No one's POV:
"It is impossible to fall out of love, love is such a powerful emotion that once it envelopes you, it does not depart..."
Lauren was there, in the place that Zayn called his own, his secret place that he hides all his secrets in. trying to forget him in such a place was so impossible; wherever she looked she found something that reminded her of him.Every tree and every flower there told her one of his stories. the voice of the waterfall splashing on the hard rocks down was making the situation worse; reminding her when he first introduced her to this place, reminding her of all the times she was here with him, reminding her of the secrets he told her while listening to the voice of the water, reminding her of him, everything about him.
All she wanted to do is cry, the pain was too much to bear. And she did, she cried and cried until there weren't any more tears in her eyes to fall. She cried for not being able to admit, she cried because she's not strong to resist him. she cried because she can't have him, because he's not hers; he's for someone else.
The rain started falling from the dark clouds that surrounded the place after she came. the rain drops fell down on her shaking body and mixed with her tears, telling her that it was time for her to go home, but she ignored it. She buried her face deeper between her knees and sobbed harder. The pain seemed not to fade away, his image refused to get out of her head, his words kept running and running in her mind.Everything about him was stuck somewhere in her body, and she just couldn't make them go.
She wiped her tears and got up from her place after noticing that she's been there for a long time. She started walking, Stepping on the wet leaves and branches as she made her way back home. She wished she can stay there, just not to be close to him again, but then her brother would get worried and will start having suspicions, and that was the last thing she'd want to happen.
She kept walking as her legs showed her the way to the home, because her mind was busy doing something else; thinking about him. She finally arrived; she opened the door and went inside, not noticing that her brother's car was parking outside.
"Lauren! Where have you been!" her brother shouted as he saw her getting in.
"Walking.." she answered with one word without looking into his eyes so he can't see how red and puffy they were.
"In this weather? God, look at you, you're dripping! You might catch a cold like Zayn!" he shouted again and she closed her eyes, just hearing the name that she was trying to forget caused her whole body to tremble.
"I'm fine Harry" she answered again as she started making her way upstairs.
"You're fine? Lauren, I don't want you to get sick, look what happened to Zay-" but before He had the chance to complete his sentence Lauren turned her face and started shouting loudly.
"I'M NOT A KID HARRY! I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT, YOU CAN'T TELL ME WHAT TO DO AND WHAT TO NOT. JUST LEAVE ME ALONE!" her voice cracked up at the last word as tears streamed down her wet cheeks, but she quickly wiped them off and ran towards her room, closing the door behind her.she threw her body on the bed and started sobbing loudly to her pillow.
Harry stood there in his place, not able to reply out of shock. He was just afraid that she'd catch a cold; he didn't want her to get sick. why she acted like this? What's wrong with her? Confession was written all over his face as the front door slammed open.
"Hello Hazza.." Liam greeted as he made his way inside, the two other boys following him not long after.
"Are you okay?" Louis asked after he saw Harry's widened eyes and dropped jaw.
"I don't know..." he mumbled, his eyes not leaving the spot where Lauren was standing minutes ago, "but I think there's something going on with Lauren.." he added after a short silence and all the boys started looking at each other.
What is going on?
Days and weeks passed since that day, Zayn's condition started getting better after the first week of his sickness. Watching him in pain was killing Lauren inside, but being unable to do anything for that was even worse. She was fighting herself not to go up to his room. She tried as hard as she can not to see him; she couldn't stand to be near him. She was afraid, afraid that her heart will give up and tell him what she really feels. so she just sufficed herself with checking up on him while he's sleeping and while the boys are not there.
She distracted herself by cleaning and cooking. Harry and the boys were worried about her, they knew that there was something wrong, but yet they couldn't tell what it really was. Harry tried to talk to her many times, but she kept giving him silly excuses which he didn't believe. She knew that she have to be careful and watch her actions around the boys, but it was so hard to do that when Zayn got better and started moving normally in the house.
She locked herself in her room and spent as much time as she can out with Camila. Camila knew that there's something wrong too, her best friend wasn't herself anymore. Harry was telling her about all what's going with Lauren and how strange is she acting, which made Camila more concerned about her friend's situation, she tried to speak to her too but she got the same reaction that Harry got; silly and unconvincing excuses.
