Pretending (A Calum Hood Fan Fiction)

Chapter 10: Her

Yesterday wasn't really a good one, but it's not far from being the same with every single day I've had. I don't want to think anything about what happened yesterday but it keeps on popping inside my head, especially the incident at lunch time. I am used of having people bad mouthing me all the time, and I really don't care about it because I never let it get into me. But yesterday turned out to be somehow different. I couldn't stop thinking about it. What made me bother the most is that why I waited for Calum to defend me from everyone in there especially from his friends? I mean, I know I don't mean anything to him, so if he just ignore me every time this thing happens it should always be just okay. But why did I suddenly get my hopes up? I got my heart broken in there for some reasons. I waited for him to stand up and just grab me and ran off without saying anything. Who am I kidding? I shouldn't be expecting things like that to happen. We can never mean something to each other. I should never forget that we are only just pretending.

I skated my way to school this morning with my music on my earphones turned up so loud. It's my own way of unwinding and putting myself up into a good mood. When I finally got into the gates, I was expecting that Calum won't be there waiting for me but he's there standing, listening to music as well.

I took my time to look at him before coming closer to talk to him. He's wearing a gray sweater paired with black skinny jeans and a black high cut converse. He's wearing a red beanie as well that made him look even better. Did I just say that? Well yeah, I think I just checked Calum out. He looks good today and I don't know, I found myself smiling before coming up to him.

He removed his earphones off of his ears and smiled at me as he saw me coming near to him. I smiled back at him like nothing happened yesterday.

"Morning." He said. This is the first time he greeted me.

"Same." I'm not used to this kind of stuff.

"I thought you're not gonna show up." He stated, looking at my skateboard. 

I smirked. "Me either."

"So you skate?" He asked and I just lifted my shoulders and looked at him, making it obvious. He chuckled lightly.

After minutes of silence while walking, Calum decided to bring up yesterday.

"Hey uhm, I'm really sorry for... for yesterday." He stuttered as he rub the back of his neck.

I bit my lip as my find myself being nervous about him saying sorry in front me. I don't want to talk about this anymore. 

"Let's just forget about it." I stated and half smiled at him, making my way to my locker and he followed.

"So, catch up later?" He asked.

"Yeah sure." I replied, gathering all my stuff. 

"See you, Kristen."

I looked at him as he walk away and smiled. This day started off pretty fine for the both of us, and I hope it would end just like how it started.


*


The bell startled me when it started ringing, alarming everyone that it's lunch time already. My stomach started making weird noises and by that I know I have to grab something to eat. I haven't had anything since last night and that wasn't enough to keep me alive until tonight. I'm not really in the mood to eat but I have to get myself something to fill my stomach. Maybe I should get an apple or something.

I made my way to the cafeteria and suddenly got stuck in my tracks as the memories of yesterday started flashing back inside my head. What if Chris sees me there? What if he grabs me again and lock me up inside a room where no one would hear me? What if Stacey is out there gathering her plans on how she'd bitch me out again? I don't want to cause another scene again today so I'll just find another way on getting myself something to eat.

I turned around and to my surprise, Calum is standing in front of me. I just looked at him with the 'what' look evident on my face.

"You're gonna come in there?" He asked, not looking at me but trying look inside the cafeteria.

"I uh- I'll just get something to eat." I uttered, looking down.

"Follow me." Calum commanded and without a doubt I followed him. I don't know what he's up to but because I'm not in the zone to find things out right now because I'm really starving, I just did what he asked me to do. We got at the back of the school and he sat down under a tree in there, gesturing me to sit down so I did.

"Why are we here?" I asked him, looking at the two paper bags he placed on the grass. 

"We're eating lunch." He replied as he took out the food inside the bags. My stomach started making weird noises again and Calum must have heard it because he looked at me grinning. It was so embarrassing. 

"Get your part and enjoy the food. It's my treat today." He stated while he took a bite on his burger and I did the same. I really eat a lot and Calum doesn't look so surprised anymore since he had seen me eat a pizza before.

