Dedicated to lunarvampiregirl15 because her username gave me an idea-okay well, her username did after she gave me her idea....don't ask me how, it just did, and this is what i came up with
I don't know how it happened but somehow my brother found out. Geez, I thought he was gone but no, he came back. This time his intentions were pretty harmless. He wanted me to go live with him. My sister objected to this completly. She refused to let him. He claimed she had no choice in the matter. We got the Alpha of my pack involved. I'm telling you I was on my knees groveling and begging him to say no.
During that time a few Vampires tried to kill me-fifty bucks says he was somehow involved in this-but I got out alive.
My friend-the one he'd turned into a Vampire-started comming to visit me. He worked out a compromise. I'd go with him and not the other guy. He'd stil be able to visit me, but at least I wasn't in his house alone with him. Liam was a Vampire. I'd ignored the fact but now I was going to have to face it. Then came the second blow. Sonia was a Vampire as well.
Three days later I had all my bags packed and left for his house-mansion more like it-where he lived with Sonia. I'd lived with my Vampire sister long enough to know that chaos was pretty much part of the deal. The house was huge, but I'm telling you everything was either white or the color of blood-news flash woman, vampires live here. What did you expect? A few things were a different color but it wasn't that much.
They showed me my room and left me to unpack my stuff. I unpacked and then walked out of the room. I wasn't wearing heels and neither was Sonia. We both knew nothing would ever end well with either one of us in heels-seriously, even though she was a Vampire she was still the world't biggest klutz.
Three days later my brother visited. It didn't turn out how you'd expect. Liam and a Werewolf from a Pack near ours had to pretty much stand there and babysit us to make sure my brother didn't kill me-okay well, eat me but you get the idea.
It was freaking weird. We just stood there witout speaking for a long time. Since I'm a human my leg started to cramp so I shifted my weight to my other leg. That one cramped as well. I sat down on the couch.
"Finally someone moves." Liam said.
I laughed. "I'm a human you moron. I can't stand still for a hundred years witout cramping."
"Sonia would be insulted if she heard that."
"Why?"
"Your implying that she's old. Isn't that every woman's nightmare?"
"A Vampire with a sense of humor."
"Hey, its still me."
"Yeah, the only difference is that now your sparkly, and now you kill thumper and bambi." My tone was light but I could see that I'd offended him.
"I'm sorry about saying that you ate bamber and thumper." I apologized.
He laughed.
"Why are you laughing?"
"I'm offended because you compared me to Cullen. Not because you implied that I ate bamber and thumper." He told me.
"its BAMBI YOU IDIOT! BAMBI! BAMBI! BAMBI! NOT BAMBER DAMMIT!" I exploded.
That made us both laugh.
Sonia showed up and then everything calmed down. Was it just me or had she gotten louder? We laughed and started joking about random stuff. Sonia was still new to the Vampire thing and she still thought a lot about blood but I could see that she was making an effort to try and not rip my jugular out. She stayed for as long as she could. After about two hours she had to leave because her thirst just go the best of her.
Liam shook his head sadly. The others left and he showed me around the house. They'd gotten me a dog for some reason. I don't know why they'd done it but I was okay with it as long as they didn't eat him.
The night came. I went to bed and Sonia left to go hunt. Liam stayed in the house doing whatever it is Vampires did at night aside from hunting.
The next morning I woke up with not a single Vampire bite. It was stupid but I had to supress the urge to start jumping up and down with joy.
They got me a dog the next day but Sonia lost it completly and ate my dog-thankfully not me though. Sonia ate five more of my dogs. When she ate the seventh one Liam started making her go hunting a lot more than before. Sonia didn't complain about it. She was happy that she got more blood and apparently bunnies smelled better than my blood. I seriously don't know if thats an insult or a compliment. We didn't get another dog.
It was still weird. Liam could come back from the hunt looking just like he had when he'd left, Sonia was another matter. She showed up bloody and with her clothes torn. Eventually she got better at it, but those images haunted me. I swear she was bloody mary in person.
Sonia and Liam went out on more hunts and things became as normal as they could when your a human living with two Vampires. Meals were a weird thing because they only hunted once a day and then sometimes at night while I ate three times a day every day.I always at while they just watched or stood there talking to each other. Liam tried to hide his disgust when I ate normal food. Sonia however, could not mask her disgust her the food I was eating. Apparently It smelled disgusitng to them.
We started chatting about thingst hat were more or less normal. Liam always had to babysit Sonia because sometimes she lost control. She hadn't bitten me yet. I could see it in her face, she hated loosing control around me. I hated seeing her like that.
"Wanna see me eat a cow?"
I said yes because I didn't actually think she was going to DRAG THE COW HERE AND DRAIN ITS BLOOD IN FRONT OF ME. I bolted once the cow died because that was just nasty. Dude, she ATE A COW IN FRONT OF ME. Am I supposed to be cool with that?