Lauren was convincing herself that the pain and the ache in her heart will fade away with time, but that didn't happen. In fact, it was getting worse day after day. The emptiness in her heart reached her soul and trapped her happiness, all her smiles and laughs were forced, nothing was coming out from her heart but tears. And what was annoying her the most that even though this happened because of him, she still wants him so badly.
To be honest she missed him, she missed Zayn so much. That guy who didn't leave her for a second and wiped her tears, the guy who made her forget the pain, the guy who made her feel better, who returned the smile to her face, the guy who changed her... she missed him so much. but it wasn't only about how he made her feel, it was about him too; his smile, his laugh, his hugs, his talk, his jokes, his deep hazel eyes, even that kiss.. Everything about him... She missed everything about him.
Now after one month since that kiss, Zayn got back to his normal life; joking and messing around all the time, which was so hard on her to handle. Today was one of those normal days, when the boys are sitting in the living room and laughing. It was okay with Lauren to hear this, but what she couldn't bear to hear wasZayn's voice as he told them jokes and laughed along with them.
"Harry, I'm going out to see Camila" she told her brother as she wiped her hands from washing the dishes.
"Okay sweetie, but make sure to keep your phone near you. don't get me worried" he told her with a smile and she nodded.
"Don't worry I'll keep it with me" she said as she kept her eyes on her brother, but she can feel someone's eyes burning her with stares, someone with hazel eyes, someone called Zayn.
"Do you need a drive?" he asked and she shook her head immediately.
"No, no I'm fine. I'll take a taxi" she said, not daring to look at him, although she knew that his eyes were on her all the time.
"As you want" he sighed and finally stopped looking at her.
he wasn't happy with the way she started treating him after that day, he noticed how she was trying to avoid him all the time, he knew that he ruined everything with her and there's nothing he can do to bring everything to the way it was before. But he wants her, his feelings towards her didn't change at all, his heart still beats rapidly when he sees her. Yes, she still has that effect that he can't explain on him.
"Don't be late" Harry shouted to her as she waved them goodbye and went to Camila's home.
Today was Camila's day off so Lauren spent the whole day with her. they had a lot of fun, but yet she couldn't stop thinking of him. They watched some movies and talked a bit, Camila tried to drag the words out from Lauren's mouth, but Lauren noticed that and watched every word she said. How hard was that on Lauren, Even with her best friend she wasn't comfortable, she was feeling guilty because she hid such a thing from her best friend that stood with her through all her problems, but she was ashamed of what she did, ashamed of herself and of her feelings towards a taken guy. How she'd tell her best friend that she kissed a guy even thought she knew he has a girlfriend? How she'd tell her that she has feelings for him? She needed a lot of time to admit to herself, how can she admit it to anyone?
The nigh has come and it was getting too late, Lauren had to get back home as Harry told her. She said goodbye to Camila and took a taxi to her home. The ride home took her less than she expected, she arrived in 10 minutes but she felt as they were 10 seconds. She paid for the taxi driver and got out head from the car. she noticed that none of the boys cars were outside, she concluded that nobody at home, just like what she wanted, she wasn't in the mood to talk or to see anybody. She sighed in relief and headed to the front door. She opened the locks with her keys and walked inside.
"Hello, is somebody in there?" she shouted as she took off her jacket, just to make sure that nobody is actually there.
"I'm over here" a voice shouted from the living room causing her to freeze in her place. It was him, the only voice she was running away from...
She took a deep breath and walked in steady steps to the living room."Hello.." she greeted in one word to Zayn, who was lying on the couch and watching TV. he was wearing a white tank top that clung perfectly to his muscled body. Lauren found it so hard not to look at him as she passed the room to get upstairs, but she got her focus back quickly and started making her way upstairs, praying that he won't talk to her.
"Lauren.." he called her name as she put her leg on the first stair. She closed her eyes, not wanting to go through this; she just wanted to reach her room.
So she ignored him, she put her leg on the second stair and started walking, that's when he got up from his place and grabbed her wrist, turning her to face him. She gasped at the sudden move that he made and pulled her arm away from him.
"What do you want?" she yelled on his face and climbed another stair up to stay away of him.
"What's wrong with you? I just wanna talk to you!" he said as he followed her steps. She took another stair up, trying to keep a distance between them. But he was done of this; he climbed more stairs than her and stood on her face, blocking her way so she can't get to her room.
"Move.." she demanded in rigid tone, crossing her arms over her chest.
