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btws.. (Yes an actual chapter is below) What do you wanna see more of in this book? Lydia x Nicki? Omarion&Ciara? Dricki moments? The kids? The in-laws? The court case? Their therapy sessions? Arguments? Sex? Love? Work? Hard times? Aubrey's friends? Employees? Paparazzi/fans? More interviews&media / social media candids? LET ME KNOW WHAT YALL WANT! (Get that comment section popping)
NICKI POV
At home, all of the kids were awake. I quietly greeted them, as well as Aubrey's parents and Lydia's mom.
"I'm only here for a bit, still easing back into the work flow." I explained. I knelt by where the triplets were playing on the floor, "I missed my babies." I puffed my cheeks out at them, causing them to laugh.
OJ plopped himself into my lap, "What about me Mommy?"
"Of course I missed my baby boy!" I wrapped him in a tight hug.
He opted to join Allison and I upstairs to lay down for a bit. I'll never find a better cuddle buddy than him. Holding him in one arm, with his head resting on my chest reminded why this case was so important. I wasn't fighting against Ciara and Omarion, I was fighting for OJ and I. OJ and everything he knows and loves, everyone he knows and loves. As complex as his family here may be, this is his family, our family, and this is where he belongs.
The next day I arrived at my therapy session, which was conveniently scheduled directly before the Psychologist session.
"Good morning Ms Maraj how are you feeling?" The quaint woman in the pant suit greeted me as she ushered me over to the couch.
"Considering the fact that you are probably completely aware of my current situation, you can imagine my state of mind right now." I sipped my coffee.
"Do you drink coffee often?" She asked as she scribbled something onto her clipboard.
"Yes actually."
"Tell me about yourself?" She sat in the chair adjacent to the couch I was sitting on.
"I.. own a successful business with my best friend, I am a mother and recently engaged." I stated.
"Okay." She scribbled something down.
"Is that sufficient?"
"How many kids do you have?" She looked up.
"4.. 5?" I stuttered.
"precisely?"
"I'm new to this.. my- uh fiancé's daughter considers us like her moms but her actual mom works for me. So its weird I guess? She kinda really hates me."
"The daughter or the mother?" she scribbled.
"The mother.." I replied.
"You say the daughter considers you as her mom. Do you consider her as your daughter?"
"Well, yeah. I guess.. I haven't really thought about it. Aubrey and I haven't necessarily discussed whether or not we were going to legitly co-parent our kids we didn't have together." I explained.
"Okay." She scribbled something down.
"Okay?"
"What were your parents like growing up?"
"Well, they were dead." I said bluntly.
"Do you have siblings?"
"I did at one point, but they also died soon after my parents."
"Did you go into foster care or an orphanage after?"
"No, it was in my parents wills for us to be raised by a relative." I explained, "And before you ask, I wasn't raised by one relative. They all died shortly after I arrived at their houses, I spent maybe 2 months with each person."
"And what family members do you have left now?"
"My last blood relative is who put me through college, she died before I graduated." I sipped my coffee, "So yeah, the only living people who share my blood are my kids."
"Is that what makes the custody battle so important to you? Holding on t-"
"No not at all." I interrupted her, "OJ is my son, even if I had had the picture perfect life, he is still my son. I carried him, I gave birth to him, I raised him and taught him everything he knows."
"What caused you and his father to separate?"
"We- we were never together." I stuttered.
"So it was a one night stand?"
"No.. I wish it could've been." I rolled my eyes.
I watched her scribble something down.
"I was engaged to my best friend, who is a woman. We wanted to raise a child together and we didn't want to adopt. So, we decided that it shouldn't be too hard to find a man willing to get me pregnant." I depicted, "When we met Omarion, he told us he had no intentions on ever having kids, his only request was that if the child was a boy, he'd be a junior. But he made it clear that he didn't want to be in the child's life."
"What do you think changed?"
"His new wife. Out of no where, he calls me and asks to meet OJ. I let them stay at my house, I thought I was being nice."
"Did something happen?"
"She told me she couldn't have children, so she tried to guilt me into having their child." I admitted, "Ever since I told her no, everything went downhill."
"You have a new fiancé now?"
"Yes."
"What's he like?"
