By 4am I knew everything there was to know about Sam. The girl that caused so much pain and darkness in their lifes. I had read all the articles about her death and read all about the lawsuit they had won.
She died because a doctor made a mistake. He lost his wife and she lost her sister because a doctor messed up when she gave birth. Everything started to make sense now. Why his pain and sadness was always accompanied by regret and anger. He blames himself for losing her and in the back of her head, Jackie blames Ashton for it too.
Except for one post, there wasn't much I could find about the daughter she left behind but I could understand that he wanted to keep her away from the media.
I wanted to look up everything about them too. I wanted to know what he was like before her but I decided against that. I had already looked up so much about Jackie and Sam and their family that I felt guilty.
I felt like I was doing a background check on my friend and that felt wrong. Yet it seemed necessary to find out how many other things she lied about to hide all of this. I wanted to figure out why telling me was harder than making up stories. I couldn't care less that they were famous but I can't handle another liar in my life.
Especially after what Thomas did to me, how he lied to me for 6 months while cheating on me. And now I just found out even my new friends weren't exactly being honest with me.
That's the last thing I needed right now.
How can I trust someone new now when all everyone has been doing to me was lying?
I got up from the couch and closed my laptop when there was a knock at my door, at 4:27am. I looked through the hole first before opening the door to see the one out of three people that I did not want to see tonight. I contemplated just keeping it closed, pretending I was asleep but the light was on and there was music playing softly, I knew he would have heard that.
"I know you're standing infront of the door I can see the shadow, just let me in please." He pleaded and I waited another minute, really thinking about just walking away.
"I'm not really up for this crap right now." I said while my back rested against the door.
"Babe, just let me in." He said and when I heard the nickname he has been calling me for 7 years, I wanted to break down. I wanted to yell at him but I had no energy left to do so. "I told her about us. After she talked with Amber, she figured it out. She left me Elle."
"Are you trying to make me feel sorry for you?" I asked and I could feel the door move slightly, he was leaning against it on the other side.
"Elle I miss you." He said softly and a tear ran down my cheek as I listened to his words. "I regret what I did and I hope you can forgive me. I want you back."
"Thomas you ruined me." I said to him and I could hear him let out a sigh.
"But I miss you. I need my best friend back." He said and I looked down at my hands while he talked. "I want my girlfriend back and I want her to be my wife one day."
"What about your kid?" I asked him and he chuckled softly.
"She will never let me near our kid and I don't want a kid with her when I can have one with you."
"Go home Thomas, you should have thought about that 7 months ago or even a month ago when you decided to leave me. I was so inlove with you that I would have forgiven you back then. But now I had time to realise how much of an asshole you are." I said before walking away from the door. I turned off the music. "I'm going to bed, you should too." I turned off the light and I could hear him knocking on the door. I was still too awake, not ready to go to bed so I just sat on the couch in the dark while I listened to him begging for my forgiveness.
But after a while it got quiet and I fell asleep on my couch. Only to be woken up by my alarm not that much later. I had almost pulled an all nighter but there's no way I can skip work today.
And monday mornings were the worst of all.
I got up and took a quick shower before getting ready. But just when I sat down at the kitchen table with a bowl of cereal and my phone in my hand, the knocking on the door started again.
"For fucks sake Thomas, go away." I yelled at the door without moving even lightly.
"Not until you let me explain myself."
"Elle, I've been cheating on you for the past 6 months because I fell out of love with you. I have taken all my things to go live with my pregnant girlfriend who I do love. Take care, Thomas." I yelled at the door because I knew the note he left out of my head. I couldn't forget about it at all. It was a side of him I had never seen before after dating for 7 years and being friends for much longer.
"Just let me in please. This is still my place too." He tried but I was just getting pissed and no longer able to enjoy my breakfast.
"No it isn't, I paid for it, it's on my name and you have no right to be in here." I yelled at the door before texting Ashton to ask if he was at Jackie's. I needed someone and quickly.
elle: are you at jackie's?
redhead ashton: yeah, i was just picking up olivia
elle: any chance you could come to my place quickly and leave her with jackie just a little longer?
redhead ashton: why?
elle: I need some help with something
redhead ashton: alright, i'll be there in 2
"C'mon babe, I know you're still hung up on me. I know you still love me and that you want me back. Just let me inside and we can make up for the month we lost." He said but softer now, he was desperate and every time he opened his mouth, I realised how much time I wasted loving him. "Babe we can try again, we can make it work."
redhead ashton: is that thomas infront of your door?
"Who the hell are you?" I heard Thomas say and I got up from my seat and walked over to the door.
I tried to fight my brain that told me how bad of an idea this was before I opened the door and Thomas looked at me confused and desperate while I walked straight to Ashton. I put my hand on the back of his neck and connected my lips with his easily, the kiss was emotionless. Just two sets of lips touching eachother without any love or connection. He stood there frozen for a second before putting his muscled arms around my waist and kissing me back. "Goodmorning babe" I said to him with a smile when I pulled away before taking his hand and walking back to the door, "fuck off Thomas. I'm over you." I spit in his face and he looked so taken back, unable to say another word while I pulled Ashton in behind me and closed the door.
"You know what? I cheated on you all through our relationship. From the first month until the last. I just sticked with you for the sex and for my parents. You're not as special as you think Elle. Go rot in hell." He spit back through the closed door.
We stood there in absolute silence until I heard him walk down the stairs. "I'm so fucking sorry" I whispered to him, scared Thomas would still hear it.
"What was he doing here?"
"His girlfriend left him and he has been standing infront of my door since half past 4 trying to make me forgive him." I said and I tried so hard not to cry now. I've been holding on all night but he was gone now and he wouldn't return anymore now. His ego is too big to get rejected twice and he was sure I would jump right back into his arms.
"You were going to forgive him, weren't you?" Ashton asked softly and when I nodded, I couldn't hold back anymore tears. He took a step closer to me and wrapped his arms strongly around my body.
I wanted to get up and forgive him every second since he arrived here. I wanted to jump into his arms and hold him again.
Ever since it happened, I was hoping he would realise the mistake he made. I was hoping he would change his mind but he didn't. He just needed rebound sex before finding someone new.
"His girlfriend found out about me and told him he didn't want to be with a cheater. So he came back to me and started telling me how much he missed me and wanted me to forgive him. And I almost did every time I heard his voice. I needed to make sure he wouldn't come back to me because I would take him back so easily. So I'm fucking sorry for kissing you, it was all I could think of to make him stay away." I explained to him before I removed the tears from my face. He let go of me and I walked back to the kitchen to put my bowl of cereal in the sink and get lunch for today. "And then he admitted to being a much bigger cheater than I already knew."
"Elle, he is an absolute asshole. I know it's hard but you have to get him out of your mind."
"I have to go to work." I said to him and he let out a soft sigh but nodded. "And you have to get back to your daughter and your famous life." I said and he looked surprised at the words that left my mouth.
"You know?" He asked and I nodded while we walked down the stairs.
"My brothers found Jackie's post. They send it to me." I said with a sigh, "But I don't have the energy or time now to talk about how you and Jackie lied to me since the moment we met. Or how your fucking fans decided to make hate pages about me because someone took pictures of us at the shop. I really wish you would have told me sooner so I atleast knew being your friend had a pricetag."
"Elle please let me explain" he begged and I waited a second before opening the front door.
"I'm going to be late for work." I said before walking away from him and heading to school.
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They kissed and she's a bitch about the fame thing but I get it somewhere. Its kind of a big thing to suddenly find out especially if its because of a screenshot your brother send you.