"I won't move until you talk to me" he said, causing her blood to boil. She tried to pass him but he blocked her way, she tried to run from the other side but he was faster than her and blocked that way on her too. He kept doing this until she lost her patience and started hitting his chest repeatedly with her small fists.
"Just let me go, I hate you, I hate you" she kept hitting him as tears rolled down her now red cheeks. He didn't react; he didn't even try to protect himself from her hits. He just focused his eyes on her and watched her as she cried and shouted that she hates him.
After she let out all her anger on him, she stopped. He kept his eyes on her, waiting for her next move, which was running downstairs towards the front door.
"Oh c'mon now..." he sighed and followed her. She opened the door and ran to the woods, but being faster than her made him stop her by grabbing her wrist before she pass the garden of their house.
"JUST LEAVE ME ALONE, DON'T TOUCH ME" she shouted at him again and tried to get rid of his grip, but he tightened it around her wrist and tried to stop her moves. She kept fighting and fighting to get her hand free but he was stronger than her, which gave her no choice but to bite him.
"WHAT ARE YOU DOING?" he let go of her hand and rubbed the place where she bit him, "ARE YOU CRAZY? WHAT HAPPENED TO YOU!" his voice grew louder, his face turned red out of anger and his eyes darkened.
Lauren didn't move from her place, Maybe it was the hurt in his voice or the pain in his eyes that stopped her from running away, she doesn't know what really stopped her. She stood there in front of him, breathing heavily.
"What happened to me? Seriously?" she asked sarcastically and let out a small laugh, "YOU HAPPNED TO ME, YOU RUINED EVERYTHING..NOTHING WOULD HAPPENED IF YOU DIDN'T KISS ME THAT DAY" she shouted at him, fighting to keep the tears from spilling down her face.
"Why you're blaming me for this? Didn't you want it too? Didn't it mean anything to you?" he asked, his tone was sad and bitter that it made her heart ache
"I... No, I didn't.. I hate you Zayn.. God, I hate you so much" her voice stumbled out as she shouted at him and turned her face so he can't see the tears that started filling her eyes.
But what she said didn't convince him, the tone of her voice told him that she's lying, and the way she turned her face on him assured him that she's hiding a lot more than she shows.
He walked to her and turned her around to face him by grabbing her shoulders with both hands; "Say it, look at me in the eyes and say that you hate me" he whispered and looked deeply into her eyes. She trembled in fear and tried to move away but he held her shoulders strongly "I want you to say it while you're looking straight into my eyes.." he whispered again and tightened his grip on her shoulders "let me go.." she sobbed and tried to push his hands away of her.
"SAY IT, SAY THAT YOU HATE ME, SAY THAT YOU DON'T LOVE ME LAUREN" now he started shouting and shaking her shoulders violently. She winced in pain and closed her eyes shut, her body started shaking and she lost control over her heart...
"I LOVE YOU, DAMN IT I LOVE YOU ZAYN! GOD, I LOVE YOU SO MUCH, I LOVE YOU.." the words came out straight from her heart, she finally said what she's been hiding in a loud scream, "I love you so much..." her voice lost its strength at the final words and she broke down in waterfalls of tears, his grip loosened from her shoulders as she fell on her knees to the ground.
He froze in his place, not knowing what to say or how to react. He didn't except her to say it, and Even if he expected it, nothing can prepare him for such a moment. He was shocked; his heartbeatsracing at a speed he never thought it was possible before.
"Lauren I...." he tried to say but then he stopped; he bent down to touch her face but she pushed his hand away and stood up to her feet, shouting at him again.
"No, Don't say anything.. " she pointed her finger in front of his face and screamed loudly, her voice echoing through the night air.
"Why not?" he whispered, his eyes glint with tears.
"Because it won't change anything, I will never have you Zayn, we'll always be like this, you'd never be mine" she shouted again as she tried to control her loud sobs, everything inside her told her to stop the tears, but she couldn't stop..
"No Lauren, it will change a lot.. I love you.. I love you and I want you to be mine, I want you to stay with me, I want..." he started saying but she interrupted him by screaming loudly, "STOP IT, PLEASE STOP.." she closed her eyes and covered her ears with her hands.
"No, you stop it, stop doing this to yourself, stop doing this to me.." he ran to her and tried to remove her hands away from her ears, "what we want will happen, you have to trust me, just let your heart choose.."