"He's really sweet, and he is constantly concerned about me." I bit my lip.
"Do you argue?"
"Yeah.. but thats normal right?"
"What do you argue about?"
"Mostly.. Lydia."
"Your ex?"
"My bestfriend" I corrected.
"What about her?"
"I don't know, the things she does or says or wears.. How close she and I are.." I shrugged.
"How often do you argue about her?"
"Sometimes it feels like everyday." I admitted.
"Does she know?"
"She and I tell each other EVERYTHING." I crossed my legs.
"Where do you draw the line?"
"We- don't. She's the one person I trust more than anyone else in the world." I replied.
"Do you share as much with your current fiancé?"
"I wish I could." I sighed.
"but??"
"He's kind of hotheaded."
"If you and Lydia are so close, how did you end up in a second relationship?"
"Lydia and I kept our relationship a secret, no one except her mother and OJ knew we were together. When we met Aubrey, he fell for me instantly. We figured he was only in town for a few weeks, it would be fun to.. lead him on.. I guess." I tried my best to not sound like Lydia and I were complete jerks but the more I spoke, the more it became evident to me that were in fact assholes. "In doing so, I noticed he had actually fallen in love with me. And I felt myself falling in love with him."
"What happened?"
"I told him that I couldn't trick him any longer, I confessed that I was already engaged to Lydia."
"How'd he take that?"
"He completely hated me. Lydia was temporarily pissed at me for not telling her before- revealing our secret."
"But they got over it?"
"Lydia got over it. She actually lead me to the decision of leaving her for him."
"How's that?"
"She told me that, if I chose her... He'd leave and that'll be a piece of me I'll probably never get back. But if I chose him, our friendship would still be just as strong, and we'd still have each other no matter what." I felt myself blinking away oncoming tears as the recollection of events brought back the emotions I had then.
"Did he ever get over it?"
I shook my head, "I think part of him will always hate me, hate her, and hate the thought of Lydia and I together... because of what we did back then."
"Do you regret it?"
"Tricking him? or choosing him?"
"Both."
"If we had never tricked him, I would've never fallen in love with him. The triplets would have never been born. But if I hadn't chose him, I wouldn't have to second-guess myself and my friendship as often. Either way, life would be different if either hadn't have happened."
"What happened the night of the accident?" she changed the subject.
"We had an argument."
"About Lydia?"
"Partially."
"What was it about?"
"It was a stupid fight, it escalated too quickly." I recollected.
"What was it about?" she repeated.
"We both overreacted.. He said something about Lydia being manipulative... and I mentioned a prior event that had nothing to do with her.. and it just blew up from there.."
"Then what happened?"
"I stormed out.. OJ didnt want me to leave him so I took him with me. I voided Aubrey's calls, and I texted Lydia to tell her what happened. I didn't tell her where I was going.. it was the first time I didn't tell her.."
"Where'd you go?"
"Out of town, to an ice cream place I remember going to as a kid. It was nice there, OJ loved it.. We met a little girl there. Everything was fine for once that night."
"When was the accident?" She sounded confused.
"When we left the restaurant, the tunnel to get back to New York.. after the millionth call from Aubrey, I answered the phone. He was screaming in my ear... and I guess thats why I didn't notice the truck sooner."
"You lost your memory, hearing and sight right?"
"Yes"
"Was that before or after you supposedly threw OJ out of the burning car?"
"The doctors say I lost everything immediately. But I know that I blacked out on impact, when I woke up... everything was fuzzy I guess, my vision, hearing, memory.. now that I think about it. But I could SEE and HEAR my baby's fear."
"So you don't believe the doctors?"
"Aubrey says that after the crash I picked the phone back up, and I was apparently completely out of it by then.."
"Then what happened?"
"I blacked out again, still inside the car.. I woke up days later in the hospital without my vision or hearing."
"Have there been more or less arguments since the accident?"
"Neither.. its- the same."
"Do you want to be able to tell him everything, like you do with Lydia?"
"Yes.. of course."
"If you could tell him one thing right now that you haven't told him before, and you could be assured he wouldn't get angry about it.. what would you tell him?"