In the middle of eating our lunch, Calum started speaking again.

"So I was thinking..." He paused.

"Chinking wha?" I replied with my mouth still full. He chuckled at me.

"You haven't seen me and my band play yet, right?" He continued.

"Yeah." I replied. 

He took his last bite and finished his drink before he continued.

"I was thinking maybe uhm, yo-you can come to our rehearsals later after school at uhm- at Ashton's?" He asked, stuttering.

Why is he stuttering?

About this whole thing, in all honesty I want to come and see him play. I haven't seen him play before and now I'm flooded with wonders. But I couldn't just show up in there just because they know that Calum and I are dating. I don't want to be a distraction, just in case Stacey's there too. I might bang the drums using her head.

I finished my burger before replying to Calum. He's obviously waiting for my answer. 

"Oh uhm, I can't come." I said, looking at him. He frowned. Why?

"Oh. Why? Busy?" He asked with a tone of disappointment. 

Why is he acting weird?

"No, not at all. You guys must really focus on what you're rehearsing and if I come there with you, Stacey might come too and another bullshit might happen again so I'll just stay at home instead." I stated, making him say 'oh' and the smile came back to his face.

"Maybe I can come over some other time." I added. "Your friends aren't that assholes like you." 

He laughed at my statement and I joined in. 

Here we are again, bantering with confusion flying all over the air. 


*


I flopped down on my bed the moment I got home. Calum and I didn't go out today because he has band rehearsals, and I've got nothing to do with my life other than homeworks so I just decided to head home and think of what to do. 

I lie down for minutes and got up to get changed into the most comfortable clothes I have. Nothing is bothering me at the moment since my parents aren't screaming at each other today and my father is not around. I went to my bookshelf and realized I have read all the books I have in there for a hundred times already so I need to come up with some other thing to do. I went to my table and grabbed my laptop which I barely use and went back to bed and logged in again to Facebook after a million years. 

When my profile signed in, I have two notifications and two friend requests. I checked the notifications and they were from my relatives, inviting me to play Candy Crush Saga. I laughed and rolled my eyes. I ignored and went to the requests. There were two, and they're from Calum and his friend Luke Hemmings. After confirming them both, I grinned at the thought of going on to Calum's profile and stalk for a bit. Since he added me, I guess it's not too bad to look at his stuffs in there, right? And plus they're not private. So I can look at it. What could be in there? I'll see for myself.

I clicked his profile with his profile picture of him, holding two puppies. He must really like them. His cover photo is a picture of him with his band, looking like... I don't know. Too much hair. His latest status says "Fucked up day. But it ended sorted out though :p". I immediately thought it was about yesterday. I remembered how I laughed at him texting me over and over again just to forgive him. What the hell, Calum. 

I clicked on the photos and started looking at each. I clicked at the first album that says 'At Luke's :D' and saw pictures of him with his group of popular friends. Stacey's fake extensions appeared and I immediately closed the picture. I hate seeing her face. I went to another album and another, until I got into the last album which has 'Old Pics' name. I clicked it and there were few pictures in the album. There's this picture that he really looked stupid sticking his tongue out while doing the peace sign. And there's this one too that he's riding an elephant sort of statue, and he's really small. I kept laughing on how funny he looked like when he was younger. He's so skinny and small unlike now. I got into the last thee pictures and there's this one where he's carrying Luke and they both look stupid, and cute. The next one, he must be around 11 or 12, based on how he looked like. He's holding his guitar and the picture's caption is 'my baby'. I don't know why but I laughed at it. 

The last picture was a picture of him at the park, with his sister, mom and dad they looked so happy together. I looked at the picture for so long, that I hadn't noticed that tears started falling from my eyes. I wish I have something like this. I envy Calum for almost having everything in life. He has friends who's always hanging out with him, no one bullies him, he can have everything he likes, and most of all, he has a happy family. 

He's happy. He is very happy. And dragging him into my life is just so cruel for me to do. 

I closed my laptop and placed it on the bedside table. It's just 6 pm, but I have nothing to do other than to sleep.