I flipped off the headlights, careful not to draw attention to the stolen vehicle as we pulled into the parking lot. I could tell Camila was nervous. It was radiating off of her and seeping into my skin. I didn't want her to be nervous. I wanted her to be accepting.
"Camz, we don't have to do this," I told her.
"Can we just go inside?" she said impatiently.
I stepped out of the car and she followed as we entered through the back door of the hotel, tip-toeing quietly to the elevator before I realized I had forgotten to put the spare keys back under the hood of the car.
"Shit, I have to put these back," I whispered, holding them up and dangling them in front of Camila's face so that she could see them in the dim lighting.
"I'm going to go ahead and go up. I'll just...meet you up there," she suggested, her voice shaking.
I nodded and sprinted towards the exit, anxious to return the keys before I got caught. I jogged over to the BMW and placed the spare set under the hood, looking through the windows one last to make sure we hadn't left any evidence. I turned to go back inside but stopped dead in my tracks as I saw a light flip on in one of the rooms above me. I saw Camila's small form approach the window and look out, tapping her foot in anticipation for my return. She shut the blinds and I was left staring at the spot where she had just been. I could tell she was nervous even from fifteen stories below her. I cleared my throat and straightened my posture as I began walking forward. I needed to seem confident, even if I wasn't. Camila would never trust me fully if I couldn't even trust myself when it came to the issue. I needed her to see that there would be absolutely nothing to be afraid of, and if it meant that I had to put on a front, I would do it.
I made it back to the room without getting caught and slipped inside, being extra careful to lock the door behind me. I made my way to the bedroom and found Camila sitting on the bed, her leg bouncing up and down as she bit down on her bottom lip. She whipped around to face me as I entered the room, tensing up at the sight of me but relaxing slightly when she noticed that I didn't appear as nervous as I had before.
"Hey," she exhaled, more tension melting off of her as the breath escaped her lips.
I sat on the bed next to her and took her hands in my own, staring into her eyes so intently that she had no chance of looking away.
"Are you sure? Please be sure," I pleaded.
She closed her eyes and nodded her head. "Positive."
I released her hands and she shifted away from me by just a few inches.
"So...how do we start?" she asked.
I let a small chuckle escape my lips but stopped myself when I saw the serious expression on her face. She genuinely had no idea what she was doing. She was so innocent...I couldn't mess it up for her. It had to be perfect.
"Just relax," I prompted as I leaned forward, placing my hand on her hip and pressing my forehead against hers.
"If I hurt you or if you aren't comfortable with anything, please tell me to stop, okay?" I said.
She nodded, and I pulled her closer to me. I felt her breath against my skin as her heart rate increased and it took every muscle in my body not to rip all of her clothes off right then and there. I kissed her, gently at first, but then deepened it as I felt her press into me. Her hands snaked around my neck and gripped the hair at the base of my skull. I could feel her fingers trembling as she pulled herself even closer to me. I sucked gently on her bottom lip and ran my tongue along it, and she let out a soft moan in response. I slipped my tongue inside the second I got the opportunity, exploring the inside of her mouth. I pushed down on her hip and she removed her hands from my neck, using them to crawl backwards to the middle of the bed. I followed, climbing on top of her and straddling her, one leg between both of hers and the other against her side. I kissed the soft spot behind her ear and she craned her neck in response, granting me easier access as I brushed my lips against her neck. I sucked on her pulse, her hands gripping the shirt on my back. I sat up and pulled it over my head, throwing it on the ground and getting right back to work. I kissed her again but pulled away, bringing her up with me as I sat back up and toyed with the hem of her t-shirt. I pulled it over her head and let my eyes wander. She looked away, clearly self conscious, and I wondered if I had crossed a line.
"Stop doing that," I groaned.
"What?"
"That face. That face you make every time I admire you, like you don't believe anything that I see," I explained.
"I don't," she admitted sheepishly.
"Well, that doesn't really matter, does it?" I teased. "Because you're not the one that gets to do this."