I took a deep breath, "I would tell him... that Lydia and I are still in love with each other. That we will always be in love with each other, but that that has no effect on my relationship with him. That I need him to trust that the love I have for him will keep me faithful to him. And that the love Lydia has for me, would never allow she and I to ruin what he and I have."
"Why can't you tell him that? That sounds reassuring.."
"He asks me everyday, if I'm still in love with her. He wants me to say yes, he wants to be right."
"Is he right?"
"About the wrong things." I felt the tears fall.
She handed me a tissue.
"He wants me to tell him that there is a possibility that I will either leave him for Lydia, or cheat on him with Lydia. But there isn't."
"Did you tell him that?"
"Everyday." I nodded, "He refuses to believe it."
"Is there anything you haven't tried?"
"I don't know what to try. He doesn't trust me."
"Because of what you did."
The psychology session that immediately followed proved to be very similar to the therapy. I was surprised by how quickly I subconsciously opened up to both doctors. By the time I left, I felt.. vulnerable. Lydia and Aubrey talking to each other when I got to the office.
"Am I interrupting?" I asked.
"You look flushed." Lydia observed, "Im guessing it didn't go to well?"
I leaned on her desk, "I feel flushed."
"Go lay down for an hour. I'll bring you something to eat in a bit and we can talk." She kissed my forehead. "Don't worry about work, I'll keep you caught up."
"I swear you're like God-sent or something." I groaned.
"Give me a huggggg because I missed you. And then go relax." She instructed as she pulled me into a hug, kissing my forehead again.
"Thanks." I smiled at her.
"Nic, you sure you don't wanna talk?" Aubrey asked.
"Whats there to talk about? Everything is fine right?" I mimicked his demeanor from yesterday before heading into my office.
LYDIA POV
"Don't follow her." I grabbed Aubrey's arm to prevent him from bothering Nic.
"You can't tell me you didn't see the difference between how she just treated you and how she treated me." He claimed.
"Well, I wasn't a total dick to her yesterday." I shrugged.
"So in the midst of her borderline ignoring me yesterday and this morning, she had time to vent to you about me?" He sounded aggravated.
"One of us has to keep her sane." I rolled my eyes.
"So what does she say?"
"Everything."
"Like what?"
I noticed Nic had left her phone on my desk so I pointed to it, "Why don't you see for yourself?"
"Its locked." He stated.
I put my thumb to her home button and unlocked her phone for him. "If you want to know so bad, check our messages."
"Are you trying to set me up?"
"Neither of us have anything to hide." I admitted, "And if you ever asked Nic to see anything on her phone, she wouldn't hesitate to let you see it."
"And why do you have free access to my fiancée's phone?" He questioned.
"Because she has free access to mine." I snapped.
"By the way, you won't find anything special in there unless you scroll back to when she and I were still together." I informed.
DRAKE POV
She was right. As I scrolled through their messages, they were no different than how they spoke to each other in person when I'm around. They reminisced occasionally, they talked about OJ, or the triplets, or work, or me. But I did want to know how Nicki depicted yesterday's fiasco.
N: Just a heads up.. I'm headed home for a little.
L: Everything okay? Lmk when you're there.
N: The usual 🙄
L: Yikes.. was it bc of me again😩
N: No actually.. Ig it was just me.
L: Drive safe.. explain when you get home
-
-
N: Home now.
L: What happened?
N: idk really.. he was kinda like absent or whatever since he got back from the therapy session..
L: Did you ask how it went?
N: He refused to talk to me about it.
N: Ig he doesn't get how fucking stressful this is for me?? I mean.. part of the judge's decision is going to be based off of whether or not the therapist deems him as a potential threat to OJ and I.
L: Maybe thats why he wont say anything Nic
N: ?
L: He doesnt want to worry you / stress you out
N: Well Im even more stressed out now😣
L: Im sure that wasnt his intention
L: What happened at lunch?
N: I got paranoid. A group of girls recognized me but were too shy to approach me... so they stood there staring and whispering to each other.
N: So like.. you know..
L: Got it.
L: Did you tell Aubrey?
N: I mentioned it..
L: But did you TELL him
N: Even if I wanted to.. he brushed it aside anyways then the waitor came.
L: So at what point did you leave then?
N: After he literally told me "The way you're acting I think I need a beer" 🙄
L: That was a shitty move
N: So I told him I needed to leave
L: how'd he take it?
