Chapter 14- His Hidden Thoughts
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Dear Journal,
My life started out grand, my parents loved me and cared for me as if I weren't a monster with odd eyes..
They called me "unique" through the beginning of my childhood, always having great faint in me being successful in the life of my future.
That was, until my true well being went unleashed when I was thirteen...
Abilities and the power I had, I had no control and no common sense to think it could all mean horrifying consequences...-
"Estelle, you okay?" I hear Rangel ask me through my dark room.
I throw my blanket over my head as he flips on my fan light, shoving Leon's journal under my pillow quickly to not be seen.
After the whole dinner being 'nasty' and 'too burnt to eat' even though I had dished it out anyways, the boys basically exploded on me.
All the sexist comments thrown my way...
"Why do we have a girl roomie when she can't even cook?"
"We should have her for dinner then."
I raced upstairs disgusted, slamming my door and burying myself in Leon's hidden thoughts.
"Yeah, go and enjoy the game with Jackle," I reply. "Don't worry about me."
Rangel yanks the blanket from me, my heart racing as he sat down next to me, gazing at my red cheeks and puffy eyes from feeling weak and inferior.
"Don't look at me like that," I say, voice congested. "I do everything for you guys, then you treat me like shit. Screw off, Rangel."
He reaches for me sympathetically, but I scoot backwards against my headboard.
"Just leave," I murmur.
Rangel lingers on my bed for awhile as I stare at him sternly. until he finally lets out a long sigh and stands.
"Alright, but never say I didn't try to apologize," he says.
Watching him leave with heavy footsteps, he closes my door after him, mumbling voices on the other side.
Having to strain my ears to listen in...
"Dude, she's pissed off," Rangel informs.
"No, I expected her to be skipping through a flowery meadow, you dumbass," Jackle smarts off.
"I'm always having to pick up after your messes, how about you fix yourself this time, Jack," Rangel offers.
Jackle laughs, a deep rumble.
"We're talking about Estelle here, bro."
"So?"
"So, she'll get over it like she always does. Trust me, girls are weird," Jackle explains.
"You could say that again," Rangel chuckles.
"Now, come on, we're missing out on the game," Jackle tells him, their footsteps becoming distant.
Sighing, I pull Leon's journal from my pillows, lifting the silk bookmark that marked where I was...
The main consequence of letting myself teleport, read minds, feel other's literal pain, and much other unknown abilities was me having to get kicked from my lovely home.
My instincts were to hide away my inner freak, my parents becoming suspicious at my dull behavior soon enough...
They threatened me, yelled and scolded more often as I mentally would move objects around the house, the both of them disappointed in their son.
The sight of me basically made them sick with sadness or anger.
"Could you at least 'try' to be a normal werewolf?" My mother would ask.
Brushing my black hair over my bright lime-green eye, my mother would nod in praise, punishing me whenever I dared to embrace myself being psychic.
Part of me was distraught by the way my parents wouldn't accept me the way I was.
The way they crammed the thought into their heads that I was perfectly normal and not a hybrid.
A hybrid...
Psychic warlock while being half werewolf.
Wonderful combination.. Not.
Who'd want to be forced into feeling other's pain with just a simple touch? Or having to read their minds when mostly they are rotten..?
Because think about it, everything in your head isn't said aloud for a reason...
-Leon
Slamming the journal shut, I panic inside knowing how he could of read my mind every time we talked even though he said he couldn't... Tricking me to not be afraid to think my true thoughts around him.
Standing from my bed, I clean up and brush my hair, seeing the bruises along my temple now fading slowly.
Hesitantly emerging out of my room, I hear the guy's voices booming over the football game flashing on the TV.
Quietly walking down the dark staircase, I notice Neil was over, his nerdy self also screaming along.
I take it the team they wanted to win was losing poorly...
Striding to the kitchen, none of them noticing me as they were too engrossed, I suddenly am gazing upon Leon to my utter shock.
He sets the snacks of salsa and chips on the counter when seeing me, smiling slightly.
"Rangel invited you?" I whisper.
"Actually, Neil just dragged me along," he replies softly, shrugging. "He's been worried for me. Says I'm acting strange lately."
"So they made you the waiter?" I question quietly. "How's waiting on them going to help you?"
"Don't you go worrying about me too," he says, grabbing both my hands and staring into my eyes.
