"you're alone, you're on your own."
"tobio- it's okay- please- i-" you said, breaking into tears. you held the crying boy in your arms.
"it's not." he sobbed into your arms.
"i-"
"stop!"
"so what? have you gone blind? have you forgotten what you have and what is yours."
"i- i'm sorry." you stroked his head. he broke down in your arms once again.
"i miss you. i hate myself. i hate everything. i miss you. when are you coming back? when is everything coming back?"
"i'll be here okay?"
---
"glass half empty, glass half full."
"please don't be like this, tobio." you said, trying to get him to get out of his room.
"it will get better, i promise. but you need to stop being like this." he was going through so much you felt so bad trying to help. his eyes were never so watery, his lips were never trembling this much, he was never this quiet. he turned onto his side, away from you. you heard sobbing. where was he? he had changed. he was in a such depressive state it had ruined him. you teared up as you watched his body jerk with every sob.
"well either way you won't be going thirsty."
"i miss you." you said in barely a whisper before leaving his room. his world was crumbling in front of you. and he wouldn't let you build it up again.
---
weeks passed and tobio hadn't said even one word to you. your world started to crumble too. and he wasn't going to be there like always to build it up again and beyond.
you knocked on his door. he didn't reply.
"tobio- i-"
"go away."
"tobio please. i haven't held you in so long."
"count your blessings not your flaws."
"i can't open the door. it's not locked, come in."
you opened the door. you walked towards the again crying boy. his blue eyes had faded to grey. you wrapped your arms around his shoulders.
"i'm sorry for being such an asshole. i miss your pretty face a lot." his voice had gotten softer and weaker. you looked at his face. he was pale and had gotten thinner. his hair was messy and tangled and his smile was long gone.
"it's okay, i know you're going through a lot at the moment so please don't feel so stressed. i'm just waiting for you to smile again okay?" you wiped his tears from his eyes. you looked at his pillow. it was wet from his tears. you sat next to him on his bed. you kissed his head.
"but if i smile, you'll smile and i'll miss your smile and i'll stop smiling." you felt his grip on you tighten.
"don't stop smiling okay?"
"you've got it all, you lost your mind in the sound."
"but- i can't play volleyball anymore, i can't hold you like i used to and i can't do what i used to." he sighed.
"but you can love. love is blind, isn't it?" you grinned.
"there's so much more, you can reclaim your crown."
"but i can't do both at once. i'm not talented enough okay? i can't see my friends like i used to. my entire world is gone. volleyball was one of the only reasons i bothered to go on. you also helped me along the way. but it's all gone now, there's no point for me anymore." you watched as his crystal clear tears fell onto his bed. your smile faded. the old tobio was leaving with every passing second.
"you're in control, rid of the monsters inside your head."
"please? you can do other things. try your best. you'll get there, i promise." you squeezed his hand. he bit his lip and looked down.
"i'm useless."
"put all your faults to bed."
"none of this is your fault, tobio. it was unexpected. please don't shut everyone out. i think you're still amazing. with all your talent, you can do so much." you said. he cried into your shoulder.
"but my talent was with what was in front of me. now that it's gone, i can't do anything." he sighed.
"but what else can you do with it?"
"stuff."
"i'm sure it's amazing okay?" you stroked his hair as he cried.
"you can be king again."
"i promise you'll still be perfect to me. it doesn't matter what others think. to me, you're amazing beyond what i can say."
---
"you don't get what all this is about, you're too wrapped up in your self-doubt."
"tobio, are you ready?" you held his hand tightly. he bit his lip and sighed nervously.
"will my teammates be angry with me? will they look down on me?" he asked.
"i'm sure they won't be angry with you. you did nothing wrong okay?"
"you've got that young blood, set it free."
"kageyama-kun!" you smiled as a concerned sugawara ran over to the both of you.
"are you okay? it's okay, it's okay, don't cry, i'm here okay? good boy, shh, shh." you smiled as you watched sugawara comfort him.
"you've got it all, you lost your mind in the sound."
"i'm sorry, sugawara-san. i couldn't follow all of you to nationals." sugawara found a place for tobio to sit and comforted him.
"it's not your fault, don't blame yourself."
"there's so much more, you can reclaim your crown."
"you can do other things, you know? you have so much talent in volleyball, but i'm sure you can do something else with that talent." sugawara said, patting tobio's back gently.
"you're in control, rid of the monsters inside your head."
"kageyama! it's okay! i- i- i know you will be very good at something else! um- i don't know what, but i can help you find something!" you giggled as you turned to face a very enthusiastic ball of sunshine.
"hinata boke! i told you i can't do anything already!" watching tobio break down was heartbreaking. he was usually so strong. what happened?
"oh- sorry- kageyama-" hinata looked down. he was tearing up.
"hinata, it's okay." you hugged the middle blocker.
"kageyama- th- thank you- for sh- shaping me into- into what i- i am today. w- without you, i- i would- i would be n- nowhere." hinata said through tears. you stroked his hair as you heard and watched tobio cry.
"you're in control, rid of the monsters inside your head."
"see? you've done so many things, sweetheart." tears welled up in your eyes as you watched sugawara hug tobio. he too was crying.
"but what can i do now?"
"put all your faults to bed, you can be king again."
"many things! i promise!" sugawara said, putting up a brave front for tobio. as you turned around to the rest of the team, you noticed even tsukishima was in shock. yamaguchi was speechless, daichi was frozen.
"yeah! you just have to find somewhere to fit your talent in!" nishinoya said encouragingly.
"i'll try my best."
---
"there's method in my madness."
"tobio, i'm not angry at you for no reason. i hate fighting with you and you know that. the only reason why i'm angry is that you're not trying." you sighed.
"there's no logic in your sadness."
"stop crying, please. if you can't do anything now, then just love me okay?" you hugged him tightly as he rolled his teary eyes.
"you're not going through this alone. you're putting me through a lot too. i wouldn't have minded if you actually tried to at least do something. i would go through all that stress for you okay? but i can't stand that you're not doing anything. i know, you've been through a lot. but at least do something about it, you're not useless now okay? i love you a lot, please don't leave so fast. everyday i see a part of you creep away from me and it breaks my heart. i need your care too. if you want to leave me, i understand. but i don't want to leave you." you sighed. he looked at you and bit his lip.
"you don't gain a single thing from misery, take it from me."
"i'm sorry."
"you've got it all, you lost your mind in the sound."
"i promise i'll love you like i used to."
"there's so much more, you can reclaim your crown."
"i'll try my best to bring the old tobio back."
"you're in control, rid of the monsters inside your head."
"i will try to be better, i'll learn something new."
"put all your faults to bed, you can be king,"
"i'm so sorry. i love you too. i didn't consider your feelings. i should have appreciated you more."
"you've got it all, you lost your mind in the sound."
your lips curled up into a smile.
"good boy." you laid your head on his shoulder. he sniffed and held you closer.
"there's so much more, you can reclaim your crown."
"so what are you going to do?" you asked.
"i'm not sure."
"you're in control, rid of the monsters inside your head."
"but i think i'll probably-"
"probably what?"
"put all your faults to bed,"
"well,"
"you can be king again."
"i'll become the king of your heart."