Your soldier (Itzy Yeji X Male Reader)

Chapter 20

Location: The psychiatrist's office, Icheon, Gyeonggi province, Special forces HQ

Perspective: (y/n)

"Thank you for today."
She smiles at me as I walk out.
I hate it, but I know I have to do it. It has been two weeks now. Two weeks since I last saw Yeji. Although she does text me once in a while, we don't communicate often. I really hope I haven't hurt her or something, when I explained to her, why I can't be with her. We didn't talk about it, since we both got back to the restaurant. I wish I could have explained it better to Yeji. To make it easier for her to understand. But the truth is, I don't understand it completely either. I knew the risk of having PTSD was gonna be high. Especially as a special force soldier. But I thought, probably like everyone else, that I won't get it. The worst? I don't have anyone to talk to.
Although Yeji would try her best of course, she won't be able to get what I went through. Why this happened to me. And I honestly don't need much emotional support. I just have to get out of this.
The guys can't help me much either. We do share similar or even the same experiences, but everyone is different. And we never talked about it once. I don't know if one of them as a serious issue as well. Maybe Panther? He is the oldest and has done the job the longest. But he is always calm and knows what to do. I rarely see him making a mistake.
I don't even know if the psychiatrist is helping. She might be. But I haven't felt a chance yet. The only thing I talk about, is what happened during all of these operations. She actually doesn't talk much.

Stepping out of the building, I look at the restaurant across the street. A big smile appears on my face as I start walking. It has been a while, since I have been at Ye-Jun's.
Entering the restaurant I see the owner standing behind the counter, talking to a man in uniform. It's already starting to get dark outside and Ye-Jun hasn't turned on the lights yet, so I can't see the man's rank on his shoulders. I almost react too slow as he turns around, after hearing me come in.
"Dan-gyeol!"
I salute the officer in front of me. He outranks me quite a bit.
"Dan-gyeol."
He greets me back, seemingly calm. It matches his age, he looks like he is almost fifty.
"That's the lazy dumbass I told you about."
My eyes grow wide at Ye-Jun's words.
"Fire him or something."
She can't hide her amusement as she sees my shocked expression. It takes me a moment to realize, that the man must be her father.
"Don't mind my daughter. She is so rude, cause she hangs out with so many soldiers."
He gives her a scolding look and Ye-Jun disappears into the kitchen without another word.
"That's no problem, sir. I have known her for a while now."
"Really? I don't think I have seen you before."
I extend my hand in greeting.
"Lieutenant (y/n) (l/n). Deputy leader of the 'Eagle squad'."
I want to take this opportunity to get onto his good side. He is high ranking, maybe I get lucky in the future.
"Ah. I think I heard a thing or two about your squad."
"I hope only good ones."
I smile at him, while hearing Ye-Jun rummaging around in the back.
"Hope you don't mind me asking. But you aren't Korean, are you?"
You shake your head.
"I'm from (y/k)."
"I see. I heard it's nice there."
"You should visit some day."
"I might. Once I retire."
He pats me on the shoulder, before checking his watch.
"I have an important meeting coming up. I will see you soon."
He winks at me before turning towards the kitchen.
"Goodbye, sweetie!"
"Get lost already!"
The two of us chuckle at his daughter's rudeness, before he walks past me and opens the door.
"Goodbye. Shadow."
He leaves me stunned as he walks out. I didn't expect him to know my code name. There aren't a lot of people who know both of my names. Not even at the HQ. It means he must know me, or the team pretty well. Maybe he just didn't know my face.

"Would you like to talk about something different today?"
I look at Ms. Lee. The cliche of lying on the sofa during a session was always weird to me, so I'm just sitting. Is she thinking I'm not comfortable?
"Why not?"
I lean back, expecting her to come up with something.
"It says here, you heave been on quite a number of missions. Is that correct?"
It somewhat bothers me, that she has almost 100% of my whole file. It feels weird. As if she knows everything about me. Except for me, maybe only ten other people know it. The rest of the military only knows what they need to know. And unfortunately, it seems like Ms. Lee needs to know a lot.
"There isn't much information about your time in the Ukraine conflict. Can you tell me about it a little more?"
I sigh, thinking about what to say. It sounds like she wants to hear something, that she doesn't already know.
"Anything specific?"
"How about the time you spent in Russian territory?"
I hoped she wouldn't bring that up. But I know, I can't avoid her questions. It's the only way to get better. I hope.

Location: somewhere in the Ukraine
Third person
At the same time

"Why don't we take this route?"
Panther points at the map, which they unfolded on the ground. The four soldiers are lying underneath a tree, behind a couple of bushes.
"The Ukrainians have reported Russian movement here."
Seahawk points at a small ridge, along Panther's route.
"We might get shot before we know what hit us."
"All the other roads or ways are either blocked as well, or take too long."
Seahawk gestures towards the North of the map.
"I think this is the right one."
The four of them don't even react as a loud explosion echoes through the air. Over the past weeks, their minds got used to the environment of war as much as possible. They could now fall asleep, even if they hear gunfire only a couple of streets away.
The shot of a tank and an explosion is nothing to them anymore.
"What about this one?"
Mad Dog points at a river.
"We could swim through it. The weather is getting warmer. And there are trees, so we have cover."
Wolf shakes his head.
"Russians."
A simple word. A simple words, which makes them all groan.
"How are we going to get out of this?"
Seahawk sighs.
Another explosion reaches their eardrums.
Looking towards the city on their left, Seahawks eyes grow wide.
"Where is the hospital?"
Panther's head shoots up.
"It's supposed to be next to that large building over there."
Wolf points at a big apartment building. But there isn't a building next to it.
"They bombed it."
Panther whispers in disbelief.
"They bombed the hospital."
Not a word needs to be spoken. They all know what is going on. Jumping to their feet, they make sure they are clear, while Panther puts the map in his pocket. The four of them start to run  down the hill. Hoping to find survivors.