From The Start

40

Candice

All the worries that I had were drifting off into a distant memory. I felt I wasn't going to let this Tristan thing get to me.

I wasn't going to let him ruin my life, again! I thought I was shutting out Nathan out of defense, but now I realized it was more of insecurity; these barriers that I've always built for myself.

I decided I would give him a chance. I would let him in my world.
I said it countless of times to myself. I wanted Nathan James apart of my life.

After a while of contemplating this, I decided to text Nathan my decision, unsure of whether he would reciprocate. I began to pace the floor of my room, acknowledging that this was a big step.

I stopped and took a deep breath.

Nathan hadn't text me in about almost a week. I wasn't sure if it was because he got tired of my bi polar state...

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"Candy baby, I heard this party would be epic, wouldn't want to miss it." Tristan spoke over a booming rap song that I hated. I just nodded in agreement to his comment.

After several minutes of driving through the woods in darkness, we pulled up to a road near several other cars were parked, by a large wooden cottage looking house. The car came to a stop and everything turned off, even the music. Tristan sat there in absolute silence while I waited.

"OK this is going to be fun, so please don't ruin it with your mood killer bullshit, OK?" Tristan add, squinting through the windshield. I was appalled  by his words... Moment killer bullshit?

"What's that suppose to mean?" I spoke up seriously.

"Don't worry about what it means just don't do it." He added his head positioned straight ahead.

"No, I am going to worry because your calling me out, so say what you mean." I almost yell, erect in my seat. I felt the urge to slap him, so I popped off my seat belt while he sat motionless for a second and then turned to look at me with death and darkness, snuffing out the in his lightness in his eyes.

"Are you my fucking superior, why do I have to answer to you? I plainly said what I had to say, now leave it the fuck alone." He snapped. His hands went up mid air and his light skin turned red.

"Whatever Tristan. Now, you just killed the freaking mood... I want to go home, so please open the car door." I spoke as my voice dropped. I really needed to get out.

"No! I'm not opening shit. You agreed to come with me to this party and thats final..." He yelled and grabbing me aggressively. "I don't appreciate you disrepsecting me and making me look like a little bitch all the time, especially infront of your girls. I give you everything and you just fucking dog me." He held on too tight to my sweater his voice filled with venom.

"Tristan let go. You're hurting me." I cried, the sweater tight around my neck, almost cutting my air supply. He ignores my plea and contiues to yell closer in my face.

"Candy. I don't fucking care. You're going to listen and listen well... Stop disrespecting me, stop making me look like a fucking dumbass and when I ask you to do something... you damn sure get to it quick." I felt fear in my body with his words. He looked me dead in my eyes and I couldn't look away. I felt cool tears run down my cheek, trickling to my neck. I've never felt so scared by Tristan in all our two years of being together. Once he saw my tear filled eyes, he began to release his grip on me and his expression softened. He moves back to his side of the car and looks out the window not saying a word, meawhile, I cried my eyes out...