And Then I Found You

'I love you'

"Can we talk about this?" He asked hesitantly.

It was late, very late now and the pair of them had had quite an evening of it all. The Paparazzi had obviously upset Helena and not only that but she seemed to be distancing herself from him and his question as she got changed into some new P.J's now they were back home. She was tried and confused about all the events of this night at the hospital, well outside the hospital. She just wanted to be able to sleep on it until she was ready to answer him and all the questions that were sure to follow. By that she mainly knew this was about their heated kiss one of which Helena was beginning to regret. She didn't know how she felt about all this yet, it was too soon to jump into anything. She missed him, missed him terribly, she loved him deep down yet there were problems between them still holding her back form ever telling him.

As she was now finally changed Helena pulled back the duvet of her bed before slowly getting in and under the warm covers. She felt bad that she still hadn't given him an answer yet she didn't really know what to say. This was all so awkward.

"Maybe tomorrow, but right now Johnny I'm tired and just want to rest" she finally said watching as the slight disappointment spread across his handsome face.

Nodding at this slowly Johnny simply cleared his throat before walking out of the room without a single word. He needed to know how she felt, it was clear how upset she was but he also needed to know if part of that sadness was because she regretted kissing him. He didn't know at all what was going on in that head of hers and for that reason alone it worried him.

Heading down the stairs of her home and into the back garden on this dark and chilly night, Johnny sat himself on the patio steps. Looking out to the green while placing a cigarette in between his lips as he search for his lighter in his coat pocket he felt like shit. Finding the lighter Johnny cupped the tip of the cigarette while he flashed the flame a couple of times to get it lit. He needed some sort of release from all the bad energy and considering her had given up alcohol, cigarettes were the closet thing he had to relieve himself.

Inhaling the smoke Johnny slowly let it spiral from his lips before taking another drag of the intoxicating killer between his fingers. His mind was to active with questions to sleep. He'd stay out here all night if he could, even if it was getting even colder the longer he was sat there.

"Should you really be smoking?" a small voice came from behind him making him jump slightly before turning to see Billy standing there in his P.J's with a thick coat zipped up around him to keep him warm. "Considering the circumstances" he added, meaning that his mum was in this state because of them.

Johnny knew he was probably here to make his life even more of a living hell and right now he was in no mood to be told what an arsehole he was. "Not now Billy, now is not the time" Johnny said calmly before turning his face away to look back at their garden as he continued to inhale more of the smoke. Billy edged forward standing just beside him, crossing his arms as the bitter chill made him shudder slightly.

"Listen if you're here to moan and tell me what a good for nothing piece of shit I am can we do that tomorrow? Right now I just want to be left" Johnny's tone was harsher this time but his anger wasn't aimed at Helena's son. No it was aimed more at this ugly situation he was in. He was on edge and even Billy could see he was upset over something probably to do with his mum as that was all Johnny seemed to be upset about recently. Sitting down beside him Johnny eyed the boy cautiously from the corner of his eye as he sat there so quietly.

"I wasn't going to do that....I....I wanted to thank you" Billy said almost in a timid whisper. Thank him? now Johnny was all ears "What for?" Moving the cigarette away from Billy Johnny was wary of the fact it was still lit and therefore he didn't want any smoke to blow in the kids direction.