Pretending (A Calum Hood Fan Fiction)

Chapter 12: Her

I didn't go to school today. For the last two weeks, I've been really active in school. I have stopped skipping classes and I always finish my home works in time. If I have to thank someone for this, it would be Calum. If it wasn't because him, I wouldn't do home works or I'd still be skipping classes. Not that I'm saying that Calum's the real reason behind it all. I just have to do his home works so by that I'll get to do mine too, and I have to give it to him and that causes me to come to classes. It's really unbelievable and ridiculous but yes, Calum is the main reason why I haven't skipped classes for weeks. But not today. I just don't want to go. I have my reasons anyway. First, my bed is so warm and cozy and I really can't get rid of it. Second, I don't want to deal with stupid people today. And lastly, I'm just really lazy to get up. I guess I am now considered as the most irresponsible person in the universe. But hey, school is really lame and if you tell me you like everything about school, there's a hundred percent chance that I might actually hate you.

It's been an hour since my alarm went off, but I'm still on my bed with my eyes still closed. I still want to drift in a deep slumber but my head doesn't want to anymore. I am wide awake and giddy inside but my body doesn't even feel like moving even just a single nerve. I feel so tired when I haven't even done anything yesterday. My bed feels like heaven and I couldn't let myself go. Maybe I should try to sleep again.

After an hour my eyes opened. I grabbed my phone somewhere beneath my sheets and checked the time. It's almost lunch time and I smiled at the fact that I'm still in bed. I looked at my screen and I have four messages from Calum. I ignored it and turned my phone off. I chucked it back the sheets, not caring about almost everything at all again. I want to let myself have this day on my own. I don't have anything in mind that bothers me. I just need some time alone.

After a little battle with myself about getting up or going back to sleep, I got up and took a shower. It was probably the best shower I've had in a long time. I covered my body and went out to get to my dresser. I took a sweater and a pair of jeans, convinced about my choice of outfit. I applied a bit of make up like I usually do. I blow dried my hair and left it untied, as usual. After getting ready, I grabbed my phone and wallet and took one last look on my mirror. I just sighed, and half smiled. I'm going out on my own today.

I decided to go to the mall first to buy some stuff. I haven't been on a shopping for a long time and I admit I kind of miss it. I really don't buy shit loads of stuff since I'm really not into girly things. I bought a new pair of jeans, some shirt, and some things I need as a lady. I headed next to McDonalds, and smiled like an idiot at the thought of eating there all by myself. I ordered fries and nuggets with a large coke. I just sat at the table at the corner and ate with pleasure. I just love food more than anything else and nothing can change that. Except for Rian Dawson, maybe?

Aside from skating and music, I love to read as well. Right after having a great time at Maccas, I headed to the nearest bookstore to get a new book or maybe I can get at least five if there are any new books that are worth reading. I went to the fictional section and started searching for the good ones. I have picked three books, two from John Green and there's this book who really got my attention and it's from David Levithan.

After having a long walk going nowhere, I ended up at Starbucks. I took my new book out after getting myself a coffee and settled down the table near the window. "This is where Calum and I had our first kiss." I thought to myself. I wonder how's him doing today.

I decided to read 'Everyday' first because it really got my attention. Within an hour of reading, I already feel sorry about A's life. It's so heartbreaking and tragic to fall in love with someone when you know you're waking up in a different body everyday. He managed to fall in love with Rhiannon no matter how tough and hard he's going through. I guess that's just what love can do to a person. You can do things you never thought you'd be able to do just to have what you want. You'll fight for what you think is right, even if it's completely wrong.

Love. I have never even thought about that until now. Love. What does love can really do to a person? I have never felt this kind of feeling and I'm not even planning to. They say that it changes people. It can make someone happy. But I couldn't see the point of it. If it can change people, and if it can make someone happy, then why is my family like this? My father is devastated about everything in his life. My mother is broken. And me? I don't know. I'm a mess. After all I've been through in life, I never wanted to give myself a chance anymore. There can be a lot of ways to be happy. Falling in love with someone is just not on my list.

I placed a piece of tissue on the page I decided to stop reading and closed my book. I looked outside and it's almost dark. I realized I've been out almost the whole day, and I just smiled at it. I gave myself some time and I liked it. I wish I could just do this everyday, but of course I had to learn and it sucks but there's nothing I can do about it.

I took my phone out and turned it on. It's been off the whole day but I'm not even bothered about it. I mean, who would text me?

After a few seconds, it went on and I just got confused of what appeared on my screen.

I have 27 messages from Calum.

I guess I am.... dead?

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Happy 2nd anniversary to 5 Seconds Of Summer! :)