My brother tried to visit me more than once but they hid me. They had me hide in the cellar. That place smelled bad enough to me, well, what does it smell like to a vampire with senses a million times better than mine? He never found me. Heck, he stopped comming after the first few times. Was there garlic in here?
Sonia kept trying to master her self control. She still couldn't stand to be near me for more than a few minutes before she had to run and try to kill something so that she wouldn't end up killing me.
Liam and I did all sorts of things together for fun. I felt bad because the most I could do with Sonia was talk.
Liam and I did so many crazy things together. At some point he threw me off a cliff and he caught me before I killed myself. Instead of punching him myself I got Sonia to do it for me. I'd always done that. It eased some of the tension, and that was all that i could ask for at this point.
We played a million chess games. I could still beat Sonia even though she was a Vampire, but I still couldn't beat Liam. It had been impossible when we'd both been human, now it was just something I was never going to do, but that I still tried to do. It gave us something to do during the days-okay well, until Sonia threw a fit and ate my chess peices, but she spared the checkers. What the hell? Since when does she like checkers?
Sonia killed me every single time we played checkers and she took great pride in rubbing each and every one of her victories into my face. She was still the same Sonia I remembered. The only difference was that now she might accidentally kill me... I tried not to dwell on that fact but It kept showing up in my head no matter what i did to try and shove it away.
Three days later Sonia got so high It wasn't even funny. HOW WAS I SUPPOSED TO KNOW THAT VAMPIRES COULD GET HIGH? After that Sonia raped the couch.
Liam ended up acting all fatherly. It was halarous to watch him scold Sonia time and time again.
At some point Liam made steak and the three of us ate it. I was laughing myself to bits. Wasn't steak supposed to kill Vampires? Okay, I know it didn't but I couldn't help it. When I thought they weren't looking I threw in some garlic. They didn't notice but I laughed myself to bits.
Liam left and then Sonia started screaming in the middle of the night. i got to thier room and Liam's in bed with a....am I going blind or is that a Zombie? I turned on the light. Yup.He was cheating on her with a decaying corpse. Ow man. That was a low blow.
Sonia start screaming something about their child at wich point Liam pointed out that they couldn't have a child and then they commited the ultimate act of love together. They murdered the headboard, massacared the bed, slaughtered the sheets, and I'm telling you Sonia bit a few pillows. Murder is the ultimate crime of passion. That was very weird to watch.
After that they went and killed a few animals together to complete the honeymoon.
Liam brought a stripper back and the screams I heard that night weren't the screams that love caused. Okay well, she wasn't dead the next day, but those screams did not come from love.
Sonia got jealous of a slutty blonde and ripped her head off. They made amends by eating her togehter-okay, drinking her blood together-while I threw up in the bathroom. That was nasty. Very nasty.
A Vampire Hunted showed up. Liam ate him. Sonia got mad at him because he hadn't saved any blood for her.
He robbed a blood bank.
She refused to talk to him.
"I got AB blood..." He said waving it around.
She glanced at it for a moment, then started drooling, then stalked out of the house and drained some cute bunnies of thier bunny blood.
Liam turned to stare at me. "She never turned down AB blood before." He told me, with the injured puppy look. Yeah, a human raised by Werewolves knows SO MUCH about how Vampire romances work.
I called my sister and asked her for help.
She gave me sermon about Vampire romances that lasted over three hours. I know that becase I fell asleep, and when I woke up again she was still talking.
Geez she's no help.
They were completly fine the next day. What the?
Sonia wanted to go shopping. I didn't want to go shopping with her so she threw me over her shoulder and littearlly walked to the mall with me over her shoulder. We got a lot of weird looks from people. And of course Liam came along to make sure she didn't eat me. He sulked the whole way because he didn't understand the female mind.
A month later Sonia got so desperate for blood she bit Liam thinking that he was going to bleed. Liam stared at her like she was insane and then yanked his arm out of her mouth. She bit him again. And again. And again. She just kept bititng his arm.
Would someone please tell me why Sonia wants to eat Liam?
The house somehow blew up while Liam was trying to make panckakes.
"NOW WHAT?" i screamed at them while looking at the remains of the house.
"We move in with the Elves." They both said like it was obvious.
"You have got to be kiddind me." I yelled.
"But I already booked up a room."
"I am not moving in with Elves." Sonia said.
"Why?"
"They get all freaking prissy when I kill something."
"Hey Liam, are Elves tasty?" I don't know what the hell made me ask him that.
"They taste like vegetarian humans." He replied.
"What do they taste like?"
"Never eat a vegetarian human. Its the nasties human you could ever eat." Sonia told me.
"Righ, i'll keep that in mind If I ever become a canibal." i toldher.
"Hey, its better than a vegan." Liam countered.
"There still nasty." Sonia snapped.
They argued over the taste of vegans, vegetarians, and normal humans for over three hours.
By the end of that I was considering stakeing them.
Anyone have some well done steak? Meadian rare? Rare? Seriosuly people, no steak?