "Hey. Good to see you guys again."

"You too, Romeo," Renee said mischievously, earning an elbowing from Tessa.

"I met you once at her birthday party, right?" Jason asked Chloe. "I've known these two weirdos from her parties for years."

Chloe nodded. "Uh-huh."

"Chloe and I have become very good friends," I clarified.

Jason smiled at her. "Well, it's good to see you again. Hope these girls don't eat you alive."

"Oh whatever," Tessa said, making Jason laugh.

"So...what a pleasant surprise. I wasn't expecting anyone at a warm-up." Then he locked eyes with me. "Cassie hasn't been to any of my games."

"I didn't think you'd notice," I said with a nonchalant shrug.

"I did," he said lowly, not blinking once.

My hands felt clammy. Our gazes held firm.

My friends sensed the tension, it no doubt was probably awkward for them.

"Shit..." Renee murmured under her breath in surprise at the sudden heat between us causing Tessa to erupt in uncontrollable giggles. That's the thing about Renee. No filter.

I blushed deep red. And Jason chuckled. "Hey, she's right." Then he looked to my friends for support. "You guys wouldn't mind if I talked to her a few minutes alone, would you?"

"Have her back in time for dinner," Renee said with a smile.

Then just like that, my friends were gone.

"So what are you doing here all of a sudden?" he asked, and not in a mean way.

"I missed you?" I answered, embarrassed.

He looked like he was trying not to smile. "Let's go somewhere less open and talk," he said finally.

"What about your shower? And doesn't your coach have to talk to everyone?"

He nodded. "I'll be fifteen minutes tops. Will you wait for me?"

"Where should we meet?"

"Back behind the coach's office, that little separate building looking towards that cornfield. He never goes over there. We won't be seen."

"Conners! Come on!" a teammate shouted as the Lakota Lions were trudging towards the locker room.

"See you soon," he said to me before jogging off.

Sure enough, fifteen minutes later, he looked all around to make sure nobody was near, and met me at the spot.

"There you are," I said cheerily. "You guys looked awesome out there. No wonder you're undefeated."

He didn't answer me. Instead he cupped my face in his rough hands and kissed me long and soft. I was startled, but that doesn't mean I didn't go with it.

"I'm really glad you're here," he told me when he pulled away. "I really missed you, Cassie. Not  being able to see you since our date has been torture."

I beamed shyly. "Really?"

"Hasn't it for you?"

"Of course! But we agreed we needed to be discreet. Ugh, maybe this is a bad idea. Maybe we should start telling people. We'll never be able to keep this up. Lakota is a small town."

"Why did we agree to wait again?" he asked, massaging my shoulders and planting a soft kiss on my neck.

"Because we were exploring us," I breathed, giving him a playful shove.

"I'm done exploring. This is the happiest I've been in...ever. And I know what I want."

My heart couldn't have soared any higher. "Me too."

"So who should we tell first? Your parents or mine?"

I sighed and wrung my hands.

"What?" he asked.

"Jason...it's only been one date. And we're moving a little fast. Trust me, this is exactly what I want."

"You're right. I'm sorry if I pressured you."

I shook my head quickly. "No. You didn't. I want to tell them soon too. Parents don't like it when their kids' relationships progress quickly and our situation is even more complicated. I say we tell them soon, but to just give it a little more time. It's only been a couple weeks."

He nodded his agreement but he looked disappointed.

"What?" I asked, grabbing his hand. "What is it?"

He smiled bashfully. "Nothing. It's just... I was sorta hoping to be able to take my girlfriend out for Valentine's Day."

Gah...could he be any more perfect?