Pretending (A Calum Hood Fan Fiction)

Chapter 41: Him

Author's Note: I highly recommend that you should listen to "While The World Let Go" by A Rocket To The Moon while reading this chapter! You can find the song at the right side if you're on your computer!

**********************************

I grabbed my black sweater that was lying on my bedroom floor and rushed outside. I held my phone tight as I started running out of nowhere, hoping that I would get another message but this time, I want it to be something detailed. I am confused about everything that is happening, but I still went out. I don't know what happened and I'm terribly worried. I know I shouldn't see her but here I am searching. I stopped on my tracks as I keep on looking around. I glanced back at the message on my phone.

"I need you."

Kristen. All I could think about is Kristen. Something happened. she wouldn't be like this if nothing happened. I started running again, without even knowing where to go. I tried to call her but she won't answer, so I didn't bother to text. I tried to process everything in mind, she would only stay at the place where we usually go before. I ran to the park as fast as I could, not caring about anything that I might bump into. It was so quiet and dark when I got there. I walked around and started looking around. I keep looking at her message as I start to worry. I don't know where she is, and I don't have any idea what happened. I couldn't stop worrying. I couldn't even calm down. I need to see her.

I turned to my right and I gasped for what I saw. She was lying on the ground, not moving. I sprinted to where she was and somehow, I got relieved.

"Kristen?" I uttered.

She slowly turned her head up to me and cracked a sad smile. I adjusted my vision to make everything clear. Her eyes looked tired; she had been crying. Without a doubt, I picked her up from the ground and let her sit, taking another chance to look at her. Her eyes are starting to turn small from crying too much. Her hands and knees are bleeding. I turned to look at the side where she was lying a moment ago, and saw her bag. She ran away, looks like it. I lowered myself down and faced her, our eyes met. My heart sank. She looked so hurt, and I couldn't stand seeing her in this kind of state. I have never seen her cried before. The strong Kristen I used to know had seem to fade away. The girl who had been holding her walls up and guarding herself had finally let someone see what she truly is; she's broken. I couldn't stand seeing her like this.

I didn't break our eye contact. I know I shouldn't be doing this, but I couldn't stop myself anymore. I slowly placed my right hand on her cheek and wiped the tear that was about to fall. I don't know how could I make it happen, but as much as possible, I don't ever want to see her like this anymore. I want to protect her, to be always be here for her. Sadness started building up inside me. I wish I could make everything about her life alright. I wish I know what's bothering her. I wish I could change everything. But would she let me? Her words came back inside my head again. I moved closer to her and tried to brush it all off away. She's right in front of me. I could change things if I wanted to.

I caressed her cheek as she close her eyes. Another tear fell, making it feel like I just got my heart out of my chest. I wish I could just make it stop, but she looked so hurt and I couldn't say anything. I tried to open my mouth, and without any warning, her small arms wrapped around my neck, making her small body crash into mine.

I rested my head on hers as I wrapped my arms around her. If this is what she needs, then I can give her a lot more than this. I stayed sitting on the ground as she cried on my chest. I started rubbing circles on her back as I hug her tight, not wanting to let go. I wish I had the power to make her tears stop falling. She kept sobbing, and my heart keeps on crashing. I tightened the hug as I took a deep breath. I can't bear this anymore.