N: I think he was afraid if I stormed out on him again.. it would be like last time.
L: Like the night of the accident?
N: Yeah..
L: Aren't we all tho??
N: That was a one time event.. Everything happened too fast that night
L: ik babe, but the effects of it will probably never go away.
N: But Im FINE now. So is OJ
L: Yet they were able to bring it up in court Nic, it happened. We can't change that night.
L: wyd rn?
N: I'm laying with OJ and Allison rn..
L: Are you coming back to the office?
L: Did you eat?
N: Thats the plan.. and no, but im not really hungry.
L: Ahh yes.. but I have a salad with your name on it in my office waiting.
N: It better be Caeser 😣
L: Duhhh what do you take me for?
N: Fineeee
L: Get your rest hun, Im just a text/phone call away when you wake up.
-
-
N: Im up, I'll be there soon
L: How are you feeling?
N: Eh. Just trying to rationalize something😝
L: Do I even want to know? 😰
N: I think I still need/want to be angry with him for a little bit..
L: Ig thats fair..
N: But is it possible to be mad at him, have sex with him tonight, and still be mad at him a little longer tomorrow?
L: Is he that bad of a lover😬
N: Ofc not 😉 but you know what I mean...
L: How are you gonna have sex with someone you're mad at?
N: Umm was I ever happy with Omarion 🤔
L: Fair point..
L: But don't do that Nic. Just wait til you're done being angry with him (which you aren't in the first place).. Have sex afterwards, it'll be worth so much more.
N: The lack of sex may prove detrimental 😩
L: Speaking of your husband.. he's waiting for you in your office when you get here.
N: GOD..
N: Can you PLEASE ask him NICELY to give me some space?
N: I'll eat the stupid salad
N:Why aren't you respondingggg
N: You better be asking him.
N: i'm here, and you still haven't responded
N: Lydiaaa wtf
N: Im in the elevator
N: You were JUST typing
N: Really hating you rn 😒
N: Answer me..
L: Yeah yeah I told him. 😂😂
L: Just loved watching you freak out
N: You suck😑
L: I don't actually.. but you do😶😉
N: ykw😐😐😐
I assume that was the point when Nic exited the elevator because the next thread were from later that day. I scrolled down to find out about her therapy session, but a new message from Lydia popped up.
L: Are you done?
I looked up at Lydia, she had her feet up on the desk with her legs crossed on her phone.
"Did you find what you were looking for?" She asked without looking up.
"Sorta" I shrugged putting the phone down.
"Its been half an hour.. did you read every message we ever sent? Or did you go through her photos too?" She still never looked up.
"Why is there something in her photos I should know about?" I pried.
"You can't tell her that I let you into her phone. Nor can she know that you read our messages." She warned.
"So you did set me up?"
"No, but if you let me be the one to tell her.."
"Then what? It makes it okay when you say it?"
"I know how to make you not sound like a jealous dick." She rolled her eyes.
"I really fucking hate you Lydia." I spat.
"Yikes, with that temper we'll never win the case." She taunted.
"And you're not helping."
"You know what? You tell her about this then." She stood from her seat and glared at me, "Go ahead and show her how much you still don't trust her. Show her that no matter how much time passes, and how much she tries.. you will never trust her. And while you're at it, show her that you really don't care if we win this case-"
I gripped her by her collar, she stopped talking, but her demeanor was still just as bold.
"What the hell are you two doing out here?" Nic appeared in the doorway of her office. It wasn't until she brushed her hair out of her face and into the bun she was forming that she saw the extent of our argument. "What- the fuck?!" She dropped her hair and it fell messily back down.
I let Lydia go. Lydia began throwing paper work into her bag.
"Im leaving." She announced.
"No!" Nic screeched, her face was red and tears were streaming down her cheeks.
"Nic.." Lydia exhaled.
"You need to go into your office, and you're gonna tell me exactly what the fuck is going on." Nic's screeching didn't stop as she directed Lydia into her office. As Lydia closed the door, Nic kept her head down, I thought she was calming herself back down.
"And you're going to wait for me in your office.. and Aubrey I swear to God if your story doesn't match up I'm fucking over it." She hissed at me, "And if you're not in there waiting for me, you better be on your way back to fucking Canada."
