Hospital Beds and Memories (All Time Low Fanfiction | Jack Barakat)

Batshit Crazy

"I've got an emergency," Jack whispered through the phone, "I'm locked in my bathroom and afraid to go out. The girl won't leave. Help me!"

I laughed, "Jack, you really have to be more careful. I'm not going to tell you to stop acting all jacky and shit, but I am going to tell you to chose your girls wisely."

"She's hot. And don't use my name as an adjective, asshole."

"Do you still want me to help, or not?"

"Yes, please, I'm sorry. Oh god, she's banging on the door, help!" Jack started panicking.

"Come on out Jack!" an 'innocent' female voice said, "We can go for another round."

"Have you tried doing something disgusting?" I suggested, trying to suppress the laughter inside of me.

"Yes, I even tried farting. It only made her want me more! What the fuck is wrong with her!" Jack rushed is a whisper-shouting manner.

"What about-"

"Yes! I've tried everything, please come here and save me!"

I chuckled, "Ok, fine. I'll be there in 15."

"Can you come faster?" Jack begged.

"No, it takes a while to get to your place. And stop complaining, you're only making me stay at home longer."

"Please leave now."

I hung up the phone and laughed to myself. This was exactly what I was thinking about last night at the club. He always went for the girls that were easy to sleep with, but that didn't mean they were easy to get rid of, quite the opposite actually. Some girls would leave before he even noticed, other would leave at a more reasonable time, and then there were girls that just wouldn't leave. That's what I was here for. I made a deal with Jack that I would come to his house and improvise a dramatic scene so the girl would have to leave. I was becoming an expert actor. There were many things I had pretended to be: I once acted like I was his sister who was distressed because their dad was in the hospital, sometimes I was the classic girlfriend catching him cheating, I had been the owner of the house, and other times I was just another girl he slept with. It was a real mix, there was nothing I couldn't do. This time I decided to step it up a notch, this girl really sounded like a barnacle, plus it was fun to see how far I could go. I quickly printed out a picture and got other stuff I might have needed to make it more believable.

When I got to Jack's house I got the key from it's secret hiding spot behind the wall lamp and open the door. I loudly closed it, to make my presence known. This better be good.

"Babe! I'm home!" I shouted through the house. I acted as if I waited for a reply when I hung my jacket up. When I didn't get any I called out again, "Babe? Are you home?"