I reached behind her and unhooked her bra strap, allowing the garment to stay attached to her body as I pushed her back onto the bed and trailed gentle kisses across her jawbone, down her neck, and on the middle of her chest.
"Lauren," she sighed.
"Shh, you're perfect," I promised her.
I sat up momentarily and removed my jeans, pulling them off and throwing them on the floor before kissing her again. My hand moved up and down her side and slid up her arm as I gripped the bra strap that sat loosely against her skin and pulled it off of her, our lips never separating. I kissed every inch of her body, my lips finding their way down her abdomen and causing her stomach muscles to tighten in response. I stopped just above her waistline and rested my fingertips on the inside of her thigh.
"Are you still okay?" I asked.
"Yeah," she answered breathlessly, her tone raspy and hoarse.
I continued once she had answered, my hand resting against the fabric of her jeans as I found my way back to her mouth, our lips connecting once again as I rubbed her center. She arched her back underneath me, her hips moving in synchrony with my hand, and I smiled against her kiss.
"You should probably take my bra off," I laughed against her lips.
"Oh...right," she squeaked, her hands immediately unclasping the strap and pulling the garment off of me.
I unbuttoned her jeans and slid them down her legs. She kicked them off and took off her own underwear, doing the same to me soon after.
"Lauren..." she said. "Is this your first time?"
I kissed her once and pulled back, staring into those deep chocolate eyes that I adored so much.
"Yeah, it is," I answered.
She nodded and reconnected our lips. I could taste the desire on her tongue and it burned like fire. I wanted to be with her, no doubt, but I could tell that she craved me in a way that she didn't even know was possible. She wanted to give me every piece of her, and I was more than willing to accept them.
I slipped one finger inside of her, causing her to thrust upward as a small moan escaped her lips. She held onto my hips tightly as though if she were to let go, she would crumble to pieces right in the middle of the bed. We were chest to chest, moving against each other in harmony. The feeling of her bare skin against mine sent chills throughout my whole body. I felt one of her hands move to my center and she inserted a finger inside as well, slowly and unsurely at first, but matching my pace after a while. I felt every breath that she took as her chest heaved with pleasure, felt her heart beat clashing with my own, tasted the spot between her neck and shoulder that caused her to shiver when I sucked on it. I memorized every detail of her.
I pulled back when I reached my climax, a light moan escaping my lips. I continued to work on Camila, knowing that the job wasn't quite done. She jerked upward and let her head fall back onto the pillow, her muscles tightening as she shuddered underneath me.
"Lauren," she moaned, but I cut her off with a kiss and finished, collapsing on the bed next to her as she still lay there, chest heaving and sweat dripping from every pore.
She wiped at her brow with the back of her hand and took a huge gulp of air, letting it all go as she cuddled up to me. I turned on my side to face her, and she buried her face in my chest and pushed herself as close to me as humanly possible. I brushed the stray locks of her hair out of her face, kissing the top of her head and murmuring, "I love you," into her hair.
"I love you too," she answered. "A lot."
I smiled as I felt her breathing steady and knew that she was falling asleep. I couldn't sleep, the events of a few minutes prior replaying over and over in my mind, so I just laid awake thinking about everything that had happened.
It wasn't the most graceful first time, and neither of us had any experience, but it was real. It was simply just us, just like our first kiss, only this time there were no layers of clothes to separate us. It couldn't have been any more perfect. I knew that I wanted her for the rest of my life. Not sexually, not all the time, but just her. The way she was curled up, her naked body against my naked body in our purest forms, and the way her breathing tickled my chest and her hair brushed against my lips. I wanted to feel that every day. I knew at that point that there was no going back. I was undeniably in love with Camila Cabello.
...
My eyes fluttered open, the morning light filtering through the blinds causing the room to glow with so much intensity that it almost gave me a headache. Camila was still sound asleep in the same position as the night before, her bottom lip jutting out slightly more than her top. I kissed her forehead lightly and smiled as I felt her stir, stretching out her legs under the covers and burying her face even further into me.
