Your soldier (Itzy Yeji X Male Reader)

Chapter 21

Location: The psychiatrist's office, Icheon, Gyeonggi province, Special forces HQ
Perspective: (y/n)

It is surprisingly hard for me to tell her what happened. There are things we did, that normal people wouldn't understand. And there are things we went through, that no one could empathize with.
"And what happened then?"
I shift around on the couch uncomfortably.
"What do you think? It was cold. We were all freezing, while lying in the snow. And we didn't know if we would survive that day."
I feel like I have to relieve all these memories, whenever I talk about them. It's like a nightmare. But worse. I know it's real, because it happened.

After successfully defending one of the Ukrainian cities from the Russian soldiers, we started to push them back. The Ukrainian defenses did their best as well. We reclaimed quite a lot of ground from the Russians. But as we got closer and closer towards their territories, we started to become overwhelmed by their numbers.
The five of us managed to get behind enemy lines, as they reformed themselves, to stop the Ukrainian advances. But after a couple of days of constant fighting, without food and ammunition, we were in a bad place. While hiding inside a snowy forest, we tried to get out of the situation alive, in which we got ourselves into.

"I got no ammo left, either."
I sighed as I checked my remaining bullets.
"We had a good run you guys."
Tiger nudged Seahawk with his elbow.
"Don't say something like that."
Hearing hasty footsteps, I turned around. Panther dropped into the snow next to me.
"Alright, boys. It's official now. We are screwed."
I heard whimpering sounds to my left.
"Get yourself together, Mad Dog."
The new guy looked up at me. His eyes were watery. I wished Wolf was here with us. A week ago he had gotten shot twice in the shoulder. The medics said he was gonna make it, but I missed him. Although he was new too, he was at least brave.
"On a scale from one to ten. How screwed are we?"
Seahawk looked to his left at Panther.
"Nine."
I scoffed.
"We will be fine."
"Well..."
I froze as I heard the sound Panther was worrying about.
"The enemy got some big company."
"Bloody tank!"
The whimpering to my left began once more.
"We are out of ammo. What do you expect us to do?"
Three Russian soldiers came into sight. They walked slowly. Their rifles ready to kill anything that moves. The deep snow made them struggle, but it didn't stop them from coming closer and closer.
Looking at Panther, I knew we were thinking the same thing.
"We have plenty of ammunition coming our way. "

As the soldiers were slowly getting closer, we were able to see their faces under their helmets. The three of them looked very young. Not much older than 19 or 20. They were probably forced to fight in this war. I didn't think they would have chosen this on their own accord.
"They are just boys."
Panther's voice stayed cold at Tiger's comment.
"Doesn't change the fact that they are gonna shoot us."
"If they are really forced to fight, maybe we can convince them to surrender."
I shook my head.
"There must be senior soldiers in the tank."
We all heard the engine coming closer.
"The boys will be too scared of them to give up."
Panther took a deep breath.
"It doesn't matter how old they are."

"And what did you feel in that moment?"
I furrow my eyebrows as Ms. Lee throws me out of my trance like state of mind. It takes me a second to remember where I am. I fake a cough, before answering.
"I felt bad. Obviously. They were young. They maybe have had girlfriends at home. And mothers."
I bite my lip. I don't want to talk about this.
"Did you agree with that man? That it didn't matter how old they were?"
I don't know if she knows Panther's name or not. "This man" Sounds somewhat distant.
I think for a while, before I answer.
"I definitely did not like it. But he had a point. It was either them, or us. And they were the ones, who invaded the Ukraine."
Ms. Lee starts to write something on her notepad. I hate it when she does that.

Location: Itzy's dorm
Perspective: Yeji

"Hi, Yeji."
"Hello, Tiger."
I smile at him as I open the door.
"Come in. Chaeryoung is just getting ready."
I catch myself looking behind him, hoping for (y/n) as well.
"Thank you."
Disappointed, that he isn't there, I shut the door, following Tiger into the living room.
"Something to drink?"
It's still a little awkward, since we haven't seen each other in a long time.
"No thank you."
"Are you sure? Chaeryoung has been in the bathroom for hours already. It's gonna take a while, until she is done."
"Yah!"
I hear the girl's voice from inside the bathroom.
"Do you think we will be able to leave by tonight?"
Tiger chuckles as I shake my head.
"Water please."
While I get some for him, I'm still disappointed, that (y/n) isn't here. The last weeks have been boring. Although we text sometimes, I can feel that he is holding back. I wish I knew what's bothering him.
"Here you go."
Tiger takes the glass out of my hand. I realize, that he must know more. Maybe he can tell me what's going on.
"How-How is (y/n) doing?"
I try to let my voice sound as nonchalant as possible, but his smile tells me, that he knows how badly I want hear the answer.
"He is doing well."
Tiger doesn't seem like he wants to add anything to that statement as he drinks some of the water.
"Did he say something about me?"
I look away, fidgeting with my hands in my lap.
"He didn't. But I think you know how much you mean to him, without (y/n) having to say something."
Slightly nodding, I realize, that that's true. I was insanely worried, when he told me, that we can't be together. For a moment, I thought, he didn't love me anymore. But that was foolish. I know that he loves me. Just as much as I love him. The fact that he kept that picture of me, even after we broke up, is proof enough.
"Trust me, he will come back, once he is ready."
"Do you know, what is going on exactly?"
I see Tiger shifting around uncomfortably, before drinking more water.
"I do. I think. I'm not sure, how bad it is. But since I know him very well, I know that he will overcome this."
Instead of giving me a better answer, Tiger just confused me even more.
"What does he need to overcome?"
"Yeji,"
Tiger sighs and I feel bad for pressuring him.
"This is very personal. And I understand, that you want to know what's happening. But I also understand, why (y/n) doesn't tell you his issues. And since it's very private, it's not my place to tell you."
I lean back against the cushions.
"Would you tell Chaeryoung, if you had the same problem?"
In that moment, she comes out of the bathroom. I see Tiger smile at her, before turning back to me. He slowly shakes his head.
"I wouldn't."
"What are you not gonna tell me?"
Chaeryoung walks over to us.
"Nothing, sweetie."
"Tell me. Come on."
Chaeryoung pouts and I see Tiger struggling.
In that moment, his phone saves him from spilling the beans.
"Gotta take this."

Location: Icheon, Gyeonggi province, Special forces HQ

Third person

After knocking, Tiger hears a voice behind the wooden door.
"Come in."
Once he enters the room, he salutes the man, who is sitting behind the desk.
"Dan-gyeol!"
"Please sit down."
"Yes, sir."
Once Tiger occupies one of the leather chairs, the general starts to talk.
"We just received a message from your team. As you know, we lost contact with them, after Bakhmut got attacked."
"I'm aware, sir."
The general takes a deep breath, trying to hide his own grief.
"I'm sorry to inform you, that one of your   men has lost his life."