"HE DID, MY HEART ALREADY CHOSEN YOU.." she screamed again, "But that won't change anything Zayn because I know that at the end I'll be the only one who'll get hurt, I'm the only one who'll lose.. I know that I'll lose you at the end... and I'm afraid of that.. Idon't want to lose you.. I can't handle losing you..." and with that she fell again on her knees, covering her face with her hands.
Zayn knelt down to her with tears falling from his eyes too, he put his hand under her chin and lifted it up so she can look him in the eyes, "You're losing me by doing this, you're running away from your feelings towards me, and this is killing me.. I love you with all my heart Lauren, and I want to have you, all of you. I want you to be mine, I'm ready to sacrifice everything just to have you, I'd do anything for you Lauren.. I love you so much.." he leaned closer, so close that she can feel his breath against her face "please, don't do this to me, don't run away from me.. don't break my heart" he breathed, the tone of his voice showing how much he wanted her. She looked at him, watching the tears leaking from his tired eyes, and she saw what she was looking for; she saw the truth..
She lifted her hands up and whipped the tears from his cheeks, he closed his eyes and leaned to her touch, shivers pervading his body at how soft her touch felt against his heated cheeks.
"I'm here, I won't go anywhere. I'll always be here Zayn..I'll always be with you.. just promise me that you won't hurt me.." and that was it, he opened his eyes, a ghost of a smile twitched the corners of his cracked lips. He pulled her closer and wrapped his arms around her trembling body.
"I'd never hurt you...God, I love you, I love you so much" he whispered into her hair, tears falling from his eyes again, but this time they were tears of happiness.
She squeezed her eyes shut and clung to him tighter. he kissed her hair and inhaled her smell deeply, enjoying that she's finally with him, between his arms.The past month was so hard on him, he was struggling to have a look from her. He couldn't stand seeing her away from him,he couldn't handle seeing her in that state she was in; depressed and frustrated. he was blaming himself for ruining everything with her.He was so broken; she totally broke him inside, but know she fixed everything with those words she said. And now with her between his arms, he forgot everything that happened before, like she's never done anything, like he's never been broken before, like he's never been hurt before.
He pulled away from the hug and cupped her face with his hands, wiping the tears with his thumps and giving her a small smile. She smiled back and looked deeply to his hazel eyes, watching as he slowly moved in closer, switching glances from her lips to her eyes.
Her smile grew wider, her breath became heavier, and her heart bet faster as their lips met in a passionate kiss.
He moved his lips against hers slowly at the beginning, but then the rapid pulse of her heart encouraged him to deepen the kiss. So he did, pressing his palms firmly against her waist and bringing her closer into his chest.
She closed her eyes and let herself fall into the kiss, she felt as though she was no longer in control of her body; she felt lifted to another world. Her fingers moved to grip his hair as they hungrily kissed each other, she could feel the heat radiating off his body, surrounding her and enveloping her in a cloud of comfort.
He hadn't felt like this ever, her taste was so sweet and her lips felt like heaven. He just wanted to freeze the time and hold her forever in this position. The warmth that filled his heart and the shivers that ran through his veins were something that he'd never experienced before; not even with Perrie. And it only assured him that she's the one, the one that he should be with. From the first moment he met her, he knew they were meant to be, he only needed time to make her heart believe this.
Their tongues fought as the kiss grew more passionate and intense. His hands grabbed her waist and lifted her body up so she was now sitting on his lap. Her hands moved from his hair to wrap around his neck, pulling him deeper into her mouth.
Once both of them were panting for air they pulled away slowly, not wanting to let go. His lips curved up into a sexy half smile as his palms brushed her lips softly, "Don't you dare to do this to me again... don't you dare to leave me..." he whispered in a low voice, afraid of ruining the perfection of this moment.
"I'd never leave you Zayn. I love you so much, I really do... But I'm afraid-"he cut her off by kissing her again.
"We'll make it work, we'll find a way to make it work" he whispered again after pulling away from her lips. She smiled to him and looked deeply into his eyes "I'm sure we will..." and with that they hugged tightly, their fingers tugged into each other shirts, afraid that if one of them let go, the other will run away.
A/N: Sorry for all the mistakes, I'm so tired to edit anything...
hope you like it !!
Btw, did you watch One irection's new music video? haha of course you all did xD
but anyway I'm gonna to post it with this chapter :)xx