With that she stormed into Lydia's office. I saw a rare form of her in that moment, but I recognized it as built up frustration and it wasn't anything I could hold against her. I retreated back into my office and sat in my chair, staring out the window.
NICKI POV
"Did he hit you?" I asked Lydia through my teeth.
"No Nic. He just likes to grip me up by the collar of his shirt because its the only way he can feel like he has control over me." She rolled her eyes.
"This wasn't the first time?" I blinked at her.
"He did it the night of the accident after he practically snatched my phone out of my hands." She explained.
"But- you didn't tell me.." I was hurt.
"Nic, when was I supposed to tell you something like that? By the time I got to you that night you were on your death bed. Then you didnt even know who we were anyways. Even after that, you had bigger things to worry about. Eventually I forgot! I forgot until he just did it again." She pleaded.
"I sat in that courtroom and thought those people were crazy. He would never turn his anger into anything physical... And here I am finding out he is literally on the verge of abusing the most important woman in life." I monologued.
"Babe, its not like that.."
"So what happened this time?"
"His usually jealousy.. So I let him read our messages, to assure him that you and I have nothing to hide." She ran her fingers through her hair.
"Then what?"
"I told him to let me be the one to tell you that it happened. It just blew up from there."
"So at what point di-"
"Right before you came out, I ADMITTEDLY stepped completely out of line okay? I taunted him, I egged him on. It was built up frustration with the case and worrying about whether or not your sessions went okay.. worrying about how mine are going to go." She confessed, "I'm not defending him, I'm just being completely honest with you, and I'm owning up to what I know I did wrong. And I am definitely not justifying what you just saw."
"Is that all?" I asked, a lot calmer now.
She nodded. We both wiped our tears and hugged for a few moments.
"You still mad at me?" She asked.
"I was never mad at you.. I was frustrated with everything, and I'm sorry I had to take it out on you." I kissed her forehead. "Don't keep anything else away from me ever again.."
"Next time I'll write you a note." she joked.
"What am I supposed to do about this though? With him?" I sighed.
"I'm going to tell you the same thing I told you before.. You're in love with him, so if you let him go.. a part of you will leave with him. But I'll be here for you. And if you forgive him, you won't lose him.. and I will still always be here for you." She assured me.
"Do you think he would ever-"
"No Nic. Honestly? He would never hit me either." She shook her head.
"You think so?"
"I know so." She laid her head on my boobs.
"The sessions were fine by the way. I just opened up a lot more than I thought. They're good at what they do. Depending on how his went, I think we are in pretty good shape." My hand rested on the side of her boob.
"Are you still planning to have sex with him tonight?" She asked.
"Depending on how he is, and how I'm feeling tonight." I shrugged.
"Go talk to him Nic, the suspense is gonna kill him." She got off of me.
I entered his office, he was staring out the window in his chair.
"Is there a point in me saying anything?" He grumbled.
"I just want to know what happened." I sighed.
"You heard her story, thats the only story you're going to believe anyways." He turned to me.
"Is that what you think?" I folded my arms.
"Nic... I'm not the bad guy here."
"I want to hear, from you what caused the picture I just saw. What happened from the time I went into my office, to the time I opened that door." I demanded. "Thats it, we can figure out the rest from there."
His story matched hers.
"Nic I don't know what came over me, she just pissed me off.. everything she was saying-"
"okay.. and how come you didn't tell me about the last time you did that to her?" I displayed no emotion.
"Because you would've hated me Nic. I fucked up so much that night, how was I supposed to tell you that?" He replied guiltily.
"I understand." I exhaled.
"So.. what does this mean?"
"It means.. that after hearing both sides of the story, neither of you are at fault.. But you do need to understand that you will NEVER put your hands on her again." I told him.
"Got it."
"Okay."
"Are we good?"
"Do you trust me?"
"Yes."
"But this is after you went through my phone.." I pointed out.
"Im sorry Nic."
"I don't care that you went through my phone. I dont care that Lydia opened it for you. Its just the fact that the reason why you did it was because you didnt trust me." I explained, "Yesterday you asked me for my phone, and I gave it to you- no questions asked... Today you're going through Lydia to get into my phone?"
