Unintentionally Bared (18+) ✔

Chapter Twelve

Issacs POV

Trees whirled past me as Andy raced down the road. Slamming his foot on the gas he sent me flying back against my seat. My eyes couldn't focus on anything. My mind was lost. With every twist and turn of the road my stomach threatened to explode. I braced myself against the dashboard begging God to release me from this misery.

"Don't you dare fucking hurl in my car." Andy states while easing off the gas slightly to turn left. My blood felt like it was boiling in my veins, I didn't ask to fucking leave. I'm okay.

"Then pull over or slow the fuck down." I screamed at him. The angry look on his face pissed me off even more. I wanted to slice his throat open and watch him bleed. I punched myself against the skull trying to control my unwelcome thoughts. He is my best friend, don't hurt him. Repeatedly I slammed my fist against my temple until I couldn't remember why I began in the first place. Where were we going? Why have we stopped? The side of my head throbbed painfully but I welcomed it with sweet relief. My heart beat was inconsistent, slamming against my chest one minute while barley beating the next. I suddenly felt too warm like I was suffocating from the inside out. I needed air. Suddenly the passenger side door opened, and Andy began pulling me from the car. The abrupt movement unsettled me. Why couldn't I focus! Where's Jessica?

My head was spinning out of control, I gripped it hard trying to slow it down, but nothing worked. I tried to focus on my breathing in and out in and out. I glanced up from my kneeling state and found Andy staring at me. Without a word he helped me up and I leaned on him, letting him carry most of my weight. The sound of an elevator arriving started me out of my zombie state and I instantly lost it. I left her! I didn't mean to fucking leave her! My heart shatters as images of Jessica's sad face flashes through my mind. I push Andy to the ground and bolt to the door as fast as I can. I need to get to her. I need her. I can't breathe. The wind is knocked out of me as I'm tackled to the cold ground, Andy's weight crushing me, holding me in place.

"Isaac listen to me. Don't let her see you like this. Let me help you." Andy starts but I can't, and I don't want to either. I try to desperately crawl out from underneath him but he easily over powers me, dragging me into the elevator. I sit with my back against the corner, watching the numbers slowly rise to my floor. I don't want to be home, I want to be with Jessica. When the elevator opens on my floor, I struggle getting up. I glance in Andy's direction daring him to touch me. He understands immediately and walks over to keep the doors from slamming closed.

What felt like an eternity later we finally entered my loft. I started to relax when my mind registers the familiar surroundings. Andy shut and locked the door behind us, instantly running down the hallway. I stumbled into my living room flopping down on the couch, I stared at the ceiling, fascinated by the way it moved. I rolled off on to the hardwood floor causing pain to radiate through my body. I hurt everywhere but I felt surprisingly comfortable and my eyes started to drift close. Before I could blink, Andy was hovering over me with a glass of water and a hand full of pills in his hand. My stomach turned at the thought of swallowing and I began to gag. The luke warm river was endlessly pouring from my mouth, choking me. I clung to Andy's ankle as I emptied my stomach upon the oakwood floor. I clawed at him, desperate for air. Andy lifted me off the ground leading me down the hall into the bathroom. He turned on the shower and pushed me inside, slamming the door in my face. The icy water shocked my skin, my muscles were freezing against my bones. I stood there letting the water drench me, my clothing becoming heavy as it stuck to my skin.

"Take them." Andy stated handing me two oval shaped pills above the shower door. I slowly grabbed them from his hand and placed them on my tongue. Swallowing felt impossible, my throat was so dry the pills scraped against my throat. I leaned my head back and opened my mouth, letting the water ease them down.

My body started to shiver as the water poured down on me. I could hear nothing over the shattering of my teeth. I needed Jessica's warmth. I needed her to hold me. Andy yanked open the glass door, startling me from my thoughts. Turning off the water he handed me a towel and stepped out of the bathroom. I stripped of my wet clothing in the shower and left it there, stepping out I notice a pair of grey pajama pants and a blue t-shirt. Hastily I dried myself and threw on my clothes, urgent for warmth. My mind was becoming clearer and my body started to calm. I found Andy in my kitchen making a bagel, I watched him silently. My episode was at the forefront of my mind. I felt humiliated.

"Andy I'm so sor-" I began.

"Dude. Don't worry about it, it happens." He says smirking immediately putting me at ease. He places the cream cheese bagel on a plate and slides it across the counter to me. "Eat something, you'll feel better." I send him a weak smile as I lift the bagel to my mouth, my dry lips splitting open as I take a bite. My medicine was slowly dissolving in my stomach helping me, healing me. I barely finished half of my food before exhaustion took over. I laid my head against the counter trying to self sooth. I miss Jessica so much.

"Does Jessica know I didn't intend to leave her?" I ask without lifting my head.

"I called Alexander, he said he would take care of her." Relief floods me. He was a kind, caring soul. Always living up to everyone's expectations of him. Always putting others before himself. I envied my father. I aspired to be him.

"Thank you," I whisper. My throat cracks as I try to hold back my tears. I hated my mother for what she's doing to this family, to my father. I watch a piece of his soul die every time her name is spoken. He loves her with everything that is and in return she spits in his face. He gave her everything her heart desired, but nothing was ever good enough. Uncontrollable sobs escape me as my medicine tries to level out. Andy rushed over patting my back gently as I try to regain power over myself.

"It's okay buddy. Here drink some water." He says running over to grab a glass from the cabinet and filling it at the sink. As soon as the glass slides against my fingers I tilt the glass up and chug.

"More please."

We repeat this several times until my throat doesn't feel like sand paper. I must have thanked him a thousand times as he helps me into bed. How could I be so careless? How could I have forgotten to take the pills? I felt deflated as I settled into bed, clinging to my pillow wishing it was her.

"I'll be in the living room. Wake me up if you need me." Andy says shutting the door behind him. I was grateful to have him, he was truly irreplaceable. Andy was accustomed to my outbursts and he knew how to handle me. It was rarely this bad, but tonight the liquor fueled me. Jessica was heavy on my mind. I will make this up to her, I'll make her forgive me for leaving her behind. I missed her so fucking much. Depression consumed me in my loneliness as my mind drifted off into darkness.