A ROAD TO YOUR HEART

THE GIRL BEHIND THE MASK.

Nene POV:

I woke up with the sound of the alarm clock. It felt like I was dying. The sound was terrifying and I had to always wake up with that deadly sound.

Today felt like every other day.
Wake up, eat, do a little chore then sleep again.

Nothing ever happens.

I can't go anywhere; i am locked in doors for days... Don't worry I have been counting, it is just day 24.

Chioma is gone and so is Tunde.
The two people that gave my life meaning.
He promised to call; but he didn't.

So right now am a married woman and an expecting mother.

An expecting mother...

A mother...

A single mother; I feel rejected and all alone in this.

But I have two families to cater for my well being. But they don't really care, no one have even asked me lately if am okay.

Cause am not; am not okay.

I laid still on my bed, as I felt tears escape my eye lid and stain my pillow. I always cry alone but end up smiling through out the whole day.

I am scared. I am scared I will be alone after all this.

That wasn't even the only frustrating thing about my life... I feel like I need to be quiet so I wouldn't get on the bad side of my mum.

I can't even breath well, I can't sleep well... And with this I turned around and stared at the ceiling. "Are you okay?." I asked myself over and over again.

As I cried silently

The silence of this house is very frustrating... I feel like am in a prison.

I angrily removed the blanket off my naked skin, I stood up and walked towards my closet as I opened it and removed my favorite gown.

I wore the dress and my flip flop slippers and made my way out of room and walked straight downstairs.

I didn't stop, even when i heard a group of people giggling, curiosity didn't get the best of me this time. I opened the front door and walked outside.

The thin air blew my yellow chiffon gown, and sent chills down my spine. I breath in the air; like as if it was the last time I would ever breath oxygen ever again.

I left my hair unbrushed and somehow I loved the feeling of looking like a mad person.

I felt good.

****

I decided I would walk by every place I never went to around my area.

All those areas I condemned cause I didn't believe in them. Or judged it by the people who lived there.

I finally realized that money wasn't everything. Maybe sometime true love and happiness is all we need.

I have found myself in the mist of beggars now.

How will I raise my child up; will he/she grow up like those children who just passed beside me running around with dirty pant and rolling those dirty tires.

Or will my child grow up, like I did. Who will I be after this?.

Tunde is out there now; fulfilling his dream while I will stuck here with his baby, that he said he isn't ready for.

What kind of mother will I even become.

Suddenly my legs stopped moving and my eyes caught something far more beautiful than I had assumed.

"The church..." I whispered and memories ran through my head.

I remembered those times when we were still living with my Dad and every Sunday we would drive to church... HAPPILY.

We were once happy in the church. There was once a time that the name of the Lord brought me joy.

It has been a long time since I went to church. I just felt like the church was a family thing... Something we did as a family.
Ever since we separated I never had the need to ever go back there ever again.

"Don't walk away, enter." Someone said behind me, causing me to shiver in fear... I quickly turned around.

"Nonso?." I asked.

"Yea..." He said while his smile grew longer.

"What are you doing here?." I asked again.
"Waiting to enter." He said and i smiled in return and looked away, staring back at the church.

"Come on, enter with me." He said.

"I can't..." I whispered and he walked closer to me, he stood in front of me.

Somehow deep inside that dark eyes, where hidden emotions.
Emotions he always hid.

Better than me I guess.

"I am sad..." He said.

"Why?." I asked him and he smiled. "Cause I am scared..." He said.

"Scared about what?." I asked again.

"I might kill myself..." He said and this time I smiled. "Stop joking about stupid things Nonso."

"I am a loser!... A fucking loser..." this time tears escaped his eyes; my heart melted. "You aren't a loser Nonso." I said, while tears threatened to escape my eyes again.

"I can't do anything right, this is my third time of seating for this exam and I keep failing. I feel like am still where I am 3 years ago and am annoyed and I am scared that I would give up on myself. Just like every other person ."

"Nonso..." I said while I felt my cheeks get wet from my tears flowing down. "So please come with me... Cause I don't really want to be alone." He said and somehow I felt like we were both in the same situation,

A situation we needed each other comfort.

"Okay, let us go. Let us go inside together."

I said with a smile, a smile I had to force.

Just like every other day, living behind a Mask.