I Need To Be Loved (Ricky Horror Fan Fic) [Book #1]

Just To Hold You

AN: This chapter is dedicated to Allisonlovesit for leaving such a nice comment on the last chapter!

The next day, Ricky came by our bus to pick me up so we could hang out before we played. I thought it was kind of sweet that he wanted to hang out. Jeremy gave us a suggestive look as we walked out of the bus together. As we walked out of the air-conditioned bus, I immediately felt sweat form on my skin from the Arizona heat. Ricky was walking really close to me, so close that our arms were almost touching. Even with the heat, it wasn’t like I minded. 

Ricky was about to say something when he was cut off. “Gabby!” an Australian accent yelled. I turned around even though I couldn’t imagine who would call me by my real name here. Only my mum and my Aunt Addy called me Gabby and obviously neither of them were here.

“Gabby!” the man yelled again as he ran up to us. Ricky gave me a questioning look as if to say ‘what the fuck?’ As the man neared us trying to catch his breath, I realized I vaguely remembered him. He looked to be in his late forties. He was in a white t-shirt and jeans. His brown hair was the same as my natural color and his blue eyes matched mine. It couldn’t be who I thought it was. There was no way. “I missed you so much, Gabby,” the man told me and I knew I was right. This man was my father.

I felt my eyes begin to water and my stomach churn. I wanted to throw up. How could he just come back here and tell me he ‘missed’ me? I think I deserved an explanation at least. Because of him, I can’t even think about being in a relationship because I don’t want to end up like my mum. Because of him, I had to move across the globe with an aunt I never met. He ruined so much for me. Before I could say anything, a women with long blonde hair and brown eyes came up behind him with a boy who looked about ten and was like a younger male version of the lady. This must be his ‘new’ family. As I looked up at him, stared into this eyes that matched mine, I felt fury boil up inside of me. I hated this man. I didn’t even know him and I hated his guts. I couldn’t believe he had the nerve to show up at Warped Tour with his new family and still tell me that he missed me. I pulled my fist back and before I knew what I was doing, my fist collided with his cheek. The lady and the kid gasped and Ricky’s eyes got wide.

I stood there watching him clutch his cheek in pain for a moment before all my emotions started to pour out of me. “How could you leave us? We needed you! You fucked up my whole life and now you come back and all you can say is that you missed! You don’t even know anything about, ‘Dad!’” I shouted using air quotes around the dad part. The tears spilled down my cheek and all I wanted to do was punch him again, but I found a way to control my actions this time.

“Gabby, I’m sorry,” he told me looking upset. He had no right to be upset. He hurt me. A quick punch didn’t even begin to compare to how much pain he had caused my mum and me.

“Sorry doesn’t fucking cut it!” I shouted angrily as I stormed away. If I stayed there, I would probably end up hitting him again and as much as I’d love to do that I knew I shouldn’t.

“Midnight!” I could hear Ricky yelling from behind me, but I didn’t turn around. I was so angry yet there were tears streaming down my cheeks. I knew if I talked to Ricky I might end up yelling at him or just full on breaking down in front of him.

“Are you ok?” he questioned putting a hand on my shoulder. As soon as he saw me crying he pulled me into a hug. As much as I hated crying in front of people, I couldn’t stop myself. I cried into his chest my body shaking violently. I had bottled up these tears up for years trying to be strong for my mum and then trying not to let my feelings show. I just needed to let them out. “It’s ok,” Ricky soothed rubbing my back, but it wasn’t ok. He wouldn’t understand. His dad hadn’t left him. He hadn’t been shipped off to a new country. I guess it was nice to have him care so much. For some reason I felt really safe in his arms.

“You know, you really don’t look like a Gabby,” he told me suddenly obviously trying to lighten the mood. I let out a laugh and looked up at him. Just standing there in his arms made me feel really safe and for some reason I really wanted to kiss him.

He used his thumb to wipe me tears and gave me a smile. He pushed some hair out of my face and before I knew what was happening, he was leaning down with his eyes closed. The next thing I felt was his lips softly pressing against mine. Surprisingly, I didn’t push him away like I thought I might. Even though I wanted to kiss him, I thought I might chicken out half way through and start thinking about the pain of relationships again, but I didn’t. I just let him kiss me. To be honest, I never wanted it to end. It was the best feeling I had ever experienced. Pure bliss. I wrapped my arms around his neck and began to kiss him back. My fingers tangled in his long hair and butterflied began to erupt in my stomach.

When he pulled away, he had a small smile on his face. It was a special kind of smile, though. Something was different about it. I liked knowing that I had caused this special smile.

For some reason, I thought I would be upset about this kiss. I thought that if someone had ever kissed me, I’d get scared and run. I usually got scared just at the thought of loving someone, yet here I was beaming after Ricky kissed me.

I could feel a blush forming on my face. I’m sure my face was as red as his. As I looked into his beautiful eyes, I couldn’t help but let some negative thoughts creep into my head. Was I really read for a real relationship? Was I really ready to take that leap and get over my fears? Then Jeremy’s voice creeped into my thoughts. ‘Live in the moment.’ I felt my smile widen. I think I might finally be read to live for now instead of worrying about the future. I think I might be able to stop pushing people away. I think I was ready to love.