Where You Belong :: junhao

WYB :: epilogue

*junhui*

"my junhui, are you awake now? can you here me?"

the sound of very familiar voice of a girl had me woken up and forced myself to open my eyes and also because i could feel how heavy my head was. i slowly opened my eyes but i had to shut it again after being greeted by the strong sunlight coming from the window and i could feel like this was the first time i had opened my eyes after a long time. it took me more than just a minute after i tried to open my eyes again, wishing that it could adjust to the lights coming from the surroundings.

and once i had opened my eyes fully, my vision may be blurred but i saw how this woman sitting beside me covered her mouth using her both hands as ive heard how he burst into tears as she keep calling my name even though she was cracking. i tried lifting my right hand but i couldn't feel anything so i just stared at her, watching her cry while calling my name but she got halted and she jerked her head from her back after hearing the door was creaking, prolly someone entered the room.

my mom stood up to give way to the doctors who're wearing blue uniform and nurses who're wearing white. they sat on the space on my bed beside me then they asked me some questions that i badly wanted to answer, but i couldnt feel anything at all. i couldnt feel my body except for my head that was being heavy like as if there was something on my head. the doctors had advice me not to force myself to move or do other things, they had also asked me if i remember anything.

so i answered them that i did. . i did remember anything, everything had happened even before and the reasons why i was here. i know i just had my heart transplant. . i remember how my mom cried so hard and keep telling me to breathe, fight and hold into my life. i saw how dad tried to encourage me that everything will be alright. and the same doctor in front of me had told me that they will do everything to have a successful operation. . and i bet they did.

oh well, i wouldnt be waking up right now if they didnt.

"always remember, dont move too much. avoid eating anything that wasnt on the list, avoid feeling too happy, sad, and surprise. just do everything this regimen had told you to do, we'll promise you would get recovered."

they had also congratulated me for being a survivor of my own battle and my parents couldn't thank me enough for choosing life when all i had to do was to choose to be dead. and as long as i want to feel something now that my mom was crying again, but i couldnt. my chest couldn't shrink the way that it did before when i know it should've so i just watched her there crying while telling her to stop. i couldnt even wipe her tears because my body felt so much novocaine.

that night, i stayed on the bed doing nothing but to try to move my hands along with my legs because i couldnt really feel it. i had also tried to widened my eyes since i felt like i had been sleeping for such a long time even my mouth which i felt like it had been locked. teka nga, why does i felt like i had been in some sort of coma when all i know was they only had me surgery? yun lang yun pero grabe bakit ganito yung epekto? it seemed like i was sleeping for more than a year. geez.

since that day, parents was really too focus on me that they did nothing but to monitor me, asked me what i was feeling, kung masakit daw na dibdib ko, or if i was having a hard time to breathe, everything that they could ask. pero yung tanging sinabi ko lang, my chest was pumping so bad. . yung dibdib talaga, hindi yung puso. and thats when i realized na may tahi nga pala yung dibdib ko and it wasnt that okay yet. some of the corner was still fresh and you could still see the thread they used.