"If I could wake up like this every day, I could officially die happy," she mumbled against my skin.
She leaned back so that her chestnut eyes could meet my emerald ones and smiled.
"If I could witness and be the reason for your first smile of the day every morning, I think I could officially die happy too," I reciprocated.
"Well that works out perfectly then," she grinned, scrunching up her nose and sticking her tongue out between her teeth.
God, she was adorable.
"Have we already missed breakfast?" she asked, furrowing her brow.
I glanced at the clock on the table behind her and narrowed my eyes, contemplating how much time we had.
"We have about an hour," I told her. "If we hurry, we can probably still meet the girls before they put the food away. Or we could just stay here and cuddle."
"But...I'm hungry," she whined.
I gave her my best puppy dog face in an attempt to change her mind, but she didn't budge.
"How crazy of me to think that I could ever come in between you and food," I said sarcastically, shaking my head.
"I still like you more than food," she told me.
"What?!" I gasped. "Did the Camila Cabello actually just admit that food was her second choice? Unbelievable!"
She slapped my arm playfully and pulled herself out of the bed, slipping on my t-shirt and the same jeans she wore the night before. I followed suit, finding a new shirt and a pair of sweat pants to put on before following her out the door and down to the breakfast buffet.
The girls were still there, and each one greeted us with a wave except for Dinah who kept casting funny looks in Camila's direction. What was her problem? There's no way she could have found out that Camila and I had sex. The door was locked and no one got in. Maybe she was just making assumptions again.
Camila and I made our way to the table and sat down next to each other, the other three girls all on one side of the booth already.
"Hey Mila, new shirt, huh?" Dinah observed, nodding towards my t-shirt on Camila's body.
Shit.
"Yeah, Lauren gave it to me," Camila shrugged.
"Oh, why's that?" Dinah teased.
"All of mine are dirty," Camila answered, not a hint of weakness anywhere in her voice.
"I bet they are," Dinah winked.
She winced as Camila kicked her under the table, ceasing all conversation regarding the topic.
"Well that was extra weird," Normani chimed in. "But anyway, how excited are you guys for the live show tomorrow?"
Each girl spoke up at once as I sat back and tried to listen but found it incredibly difficult. I felt a strong hand on my shoulder, startling me and snapping me from my daze.
"Come with me," Keaton instructed.
I looked at Camila and back to the boy standing over me. Really? Did he have to have such awful timing?
"Keaton, now's not a good-"
"We're going to the pool. There are like fifty fans outside of it. It's the perfect opportunity for us to get out there," he interrupted.
Camila tapped my knee and I whipped around to face her.
"Go," she said. "It's okay. We can meet up later and go to lunch or something."
She gave me a sympathetic smile and I felt that although she meant what she said, it was hard for her to get the words to come out of her mouth. The last thing she needed on the morning after was Keaton interrupting our relationship. That's the last thing either of us needed.
I stood from the booth and followed Keaton out of the dining area. He turned on his heels to face me, looking me up and down.
"You should probably change into something a little more...not that," he suggested.
"It's sixty degrees outside. Why are we going to the pool?" I argued.
"The fans. Besides, it's heated, you'll be fine."
I rolled my eyes and followed him into the elevator, riding up to my room in silence. I changed into a bikini and put my t-shirt back on, not wanting to draw any attention to myself as we walked back through the lobby and out to the pool.
We were instantly met by dozens of screaming fans. They snapped pictures and called our names, holding out photos and various pieces of paper for us to sign. We walked over to them and began signing, which felt strange to me. We were just normal teenagers. We just happened to be on a TV show. It felt so surreal that someone was probably going to hang my handwriting on their wall and fangirl over it. One fan on the end called me over and asked me to sign a photo of me and the girls.
"Where are the others?" she asked me.
"Breakfast. They aren't huge fans of this weather," I laughed.
She thanked me as I handed the photo back to her.
"Um, if you don't mind me asking, are you and Camila like...a thing?" she pressed.
"W-what?" I stuttered, not sure how to react.