"Of course I will. There's a crazy wolf pack after you and nowhere is safe for you," I tell him, squeezing his hands before hugging him tight.
"Thanks for making me feel better, Es," he mumbles sarcastically-
"Hurry up with the food, Loren!" I hear one of the guys holler. "What's the hold up?"
"Can't even get your name right either?" I question, rolling my eyes.
Leon shrugs as if it weren't a big deal, giving me a quick kiss to my cheek then the edge of my mouth, causing me to press a solid kiss to his lips after all his teasing, not able to control myself.
Grabbing the platter of chips and salsa, Leon fumbles with it, the food flying onto the both of us as it slipped from his grasp...
The platter falling to the ground shatters all over my feet, forcing me to bite my lip to not yell out.
"What the hell is going on in there?" I hear Rangel's voice before he comes striding into sight.
"Dang, I'm so clumsy! Sorry Leon!" I attempt an excuse to save Leon from getting more hatred from Rangel.
"Like I believe that, Estelle?" His stern tone got me uncomfortable as he walked over to me, avoiding the mess and grabbing my shoulders.
"I'd release me if I were you-"
"Or what? You'll bite me again?" Rangel chuckles. "Clean this mess up."
"Clean this mess up my ass. Treat me like your Luna and maybe I would do more for you," I reply with spite. "Instead of treating me like some damn slave of yours."
"Ohhh, shots fired!" I hear Luster holler in laughter, the rest of the guys busting a gut as well.
Grumbling, Rangel continues with a roll of his eyes,"What's the point of treating you like my Luna when you're locking lips with lover boy over here?" Rangel points out. "You're lucky I'm in self-control tonight and don't rip his heart right out this second."
"Or you know that you won't get a third chance from the Alpha for starting another fight with him. Rangel, just leave. I've got this under control, alright?" I question, wanting him out of my sight.
"Just leave for what? To have you all over him again? No, you're coming with me," he seethes, giving Leon a dirty knowing look.
"Actually, I was just going. I'll see you two around," Leon says, taking Rangel's look as an expression to leave.
"No, don't go because I'm ruining everything," I tell him, Rangel's arm tightly around my waist possessively. "Stay and watch the game."
Leon shrugs.
"If you insist."
Smiling at him to express I was okay, I let Rangel drag me from the kitchen and towards the stairs.
"I swear if he hurts you, I'm gonna kick his ass,"... A low voice rings in my head, sounding a lot like... Leon?
He can talk telepathically too?
Turning back to look at him, I see him wink and take a seat next to Neil on the couch.
"Estelle, how many times do I need to say that you can't be with him for you to actually get that through your thick skull?" Rangel furiously growls as we stand at the top of the staircase.
"I'm my own person and I can't help who I fall for," I mumble in guilt. "I'm sorry."
"I don't want your pity," he replies spitefully.
"I know..." I trail off, not having a comeback this time.
Rangel cups the sides of my face, searching my eyes, sensing my pain.
"Then end things with Leon. I don't know what you two have done or said to each other. I have no idea if you two are even a 'secret thing', but I'm-"
"Stop worrying. Obviously I'm tied to you rather if I like it or not," I point out, interrupting his sentence.
"Can't you just realize you're committing a illegal move to the committee's Ceremony? I could turn you in-" Rangel starts.
"But you wouldn't," I breath, leaning closer.
"Don't try me, Edwards."
With that being said, Rangel steps back while eyeing me.
"Can you just stay in your room until everybody leaves?" He asks after a moment of awkward silence.
"Sure," I growl, striding to my room and closing the door without looking back at him.
I stand inside of my bedroom until I hear his thump on the staircase, taking my chance to leave my room then.
Entering Rangel's bedroom, I close the door and search through his things, knowing he wasn't all "innocent" like he claims he always is.
Rangel acts like I'm the only problem in this forced relationship when he's all clean himself?
Huffing as I messed through paperwork and many books about mechanics and engineering, I continue to open up drawers.
Seeing pictures scattered under notebooks, I pick them up and see him with his parents and siblings, him looking young and happy at the beach or on his birthdays with cake in his light hair and covering his tiny button nose.
Others were of him when he got older in his early teen years of fourteen and fifteen, a girl wrapped up in his arms...
Tons of pictures of this girl and him, even as they both grew older.
Wait, was that picture recent?
Squinting my eyes to get a better view, I notice a date of last month, the girl unfamiliar and obviously werewolf in this Committee somewhere.
