Pretending (A Calum Hood Fan Fiction)

Chapter 63: Him

I sat awkwardly at the edge of my bed, trying to figure out why am I here, all locked up in my own room, when everyone else is partying downstairs. I was never into parties, not unless my friends would force me too. Today, I turned a year older. I had it all planned weeks ago on how I would spend my birthday, but things went on their different ways. Madison had me ended up deciding to throw a house party, since my parents are away and my sister's busy at Uni. I really don't understand why I said yes to that suggestion, but I said it anyway. I was really never into parties; they make me feel uncomfortable. All you'd see are people getting drunk, and mess everywhere. I don't get the point of it. Maybe this is why I'm here inside my room, not even minding to go downstairs.

I stood up and walked closer to my mirror. I felt the need to look at myself for no particular reason. I stared and focused on my reflection. Although it's my birthday, I didn't put too much effort on what I have to wear. I honestly don't care. Black sweater, black jeans, black converse. I am all settled and I feel comfortable. There is no way I'm going to dress up like a fancy asswipe for a fucked up birthday party.

I turned to look at my face. I look tired. My face looks dark, and my lips remained forming a straight thin line. I ran a hand through my hair as I let out a sigh. I haven't even done anything these past few days, yet I look like I just ran a thousand miles. I don't know what has gotten into me. I always let fucked up things defeat me in a short period of time. I feel like I haven't been eating. I look exhausted, I look sad. I don't know. Things have been really fucked up.

I took my phone out of my pocket and checked the time, informing me that it's half past ten in the evening already. I sighed for no reason, running a hand again on my thick black hair. I felt the sudden urge of going downstairs. I feel way better inside here but I guess I need to check things up down there and might as well try to have some fun. This is my party, I should never forget. Maybe my friends are already down there too. I could use some company to get rid of all the stupid thoughts inside my head.

The blaring sound of heavy music and the familiar scent of alcohol and cigarette welcomed me as I walk my way downstairs. My house is filled completely with people from my school, and it kind of pisses me off to see some faces that I am not even familiar with. I want to go back upstairs and check if the rooms are locked, but I ignored the thought and kept walking. I didn't mind locking mine. Maybe in about five minutes I would go back up in there. I'm not really feeling the party vibe.

I remained walking, not even minding anyone who wishes me a "happy birthday". I don't even know them, and I don't care. I took one of the red cups filled with beers and took a shot. Taking just one shot won't be bad, but I don't have any plans of getting drunk. The last time I was badly smashed, it was proven that I have done something that I can't even believe I would. I rolled my eyes and took another shot of my drink. Fucked up memories. This isn't the right time to flood my head. Or maybe there's no time to make me remember. I don't want it all inside my head.

My body stopped from walking at the sight of a familiar face. Chris Meathers. I knew he would be here, even though I didn't even invited him. He has this stupid habit of crashing parties. He was grinning and dancing while holding a red cup, obviously looking for someone he could get on with. I laughed and suddenly realized he was keeping me amused. He threw his cup out of nowhere when a girl fell in front of him. Alas for you Chris, you've found someone. He helped her up and started grinding on her back. I started laughing again. The girl is not even enjoying the whole situation, obviously. The girl turned around and started shouting on his face, making the grin fade away on my mouth. My eyes widened, whole body tensed up.

Pink tips.

I wanted to look away, but I can't help but set my eyes on her. Within seconds, her eyes met mine, locking our gazes. My heart started beating faster that I couldn't even hear anything anymore except it. I swallowed hard the feeling of a big lump forming in my throat as she started walking closer. Those eyes, those lips, that hair...