"I don't know what you want me to say."
"Im just gonna continue ranting until you come over here and hug me so we can kiss and make up." I told him.
"What?" he looked at me confused.
I let out a giggle. "Come hereee."
"You mean to tell me, Lydia didnt seize the opportunity to drag my name through the dirt?" He stood and approached me.
"She wouldn't lie to me. And if it makes you feel any better.. she took the blame better than you did." I told him as his arms snaked around my waist. "You gonna tell me how far you got in those messages? Or.."
"No way." He planted kisses down my jaw.
"Damn it."
"But I'll tell you that I'm pretty bummed out about last night.. so I'm hoping tonight will be better." He hinted.
"You have no idea." I shook my head as his kisses hit my cheeks.
"Enlighten me." his kisses began making their way back up.
I took his hand and guided it down my pants, "Your exclusive sneak peek." I whispered as his lips crashed into mine.
When we pulled away, he licked his fingers clean. "I oughta take you home right now."
"I'm kinda surviving off of a venti coffee for the day.. So I can't promise that my energy levels will meet your standards right now though." I ran my fingers through his hair. "Can you wait patiently until tonight? And hopefully by then I'd have eaten something..."
"Only because you're worth the wait." he pecked my lips.
"I love you." I told him.
"I love you too." He kissed me once more, "I'll grab you lunch."
"Lydia might've beat you to it." I bit my lip.
"Doesn't she always?"
I couldn't tell if he was joking or not so I faked a slight giggle and changed the subject.
"As much as I enjoy privately making out with you in your office, I still have a business to run." I snaked my way out of his grip and held his hand instead.
We walked out into the lobby and Lydia was just arriving on the elevator with a shit ton of stuff in her hands. She placed everything behind her desk before handing me two containers and a cup of coffee.
"Pasta and salad for Ms Maraj." She announced as she balanced my phone on top. "So that you can get back to work in a timely fashion."
"Thanks." I smiled.
"Anytime."
"Are you two safe around each other?" I clarified as I opened the door to my office.
"Don't you worry your pretty little head about us. We are both mature adults and I left my boxing gloves in the car." Lydia winked.
"You're a mess." I cackled.
"I couldn't agree more." She waved me into my office.
DRAKE POV
"I have something for you as well." Lydia told me after Nicki was gone.
"Really?"
"Think of it as.. a peace offering." She handed me a container and a beer. "Granted, I have no idea what you like.. so a roast beef sandwich and cold one is the best I can do."
"Thanks."
"We may bump heads a lot, but there's one thing we can agree on.. and thats Nic's happiness and well being." She ranted, "I can't stress to you enough that I'm not trying to break you two apart. Onika is my best friend and she loves you dearly, I interfere in your relationship because she isn't used to dealing with hard parts of relationships."
"She and I both know that you're not gonna get over the slight distrust you have in her when it comes to me. You two fight about it all the time. You get frustrated because you can't be as close to her as me, but honestly.. I'm not the one stopping you. I push Nic everyday to open up to you more, to be more patient with you.. in the same ways that I try to get you to understand her more. You have a temper, thats the only thing holding her back." She rambled on.
"You have a temper too, and so does she." I reminded her.
"Yes but we've learned to not be angry with each other. She's open with me because I know that if she took the time out and built up the courage to tell me something important or personal, the last thing she needs is for me to make a big deal about it." She countered. "Shes the same way with me. Thats why I offered to be the one to tell her.. Not because I thought I was better than you or anything, from experience, I know how to tell her things without it becoming a big deal."
"And if you haven't noticed, as professional and serious that woman is. She is goofy as hell, so when all else fails, just joke around with her.. you see me do it all the time." She took a swig of her coffee, "It lightens the mood, and it calms everything down."
"Is that your secret?"
"I have many secrets, but thats one of them." She winked. "Do you accept my peace offering or not?"
"You two really spend too much time together." I shook my head.
"What makes you say that?" She jokingly put her hands on her hips.
"You act just alike." I said, referring to the resemblance between how she made her peace offering and how Nic behaved in my office before the make out session.
"You still haven't answered my question."
"Yes I accept your peace offering."
Qotd: Do we honestly believe Lydia and Drake can keep the peace?
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