Spencer went out into the rose garden with her journal in hand. She took out her pen and began to write.
Dear Andy,
It's been a year since you've gone to see the man upstairs. I miss you everyday...it's like a fresh wound every time I open my eyes from a dreamless sleep. Sometimes I don't sleep at all, I miss your presence. On darkest days I just want to see your face to turn my day around. I keep a picture on my nightstand, it's the one of us that we took at that old ice cream shop the very last day it was open. I miss and love you Andy, tell the man upstairs to save me a seat for when I arrive.
- love Spencer
——
Spencer closed her journal to her right sat Evie. Evie looked at her peacefully as let Spencer pet her. Evie was enjoying the company out in the garden. She sensed the sadness in Spencer. While she was petting Evie, Harry sat next to them. Spencer looked over at her therapist who had a sympathetic smile on his face. She tried hard not to cry but she couldn't hold back. Harry knew the history with Spencer and Andy. Harry held Spencer close to him. "I wish he was here" Spencer said. "You loved him" Harry asked. "He understood me and I understood him...we both had fucked up families...his dad abused him all his life, his mom wasn't in the picture" Spencer said. She grew silent, she didn't want to talk about the day he was taken from her. "To this day I blame myself for what happened to him, all his life he was unloved by everyone in his family, I made him feel loved...his smile was so precious" Spencer said. "How many people did Ben kidnap" Harry asked. "Maybe a thousand...he made them believe that they were useless to society and unloved" Spencer said. "How do you know all of that" Harry asked. "When Ben first started dating my mom he said he was a doctor trying to cure a deadly disease...we both believed him" Spencer said. "What's going on in this world is not your fault, all of this is Bens he did this not you" Harry said. Spencer's head was filled with so much confusion. One part didn't know what to believe, the other part knew who to believe.
That afternoon Harry gathered Louis, Jupiter, Cierra and Spencer for a afternoon out. "Where are you taking us" Louis asked. Taking his hand into his kissing the top of it. "Somewhere I took you when you were lost" Harry said. Winking at his husband, Louis knew exactly where they were headed. "Lead the way" Louis said. After a few minutes of walking they arrived in front of a familiar building. "A bakery" Spencer said. "Not just any bakery, the best bakery in Holmes Chapel of course" Harry said. "Yay daddy" Jupiter said. "That's the spirit angel" Harry said. Holding his daughter as she clapped her two year old hands. Entering the bakery a familiar face came out behind the counter. "Harry, my word your family has grown some hasn't it" Barbra said. Harry smiled at what she said. "You remember Jupiter" Harry said. "She's gotten so big" Barbra said. She smiled at the little girl, Jupiter smiled back at her. Hiding her face in Harry's neck as the shyness took over. "What can I get all of you" Barbra said.
After they ordered they waited for their delicious baked goods. Spencer wished she was baked right now. But she didn't tell anyone. "Dada is that you" Jupiter asked. A picture of sixteen year old Harry was on the wall. "Yes it is darling, isn't he cute" Louis said. Making Harry blush, even though he never blushed. "Look at that, is that a blush I see" Spencer teased. "Calm down now, it's a blush so what" Harry said. Louis took his hand looking at his husband happily.