#81 Destiel - I Missed You

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Request from @IamDonnie. I hope this is what you asked for!

There will be some Sabriel. Gabriel is alive and all that. Plus, I am not writing this from the script.

Dean's p.o.v:

Dean watched as Lucifer killed the love of his life. Castiel's eyes and mouth were glowing from the grace that was dying. He was dying. Lucifer twisted the blade and then took it out.
"No!" Dean yelled. Dean watched as Cas fell to the ground. Everything hit Dean all at once. The memories, the laughter, the kisses, and the tears.

~flashback~

"Dean, s-stop!" Cas yelled as Dean tickled him. Who knew angels were ticklish? Dean smiled widely at the adorable laugh that protruded from Cas's vocal chords.
"Make me!" Dean said enthusiastically. Cas forcefully, but softly, pushed Dean away. Cas stared at him with bright and happy eyes. Dean's smile never wavered nor disappear. When he was with Cas, it seemed as if it was only them in the world. No one else mattered. Of course, there was Sam. He mattered, but he wasn't usually at the bunker. He was always going on trips with Gabriel. Cas smiled softly before leaning towards Dean and pressing his lips to Dean's soft, fanfiction like ones. Dean pulled Cas closer to him yet it seemed like that wasn't enough. Dean place one of his hands on the small of Cas's back and tangled the other in his dark brown hair. (Some people say its black, but I think otherwise) Soon enough, Dean had to break away to breathe again.
"I love you." He whispered.
"I love you, too." Cas replied quietly.

~flashback over~

Dean remembered the first fight he had with Cas. It still haunted Dean to this day because that could have been the end of him and Castiel.

~flashback~

"Why can't you just be more careful, Dean?" Cas asked calmly. Dean glared at his boyfriend in anger.
"I was being careful! You know, sometimes you can be way too clingy and overbearing! Sometimes I wish I wasn't with you!" Dean yelled. That was a lie though. Dean didn't mean that. He loved how Cas could sometimes be bossy or clingy. He never wished he wasn't with Cas, but Dean was mad. And when he was mad, he said things he didn't mean. But it doesn't stop the other person from getting hurt.
"You really wish that?" Cas asked softly? Dean felt slightly guilty, but his anger seemed more important.
"Yes, actually, I do!" Dean responded. Dean saw tears building in Cas's eyes. Soon enough, the dam broke. It was like a waterfall.
"Well, I'm sorry about that. Maybe you just need space. M-maybe I need to leave for a while. Yeah, I'll do that." Cas said and then disappeared. It was as if Dean's anger had vanished; melted all together. Dean finally realized what he had done. He hurt Cas.
"Oh, my God. What have I done?" He whispered. Dean was disgusted with himself. He needed to apologize.
'Cas? Angel, I'm sorry. I'm so so sorry. I- I was angry. I didn't- Cas, I didn't mean it. I was lying. I never ever wish I wasn't with you. Not even a little. Please come back. Come home. Please.' Dean prayed. Hours passed and Cas still hadn't come back. Dean had been drinking his pain away. Just like he always did. Dean lied on his bed, drinking a big bottle of whiskey, probably his 4th bottle, with his lights turned off. He didn't want to feel anything anymore. Dean took another gulp of whiskey when he heard fluttering. He couldn't tell if it was Gabriel or Cas.
"Dean?" A familiar voice called quietly. It was Cas. Dean took another big drink of his whiskey, finishing it, before sitting up and looking at Cas. Dean's brows furrowed.
"I didn't- Cas, I feel- I feel so horrible." Dean said. His words were slurred and sounded like a bunch of baby talk, but Cas knew what he was saying.
"I know, Dean. It's-" Dean stopped Cas.
"Don't say it's okay because it's not. It's not okay. I hurt- Cas, I hurt you. I'm a disgusting, horrible, stupid human being for doing that." Dean said. Dean had tears falling down his face. Cas walked over to him and wiped away Dean's tears with his thumb.
"That is not true, Dean Winchester. You just got mad. I forgive you. You are not a disgusting, horrible, stupid human being. You are one of the most amazing humans I know. Your soul shines brighter than any other soul in this world. Your soul shines brighter than any star in any universe. I love you and nothing will change that." Cas said. Dean sniffled before shaking his head.
"I hurt you." He whispered. Cas pulled Dean up and wrapped his arms around him.
"I forgive you. Yes, you hurt me, but it was not intentional, therefore making it easy for me to forgive you." Cas responded. Dean didn't say anything else. He'd make it up to his boyfriend.
"I love you, too, Cas." He whispered. Cas just squeezed him in comfort.
"I know, Dean." Cas said.

~flashback over~

Dean knelt beside his lovers body with tears streaming down his face.
"I'm so sorry, Cas. I'm so sorry. It's my fault. It's all my fault." Dean whispered.

Weeks later

Dean stared at his old lover. Jack, who was beside him, was smiling. He was happy Cas was back.
"C-Cas? I thought-" Dean couldn't even finish. Cas seemed angry.
"I know. I was dead and now I'm not. Did you sell your soul? How long do you have?" He asked. Dean's brow furrowed.
"I didn't sell my soul. I don't know how you- Wait." Dean looked at Jack. Jack looked down, probably feeling ashamed.
"I thought that if I did something good, you'd finally stop hating me." He said quietly. Dean sighed.
"Thank you, Jack. This means a lot." Dean said. Jack looked up with a small smile. Dean smiled back before walking over to Cas. Cas smiled and pressed his lips to Dean's. Dean remembered the first time they met. Cas's entrance was badass and had an effect on Dean. Dean fell in love the moment that Cas tried to talk to him even though he had no idea what Cas looked like. Dean played hard to get for weeks before Cas grew on him and then it took months to admit his feelings to Cas. When Dean had finally confessed his feelings Cas just smiled and then pressed his lips to Dean's. This moment was exactly like when Dean had first spilled his feelings to Cas. Now here they were; reunited. Together again and hell, maybe they'd raise Jack together. Dean broke away with a small gasp.
"I missed you." He whispered. Cas placed his forehead to Dean's and smiled.
"I missed you, too." Cas whispered back. Dean was happy again, but now they have to figure out how to deal with Jack. Keep him from hurting anymore, but training him to use his powers carefully and only when needed. This ought to be a fun ride.

A/N:

If this isn't what you wanted, I will rewrite it to you expectations!

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