A life of Payne (1D/5SOS) *HEAVEY EDITING*

The great unknown

Niall's POV

I watched as Katie and Calum shared one last hug before she skipped off stage with her life sized teddy bear and roses.

The sad thing is I knew that Calum was planning that, everyone knew but Katie so I don't understand why I was so shocked with Katie's reaction. Any girl would fall head over heals with him if he did that for her and including the fact of how close and cuddly they were before the show then I really don't understand why I'm shocked.

Whenever I see them together and all cuddled up like in the dressing room earlier, all I can think about is how that could have been me if I didn't blow things out of proportion at the Cabin on New Years.

If only I didn't tell her I wanted to go back to being friends.

If only I didn't show up to Zayn's birthday with another girl.

And most importantly if only I didn't scare her in my car because now she thinks that I would actually hit her if I was angry and no man in their right mind should lay a hand on Katie in that way which is why I didn't try anything else in the car a week ago.

I didn't try to say sorry or tell her that I would never hit her because I knew she wouldn't listen to me and I didn't want to upset her more and now I have totally left it to long and can't mention it now without ruining Katie's night. No matter how jealous of those two I am right now I would never ruin what they have on the same day it happened. It would be nice enough for me to wait until at least valentines day when I know Calum won't be around. Not that I'm saying I'm going to ruin it or anything but technically speaking they are not an official couple so I still have a chance to redeem myself.

I moved away from the side of the stage as Katie walked further off the stage. I couldn't be around her without wanting her in my arms but how can I even think like that when I'm the one that hurt her feelings in the first place and nearly hit her. I'm not even sure what came over me when we were in the car that day but the fact that she still talks about her old family like they love her dearly and are trying everything to get her back is just bullshit. Not to mention that was the first day I saw Katie and Calum all happy in each others arms.

"You okay mate?" Liam asked as he came and stood next to me as we both watched Katie and Ashley giggle like five year old girls over the teddy bear and talk about how cute Calum was. It made me want to literally be sick.

"If I say I'm fine are you going to keep questioning me?" I turned to look at him and just saw him shrug his shoulders and keep his eyes on Katie. He had a look of pure joy in his eyes just by seeing Katie that happy. He is honestly an amazing big brother to Katie, who knew he would ever be so responsible for someone else besides himself.

"That should have been me, you know that right?" He finally turned to look at me and sighed before talking.

"You had a chance Ni, but you didn't make her that happy." He pointed towards Katie as he talked as she smiled and smelled the bunch of roses in her tiny hands.

"It's not to late. I can be like that too! I am like that I just need to prove it." He walked away from me without another word.

Liam walked over to Katie and hugged her before he walked to the side of the stage to watch the rest of the concert. Katie placed her teddy bear down as well as the flowers before turning and seeing me look at her. She gave me a quick and very small smile before dropping her gaze away from me and walking to the side of the stage as well. She seemed so stiff and awkward when she was looking at me, I needed a way for her to no longer be scared of me.

By the time the concert had finished it was around nine but it was easy to tell that everyone was tired so I doubt we will be going out tonight and Katie and Ashley don't really go out in public that much because Liam is scared that they will be attacked so I knew that Liam and the girls would be going straight home.