"I mean, it's cool if you are. I'm not one to judge. I think the two of you are really cute, actually."
I started to say thank you but trailed off as Keaton appeared next to me, signing a separate photo of Emblem3 for the same girl.
"What are you girls talking about?" he questioned, but something told me he already knew.
"I was just saying how cute Camren is. You know, Lauren and Camila," the girl explained.
"Mmm, yeah, they have a cute friendship," Keaton replied.
I knew my face was red before I even felt the heat. How could he disrespect my relationship like that all for publicity? He nudged my hand and attempted to take it in his own but I pulled away.
"Fuck you, Keaton," I snapped before turning and storming back inside, leaving a very flustered Keaton and fan in my wake.
I rode back up to my room and slammed the door behind me once I was inside, infuriated not only by Keaton, but by the fact that I had let our fake relationship go on for so long. I sat down at my laptop and googled our names, and sure enough there were pictures and plenty of articles regarding our "relationship."
Lauren and Keaton- X Factor's Cutest Couple
Lauren of 5H, Keaton of E3, Television's New Power Couple?
Breaking: Lauren Jauregui and Keaton Stromberg from X Factor Caught Sneaking Around After Party
Unbelievable. The word was already out. There was no turning back. Keaton and I were officially a thing, and I had no control over it anymore.
I heard a knock on my door and shut my laptop, running to open the door thinking that Camila would be standing on the other side. Instead, I revealed a very confused Keaton who stepped inside before I could shut the door in his face. Smart move.
"What the hell was that?" he shouted, his voice high-pitched and clearly annoyed with my behavior.
"How dare you brush my relationship with Camz off as nothing for your stupid publicity stunt!" I yelled back. "That fan didn't even say anything about me and you. She didn't give a single fuck about my 'relationship' with you. She wanted to know about Camz, and then you have to come along and crush both of us at the same time."
"I'm obviously not going to say anything about Camila when you and I are supposed to be together," he argued, his hands flying up above his head and crashing back down against his sides.
"Then don't say anything at all, Keaton! She was asking me, not you."
"We're in this together," he reminded me. "You agreed to it, remember?"
"I'm over it, Keaton. You steal me away from Camz all the time and I'm tired of it. I know it's driving a wedge between the two of us because I can see how hurt she is when she looks at me and tells me it's okay to go. I can't do it anymore. She's more important to me than any amount of fame and clearly I have enough support without your help," I snapped, my frustration towards him finally poking through.
"You can't back out now," he whined. "Just give it a few more days, that's it, and I swear to you, we can fake break up on national television if it'll make you happy. Just a few more days, please."
I wish I could have said no. I wish I could have grown a back bone and told him to get the hell out of my room, but I couldn't find the strength. I was exhausted. All of the lying and rumors and balancing our fake relationship with my real one was too much, and I didn't have the strength to tell him no. I didn't want to hurt him even if he was getting on my nerves. I didn't really blame him for all the drama. He was excited that Emblem3's music was finally out there and he was using whatever opportunity that presented itself to promote his band. I probably would have done the same thing if I were that superficial, but Keaton and I would never be anywhere close to the same person anyway. I could survive a few more days and make him happy, and then it would all be over.
"I'll do it on a few conditions," I compromised.
"Yeah, sure, what is it?" he agreed eagerly.
"We do it for three more days, tops. Any more than that and I announce to everyone that the entire thing was a scam and it was your idea. Second, we do it on my time. If there are fifty fans by the pool and you want to show off, fine, but unless I personally come and tell you about them, don't ask me to join you. Lastly, if you ever pull me away while I'm anywhere close to Camz ever again, I have full permission to kick you in the balls," I concluded.
"I'm not so sure about the last one, but I guess I don't have much of a choice so...deal," he said, holding out his hand for me to shake.
He walked out my room with a smile on his face. At least he was happy, but did that even matter when I felt like I was about to crack under all the pressure? I slumped onto the couch with one question on my mind-
How long would it take for me to snap?