With You (Namjoon ff)

Chapter 60

You started smiling more these days. It finally felt as if you were healing from all the fears and trauma you had carried with you ever since you were a teen. The world looked like a better place to live. The days seemed brighter and you were more active. You learned new recipes for yourself. You started reading books again and even though he wouldn't understand anything Yuto would still accompany you every time you would spend time reading books. You would turn the volume of the speakers and dance as if no one was watching because no one was actually watching. Yuto would also get excited and join you dancing.

Sometimes you would think about Jiho, and though you didn't know how he must be doing, you just prayed that he would be alright. About Namjoon, you had forgiven him. You understood how much his guilt must be eating him up and he did take care of you even though he would've done it because Jiho told him to. And about misunderstanding your love for him, you wanted to prove him wrong. But you didn't want to bother him if he didn't want to give you a chance. You still loved him as much as you did on the day you confessed to him. But maybe some people were not meant to be, and if you were meant to be you would eventually find your way to each other. You were at peace and happy.

You were walking home as you didn't bring your car to work since your office was close to your house. You finished early today so you were skipping steps as you were in a good mood. You were humming a song as you walked home.

Y/N: daechwita daechwita ja ullyeola daechwita...

You also bought some popsicles for Yuto because he loved them. You reached your apartment and excitedly entered in hoping to be greeted by Yuto as usual. But you froze at your place as you dropped everything in your hands.

There in front of you was Yuto lying lifeless in a pool of blood. You rushed to him and checked his pulse, none. You panicked as you took him in your arms trying desperately trying to wake him up. You carried him immediately and got a cab to the hospital. You held him closely, trying to brush off any negative thought.

Y/N: He'll be fine, he's gonna be fine. It's going to be fine, he's going to be okay. Please hold on Yuto, please don't give up on me.

You kept reassuring yourself because you were not going to let life take another dear one from you, not this time. You rushed into the Hospital as you reported to the desk and they took him in immediately. You were standing there outside the ER as you body was shaking in fear. You can't lose Yuto. He was your happiness and he made you want to live a proper life. If he was going to be taken away you didn't know what you would do. "Everyone has a purpose in their life which they are meant to fulfill due to which they are still alive." That's what you always heard but it felt as if your life's purpose was to always be in pain.

The doctor came out.

Vet: He had no pulse. He was dead before you brought him here. I'm sorry we couldn't do much.

(A/N: I'M SORRY DON'T HATE ME I LOVED YUTO)

Y/N: Why did he suddenly-

Vet: He had a stroke. The stroke caused the blood to enter in the lungs and he must've coughed up blood. And do not blame yourself, there wasn't anything you could've done to save him.

Y/N: If I had come earlier-

Vet: The stroke was pretty bad, it must've taken his life at the spot. I'm sorry for your loss. He'll be moved to the morgue you can see him there.

You nodded weakly. You went towards the morgue where he was kept. You walked closer to him and hugged him. Though it's not advisable to hug dead bodies you didn't care. All the tears and pain came spilling out of you. You cried your heart out wanting him to come back.

This felt as if your nightmare came true but instead of Jiho, Yuto was taken away from you. It felt as if Yuto was the angel who gave his life for Jiho to be safe. Life always asked a price from you and this time it was Yuto. They eventually told you to leave the morgue. You left the room but stayed outside as if hoping Yuto to come out happily towards you as if this was some sort of prank.

You just wanted to disappear into the air. You just sat there as the pain seeped through your heart again and again. You felt tired now. You felt tired of losing your dear ones, tired of people leaving your life as if they were never there and tired of hoping for things to be okay when they are just about to go down.

Y/N: Why him? Why Yuto? He did nothing. Yuto...

You whispered to yourself as you were crying while your head was buried in your knees. You sat there for hours without moving, just questioning why you were still alive when the ones who helped you live were not with you anymore.

Your phone started ringing and you just ignored it. It rang again and you put it on silent without looking at the caller ID. You closed your eyes from the tiredness but your phone kept vibrating. You decided to see who it was because they wouldn't have called you these many times if it wasn't important. You were surprised but not fazed. There were 6 missed calls from...