Reading the caption by the date that states she was indeed a "best friend" I sigh in defeat, slamming the drawer shut.
Rummaging through his nightstand then, almost feeling guilty that I was intruding in on his private life-
Gasping as I gaze upon his bottom drawer full to the top of bras, I gag just as my ears perk at the sound of footsteps.
"What do you think you're doing?" His familiar deep voice questions, his footsteps coming closer.
"I-I-I was looking for my bra," I lie while still trying not to cringe. "My favorite has been missing."
My favorite has been missing...What the hell am I even saying?
Rangel strides closer to me, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Estelle, I've got no bra of your's. Trust me, if you liked me better, then maybe it would have a better chance of being in there," he smirks.
"This is no time for you dirty jokes!" I yell.
"Really? How about it's time for you to quit lying constantly," he fires back.
"Look at yourself, Stevens!" I holler. "You're still bedding girls and hiding it from me. I'm not enough for you?"
"Can you look at my side of the story for once?" Rangel asks.
"I have already. You're a complete pig that needs full attention no matter from what girl you can manage to pick up," I reply.
That's when he growls, striding closer to me and yanking me close, forcing me to tilt my head up to look at him which he knew I hated.
"You always have to keep it going, don't you?" Rangel breaths. "How about you tell me the truth and I'll let you go?"
"Fine.... I was looking through your stuff because I nearly know anything about you," I sigh. "I want to know the real you."
"Real me? Estelle, I'm not hiding anything," he tells me, playing with a strand of my hair as he always does.
"Who's Silvia then?" I ask.
"A friend that I lost touch with. I'd rather not talk about it," he says, sounding hurt which was different for iron-chested Rangel.
"But the date was marked last month?" I continue.
Rangel sighs, pulling me over to his bed so we both could sit down.
"Silvia was a neighbor when I was growing up. I'd watch her through my windows or while on my lawnmower-"
"Creepy," I interject.
Rangel rolls his eyes and continues,"I've never had the guts to say anything to her until I was thirteen. Silvia was a good friend to lean on and trust. She was an orphan with nice adoptive parents that treated her well. Her and I had a lot in common with knowing the pain of losing parents-"
"You lost your parents?" I ask, completely perplexed.
"That doesn't matter-"
"Doesn't matter?"
"You're losing the point, Estelle," Rangel huffs. "Silvia was nothing more than a good friend."
I give him a flat look.
"Fine, I'll take you to meet her tomorrow," Rangel sighs, standing. "You have to be so stubborn all the time?"
"Only when I see your nightstand full of bras," I answer him.
"I was planning on burning those."
"Like that makes it all better?" I say.
Rangel shrugs.
"For me it does. The drawer is getting too full."
"Which means you're planning on filling it up again?" I disgustingly question.
"What can I say? Like I'm going to turn down any girl that's into me?" He replies.
"You're unbelievable," I sigh. "And you're telling me I'm going against the Ceremony's rules."
Rangel slams the door at my words, annoyed and sick of me as he always is... I guess that's why he has one night stands.
Sighing once again, I turn into Rangel's pillows, too lazy to move to my own bed.
Smelling Rangel's scent all over, it basically drives me insanely irritated as if he were still here bickering-
Hearing the bedroom door opening, I jump up in surprise to see scrawny Neil.
"Hey, I heard yelling. You okay?" He wonders.
Being confused at Neil's sudden curiousness about how I was doing, I watch him come closer to sit next to me.
"Just tired," I reply, not feeling like talking when I nearly understood the relationship between Rangel and me anymore...
"You always look stressed when you're tired or..?" Neil drags out his question.
I chuckle slightly, smiling at him.
"Well, if it makes you feel any better, Leon has been talking to me about how he's going to talk to Rangel," Neil tells me.
"Talk to Rangel?" I question.
"Yeah, like get to be on his good side somehow. He's got this whole plan figured out and everything," Neil explains. "I'd be happy if I were you."
"When?" I ask.
"Like after the game's over," Neil answers.
"No..." I groan, standing.
"No what?" he asks, touching my shoulder lightly.
"We've got to stop him!" I loudly say.
"Why, I'd say it's a good idea. Let them talk it out," Neil says to me.
"You don't get it," I reply. "Rangel won't ever loosen up to Leon. He bitterly hates him!"
