~lol i promise this post won't be TOO depressing~
I'm really good at holding back my tears when other people are around. Like there was one time I was quietly sobbing in the back of my aunt's car and carrying a normal conversation with her and my cousin. Probably thought I was playing with my contacts or something. This morning I was crying again and bitch, as soon as I walked out the door, immediately I got it together. Too bad my eyes get red and puffy in two seconds. So I put my hair over my face because you can tell when I've been crying.
Anyway, remember how I said I'm basically always on the look out to see who is family (LGBT family)? Well, today, I believe I spotted another one of us. Let me tell you how I know. Her mannerisms. Also she had a basketball. I know what a tomboy is and all that, but this girl was family and I'd bet a dollar on it. Now, what irritated me with her was, this bitch (at least I think it was her) was dribbling her ball up and down the goddamn dorm. For the fuck what, ma'am? Didn't your parents/guardians teach you not to bounce that goddamn ball in the house? Why the fuck are you doing it up and down the hall at barely 9 in the morning for? Anyway, she also doesn't know how to avoid people, I think. When I came from the bathroom, she was walking the same way I was, and it didn't occur to her to maybe turn the other way. When I noticed this, I looked at her and she stared me dead in the face, not getting the hint lmao. I was also shook because at this point I also thought she could see my puffy eyes and would randomly tell my business. "Oh, bitch, I was outside and saw this girl who probably just got done crying". Now, I'm sure that wasn't the case BUT WHAT IF IT WAS??? Fortunately and unfortunately (she wasn't unpleasant to look at. ((look at me being a ho, jesus. i'm so sorry)) ... ) she wasn't there to mess up my walking flow when I went back to the bathroom.
The rest of today was lit. Kind of. I mean, I had to go to art class. It's funny because we're usually trying to get our stuff together and she's all like "um, I still have 40 seconds left, and I need them all". I'm exaggerating a bit, but she be doing that silly stuff. You'd think you would stop seeing that stuff in high school lol. BUT I finished my midterm in my 5:00 class in 8 minutes. And we could leave right after. THAT IS A WIN.
Also another thing that made me laugh: I told my mom how upset school makes me and how I feel like I don't have anyone to vent to and she was like "I'll come up there and enroll with you, if that makes you feel better." At first, I was like.......... but that's not gonna solve anything. How does my mother being on campus suddenly cure me of my lack of ASL skills? How does this change the fact that I feel like I don't have any friends in a place I've been in for three years? Duh, my MAMA will be nice to me, lmao. Off rip, I thought of her wanting to be in the same dorm with me. I was like "nahhh, fam." Then I thought of her rooming with a freshman because obviously she would have to start from the beginning (LAWL) and cringed. But she suggested that we would live off campus. SHIIIIIIT, i'm down with that! We finna be a 2017 version of the Parkers. Less debt???? LIT!!! Bye. That would be funny, though, if it happened. It'd be perfect too because my mom is also a deaf ass bitch so this school would be ideal. Plus her bestie just graduated from here.
Also, one thing I realized about my issue with not being able to vent stemmed from not coming here and posting. It's not person-to-person contact like I might prefer, but it's still fun and soothing. Also, y'all don't know who I am lmao. Anonymity is a drug. Some of these people overdose, but I do think this added layer of mystery is great. Even if I told y'all every piece of my business, y'all still cant pick me out of a lineup. Unless y'all scrutinized the shit out of my posts but that would take a good while, playing with me and my vague ass. But I mean, I'm a good person and not a criminal so there's no need for thahaaaat >:) MWAHAWHAWHAW!!!!!!!
I am in the Halloween spirit. I feel like decorating my room Halloweeny but I'm too broke for all that. So, I drew a pumpkin and baldheaded ass trees on our room name badge thingy that's outside of everyone's room. Not the best, but it's cute AF. Plus, we're getting lights. Like I did on Twitter, I'm gonna go through every Halloween costume that I can remember, and the year, if it comes to me.
As a baby:
Pumpkin
Hershey Kiss
Clown - (i hope I was a goddamn baby wearing that bullshit)
As a kid:
Hamburger -- I slightly remember that dumb ass, thin ass costume. I figure I wore that while i was in elementary school
Witch- 5th grade (I think)
Bride- 2nd grade?
Cat - 3rd or 4th grade. I DISTINCTLY remember saying "and you know what the best thing is? I have a tail." I don't know why I remember that so well lol.
Doctor- maybe that was in second grade.... or 3rd... either one of those. I was wearing those lil hairnets but for shoes lol. Galoshes.
Apparently I was a rabbit at one point
My very last costume was of Michael Jackson. I was white Michael so I had the casket ready makeup and the hair flip. Plus a dollar store ass glove with sequins. I also had these cool red glasses.
geography class is pretty trash lol but it's almost over. PUSH THROUGH ALB!!! YOU GOT DIS!!!!