Shut Up or I'll Kiss You

Kiss of Revenge Ch. 14.1

Kiss of Revenge Ch. 14.1: Kiss of Goodbye

Emma's POV:

I woke up. Everything hurts. The light's too blinding. My head aches. My body's in pain.

I closed my eyes in an attempt to shut everything out. The pain. The ... hurt.

Then I remember where I'm at and why I'm here.

"What we are for you is a burden. What we are is nothing but an obligation. And I'm tired Charles. I'm tired of waiting for you to turn your back on her and choose us – your family."

They looked at me. They just looked at me with all my pain. Charles is still holding RB's hand. He still won't let go.

I started walking away. My path blurred because of all the tears. Then after I'm out of their door, I got out of balance and slipped on their porch steps. It happened slowly... I see my world tilting. My body hitting the ground... and then the pain. That immense physical pain. I cried out. Everything hurts. Everywhere it hurts.

Then fear took over. My hand instinctively curled onto my belly.

Charly. Oh my god.

I feel myself bleeding. I reached out to my leg, and the blood in my hand intensified my fear.

No. My baby. Oh God, no. Not Charly.

I don't mind my pain anymore. My baby, she's hurting more than I am. What have I done?!

I felt hands all over me. Then that manic voice. And in the blur of the moment, I saw his face. Charles.

He's with me. He's with us.

His hands framed my face, wiping my tears away as they come. I cling to him. Crying.

"Charles. My baby. Oh God. Please. Save her. Charles. Save her." I pleaded as my tears flow. He holds me, whispering reassurance. "Don't let her die. Please Charles. Save her."

I don't know how long we've been there... with the pain... with the fear, when suddenly we heard the defeaning sound of the siren. I was hauled up and Charles never left my side. He holds my hand as they rush me through. His face is all I see. He's like a religion... a devotion, I cling to him for our lives. He's all that we've got.

I tried to hold on. To keep my hand on his. But pain took over. My belly hurts. Are you trying to get out little Charly? I asked her. Then another pain. Please, just hold on a little more baby. I felt pain again. I imagined Charly drowning with the blood that's inside me. Crawling desperately, wanting to be out the hell that is inside me.

Let her out. Let her breathe. Let her live.

"Just a few more moments Charly. Please... please live."

I felt Charles hands tighten around me. He touches my belly where our baby is. He whispered something and then another pain. I tried to look down, and I see his tears and his lips pressed to my tummy.

"No Charles. Save her. Let her live. Please."

I felt another excruciating pain. Then nothing.

I opened my eyes when I hear someone at the door. Instinctively my hands curled on my tummy. I can't feel her. I started to panic. I pleaded him to save her.

I looked down and I can see the end of my bed. No more bump in the way. No more Charly. I can't help the tears. A pain I didn't know I could feel spread thru me like a wildfire.

I looked up and saw Charles on my bedside, he's looking down at me. He took my hand to his and shook his head. And that confirms everything. My hand then moves over where my heart is. I felt Charles sit next to me. He kissed my forehead and enveloped me in an embrace. I cling to him. I felt his tears as it falls on my head. I felt his pain for our lost child. Charly.

For a long time, we stayed that way. We hugged and shared our pain for our unborn daughter. But when the tears dried, the nurses came and checked up on me. I remembered what I asked of him last.

He was now seating to the chair next to my bed. "I asked you... to save her. What happened?"

He didn't looked up at me. His head's down, his hand on his lap. "There's no choice Emma."

"Did you do this to make me suffer? Did you do this because you don't like me that much? Charly should've lived. You love Charly. She should be the one living, breathing, experiencing life. You have a choice Charles."

He looked at me and the pain I saw in him hurts me more. "I want her to live Emma. She's my daughter too. Do you think I just let her die?"

I tried to blink back the tears, but they won't stop. We lost Charly. I heard him sigh and I felt his head softly touch the hospital bed. I looked down and see him crying. I raised my hand and hesitated on touching him. Then I heard him whisper his apologies... for me.. for Charly and for what happened.

I did not touch him. I lost my daughter. He lost us. I cried on my own. He suffer alone. To say that he deserve this pain is selfish, I know. But... I have nothing... no one. He and RB, they should take the burden of my lost child with me.

"I want to be alone Charles." I said when my tears dried.

"Do you need anything?" he asked as he stands up.

"Bring back Charly." I replied and looked up at him. He had the decency to winced and looked away. "I..."

"You cannot?"

"Emma." He sounded almost pleading.

"Alone Charles. I want to be alone."

He did not say another word and just left.

I guess pain changes a person. I now remember everything in a different light.

When I knocked on to his door a few months back and saw him getting back with his ex. I remember the look in his eyes when he thought that he's the father of my child. He's scared. He's unprepared. He's not happy. I remember the relief that floods his face when I lied and told him that he's no the father.

I remember that night when I admitted that I lied for him and RB. That he's really the father of my daughter. That he'll be a father. He's torn. He immediately say that he'll took responsibility of my child but not my heart. Little did he know that both were fragile.

I remember when I exclaimed that I first felt my baby moved inside me. He rushed towards me and touched my bump. He felt it too. He looked at me that time with a smile of a father. He was greatful to me... as if I'm just delivering a good service of carrying my child inside me.

I remember when we first saw her on that little monitor. I looked at him his focus is at the monitor. I loved him so much then, he loved Charly but not the vessel that carries her.

All those months I'm carrying Charly I felt like I'm nothing but a vessel of an unborn child. I felt used. I am embarassed. I am hurt. And a mother's not supposed to feel all those things. A mother should be nurtured, cared for and loved. I don't.

But I moved forward knowing that at the end of this dark tunnel of pregnancy, I'll have my daughter as my light. I'll carry her after long hours of labor. Both of us feeling like we've just won our battle of survival. We'll both share that victory of just living.

I guess pain changes a person.

I no longer have Charly. I no longer am the same person. Pain already changed me.

ooOooOooOoo

O.N: I'm deeply sorry for updating just now. But I hope you enjoyed this short POV of Emma. I think she deserves to be heard.