Your Addiction, Simon Ghost Riley x Reader

Forever gone

"Sebastian..?" I slowly took off my mask.

My whole body was freezing and shivering. I almost thought my heart would stop. The brother, who I had not seen for years, was now standing right in front of me. The person who ruined my childhood was here to destroy the rest of my life.

'Look at you, my sister is finally a grown-up woman' he said, then gave me an insidious smile.

"Don't call me your sister" I felt disgusted hearing his words.

"Acting just like our father" He continued playing with my feelings.

"Did you bring me here just to tell me this shit?" I could feel his venemous words coursing through my body.

"You can't admit the truth, can you?"

I tried to stop my tears from forming. I knew what he said was only meant to insult me. But what if it was just the reality I avoided living in? I was actually the main reason this family broke into a million pieces. And even though I felt my mind being poisoned, I still didn't want him to see my weakness, to have all the power.

"Do you still remember that night, Y/N?" He started walking around me, like a predator ready to hunt.

I knew exactly which night he was referring to. The night I slit my father's throat. The moment I will remember until the day I die.

"It was not my fault and you know that" My blood was boiling, my intentions to kill him grew stronger.

"Of course, continue living in your own fantasy world, Y/N" a muscle in his jaw twitched "First you took away my mother and then my father. You made sure I would end up living a miserable life, didn't you?"

Frustration shimmered in my eyes as I said "Don't play the victim here, Sebastian"

I still couldn't understand how he ended up being my team's enemy. Nevertheless, I knew he wanted to avenge me for what I did to my parents.

And without a second thought I quickly grabbed my pistol hidden under my dress. I turned around to face him only to find him already pointing his gun at me.

"It is such a shame that only one of us will continue living" I spoke through my teeth. I could feel tightness in my chest, my breathing getting deeper.

"You are right, Y/N. If you disappeared permanently, the world wouldn't lose anything significant" His mouth curved into a smile.

I was so ready to shoot him, but something inside of me was stopping me from doing it. Maybe the fact that he was the only family I had. The feeling that killing him would mean erasing the last vestiges of my childhood. He was still my brother. Without him I would be just a lost soul in this dangerous world. The last piece of that cursed puzzle. If I lost my identity, I would lose my last hope to fix myself.

I could feel the color drain out of my face as we continued staring at each other, remembering the times we shared together. Falling snow around us, the terror that overtook us - I couldn't accept the fact that this family curse would be broken this way. It was either him or me. The curser or the cursed.

"Could you at least tell me why?" My lower lip quivered. I wanted to finally find the answer I had been looking for all this time. Even if he had killed me, I would have spend my last moments in peace, knowing the truth.

"Why was I so hated?" I asked as tears streamed from my eyes.

But the expression on his face had changed. Was it regret? Was it his realization? Sebastian glanced up at the sky, welcoming the snowflakes that fell on his face. As if he was appreciating the beauty of nature, feeling everything at the same time.

"Sebastian?" He shut his eyes as I asked.

Now both of us had our guns lowered. I was hopeful we could part ways without hurting each other. Exactly then I realised I wouldn't be able to kill him, to complete my mission. I didn't want to be followed by his shadows for the rest of my life.

Just like that we spent a few minutes in complete silence. All I could hear were the distant shouts of people and the sounds of the city. The winter wind ached my fingers as I clenched and unclenched them, my body shivering even more.

But things eventually have to come to an end. 

He once again looked deep into my eyes, rage still pulsed through his veins.

"There is so much you don't know, Y/N" Was it the hurt I sensed in his words?

"So tell me, let me be finally free" I knew I would have gotten down on my knees and begged him if I needed to.

"You ruined our family" I felt pain in my heart. I broke eye contact with him as I squeezed my eyes shut.

"At least this was what our father kept telling me since the day you came into our life"

I slowly opened my eyes, not understanding a single word he was saying. I was confused like never before.

"He told me the reason why he did what he did" A few seconds of silence interrupted him but then he continued with his shaking voice "The truth is, it was..."

And then suddenly a loud sound of a gunshot filled the air. I froze as his blood spattered my face, my whole dress. A red spot started growing under his white shirt. Just where his heart was pounding a few seconds before.

Immediately. Sebastian fell to the ground, and I saw the guy who stole my brother. Simon was the one who finished the mission.

"Y/N, are you okay?" He ran towards me and started caressing my cheeks, as if he was afraid I was hurt.

Simon was the man who shattered my heart.

Suddenly, I took his hands away from me, not having the strength to look him in the eyes. I couldn't stand the feeling of him touching me, I felt my vision become blurry. But I managed to find the courage to get down to my brother who was still somehow alive. Darkness was surrounding him.

"Sebastian.." I felt his cold cheeks, noticed blood coming out of his mouth.

"You deserved so much more than this, Y/N. I am so sorry I realized my mistakes so late" The pale colour on his face spread as sweat dripped from his forehead.

Taking a deep breath, he relaxed his back and rested his eyes on the dark night sky. A smile spread across his face as he closed his eyes for the last time.

In no time, he sank into an endless sleep, surrounded by his greatest enemy, me. As his body lay stiff in front of me, his soul just slipped through my fingers. The idea of me being alone in this world for the rest of my life scared me. I repeated his name, each time with more hurt in my voice.

Simon was standing just a few steps away from me, not understanding what was going on. I knew it wasn't his fault, I was certain Simon would never intend to hurt me. But knowing the man who loved me took away the last drop of my sanity drove me crazy.

"Did you know him?" His hand rested on my shoulder as I held onto my dead brother's body.

I realized the secret of my past had been taken away from me just like Sebastian's life. Like him, it was lost.

Forever gone. 

I would never again get a chance to know what happened between me and my parents. What was the reason I was never needed. Never loved.

I was the last one standing in my family. The last one to be alive. The one who would have to suffer for years and years.

From that moment, I felt my world fall apart. I knew this would be the beginning of my end.