"You don't know that. After all, Leon is here watching a game with Rangel," he points out. "That has to mean something."
"Yeah, that he doesn't mean he doesn't want to bloody fight him again for the hundredth time," I remark. "We've got to stop this before it leads to the both of them getting kicked out of camp!"
"Whoa, whoa there," Neil says. "We've?"
"Neil, you're going to have to do something you'll probably hate me for," I tell him.
"Wait, I never singed up for this!" he yells, going for the door.
Catching his arm, I pout.
"Please, I need you to do this for me."
"Depends on what it is."
"Once the last quarter of the game ends, I need you to-" I start.
"I don't want to hear it!" Neil exclaims, covering his ears like a child.
Rolling my eyes, I walk over to the railing to see two minutes left on the clock, the guys sitting on the edge of their seats.
Gritting my teeth to see Leon stand up pacing, probably going through his lines, my heart races.
Looking back to see Neil still covering his ears, back turned away from me, I sigh in defeat.
Having to think quick with the clock almost over, I suck in a breath and purposely slip on the staircase, shielding my head as I tumbled down.
Screaming in pain, the guys jump from their seats, Neil running down the staircase to catch me.
"What the hell man?" Rangel booms up the staircase at Neil who was holding me upright, the burns from the carpet stinging.
"I swear I have no idea how this happened. All I know is that I was talking to her and then... Boom!" Neil nervously speaks, releasing me to only feel dizzy enough to have to hold onto the banister.
Rangel was in fumes, pounding up the stairs and grabbing Neil's shirt front harshly.
"I suggest you speak truthfully here, little boy," Rangel grits out, eyes brightening.
"I-I am speaking truthfully," Neil stutters nervously. "Why do you think I helped her if I intended on hurting her?"
"Listen here, you pathetic rat!" Rangel furiously speaks. "How about some truth before you become one with the carpet tacks!"
I visibly see Neil gulp.
"I told you, I'm telling the truth!"
Rangel growls, balling his fists in anger.
"Even ask your Luna!" Neil adds, grasping onto his very own lifeline...
"I've seen enough!" Rangel bellows, punching him down.
Neil shrieks as Rangel picks him up and hangs him over the banister by his shoulders.
"Want to speak truthfully now?" Rangel daringly questions.
"Stop!" I yell just as Neil was about to form words.
Rangel looks over to me, cocking his head.
"You want me to stop when this guy almost just killed you?"
Watching as he shakes Neil's shoulders, I gasp in terror.
"Pull him up, Rangel!" I order. "It wasn't his fault!"
Rangel squints his eyes at me in question for a moment, yanking Neil up and tossing him to the floor carelessly.
Goodness, this wasn't what I wanted for a distraction...
"You're covering for him now? I swear Estelle, you want to keep getting bullied and never do anything about it? You want to hold it all in forever?" Rangel says, his foot to Neil's neck.
"Maybe you should start believing that not everybody is out to get me," I back fire. "I just didn't feel like talking to him so I went running for the stairs but I happened to trip instead."
"I have no idea when you're telling me the truth anymore..." Rangel grumbles, yanking Neil to his unsteady feet.
"Dare hurt her again, you should plan to bring shovels along for me so I can dig your grave," Rangel growls in Neil's ear, shoving him away once his sentence was spoken.
I should apologize later.
"Whatever man," Neil replies, striding down the staircase and out the door without looking at anyone as he passed by, his gaze on his sneakers.
"You've got some explaining to do later," Rangel tells me. "Better be honest or I might just get ugly. I'm sick of you're attitude. It stops now."
"I've got no explaining to do!" I holler. "How about you explain why it's suddenly necessary to embarrass and almost kill Neil."
"You're just flat out too polite and nice for you're own good. You know what happens to people like you?" He breathes.
I raise an eyebrow.
"They get stepped on and used..." Rangel replies. "Kill or be killed, Es."
Patting my back, Rangel goes down the staircase, throwing his arms up.
"We won, boys!" He yells in cheer, all of the guys quickly loosening up and cheering as well.
Though all of them were chest-pumping and giving each other knuckles as Leon was standing emotionless alone.
Eventually he goes for the front door, nobody says anything to him, making me feel bad for him.
Striding to my bedroom, I crawl under my sheets, reading the next date to Leon's journal to eliminate the anxious thoughts of meeting Rangel's so called "best friend" tomorrow...