What has just transpired? That is probably the most stressful lunch I have ever been on. Harry however seems to take all of it lightly because he never lost his cool and just kept on being himself, with a tad of cockiness, which probably pissed Josh even more.
I felt a bit sad that Harry had to leave after lunch. He had to meet someone and promises to be back later. He promised a "dinner date", that, being a home cooked meal in his place. We agreed to do that instead, knowing we may get papped and we both don't want any complications. We are not anything so any unnecessary attention is therefore not welcome.
As soon as Harry left I went to find Josh. Despite his annoying behavior earlier, I am still excited to give the twinning phone I bought that matches mine.
"Hey you," I say as I knock on his partially opened bedroom door. The guestroom across mine is his designated place everytime he visits. I see him lying on the bed with his back by the head board. He's flipping channels.
"So did Hairy leave?" He smirks.
"Hairy?" I asked with one brow raised. "What are you, five?" We both snicker.
"Well he is hairy. Just saying." His eyes crinkles and as he is amused by his own corny joke.
"I have a surprise for you!" I wiggle my brows. Still standing by the door.
"Wait, if that is a prank, please spare me. I am already pissed enough seeing Hairy all over you." He shakes his head and throws the remote on the bed for dramatic purposes perhaps.
"Oh stop being a jerk Joshua! Give me a sec," and I run out of the room and came back with a giftwrapped box. I walk towards the bed to hand him the gift. I prop myself beside him, "mind you, that is my birthday and Christmas gift combined for the next 30 years!"
He carefully tears the wrapper and his eyes light up as he sees the familiar white box. "Alex! This is too much! I don't know what to say?"
"Thank you would be nice." I nudge him.
"Of course! Thanks!" He envelopes me in a tight embrace. "I always wanted one but my plan is yet to expire.I wonder why you surprised me with this, knowing how thrifty you are. You must have been possessed or something!"
Yeah, I thought. Harry! Images of our hotel encounter flashes back. Possessed is accurate as fuck.
"Thanks again and sorry for making you feel bad by being a jerk to Hair...Harry. I only have your well being in mind." He sighs.
"Do you really like him, Alex," He asks and turns his head towards me.
My brows furrow as I stare on the patterns of bed sheet. "Uhm yeah, obviously. Why do you ask?"
"He is a celebrity, you know how their world works." He sighs.
I interrupt him because I am pretty sure what he is going to say next. "You don't want me to get hurt right? Don't worry about me Josh, I can take care if myself. As cliche as it may sound, I'm a fuckin grown up, I know what I'm getting into."
He chuckles as he sits up. "I'm gonna kill him if he breaks your heart." And like the cave man that he is, he cracks his knuckles for effect.
"Yeah me too," Allen pipes in. "Tell Harry he has to deal with both of us."
"Have you been eavesdropping Allen!" I stand up and cross my arms. "You two should leave Hairy alone." I snort. "Seriously, I can take care of myself." I think! I thought to myself.
Allen laughs even more. "Yeah like how you did with Earl?"
"Or with Dwight!" Josh joins the laughter. Oh these two boys are in a tag team.
"Shut up you two! I've learned my lessons." I throw them dagger looks. Or you Josh! I want to blurt out. You broke my heart just in case you have forgotten. I shake these thoughts away. I don't want to deal with this now. Harry. Focus on Harry.
Allen puts his arms around me and messes my hair. "Don't be mad, Lexie. You know we mean well. Harry is a famous celebrity. He lives in a jaded world where everything is at his beck and call. Josh and I are just concerned that you will just be one of his conquests. He dates fellow celebrities! When I threw the party recently, he was with a blonde model and they were all over each other!"
I pout in disgust. Not at Josh and Allen but at the mention of that model. Wait, why am I even jealous? "Ok, I get it. i am an inexperienced naive girl who is a mismatch to a savvy womanizer like Harry. Is that the synopsis of our story?" My tone a tad higher.
"Yep," pipes in Josh. "That pretty much sums it up." I roll my eyes in annoyance and I let out a loud groan.
"We are just teasing you Lexie," Allen interrups. "Yes we are concerned, but this is really your choice. But if Hairy chooses to break your heart..."
"You will break his face," I replied in a monotone voice. I cross my arms and raise one brow.
"And shave his head!" Josh adds laughing. Allen nods in agreement as I storm out of the room, banging the door for effect. I'm not really mad. I just enjoy making these boys think I'm mad. Take that idiots! Ha!
I jump on my bed and I lay there staring at the ceiling. I wish for a better life, I whisper to myself as I close my eyes. This brief encounter with Harry made me reevaluate my life. I realized I need to live more and have more encounters like that, not really sexual like that, but more unplanned uncalculated moments like that. Take fuckin risks and live for the moment, as Allen would always say, and do.
My thoughts are interrupted when I feel the bed dip on one side. "Alex," it's Josh. I turned sideways away from him hoping he'd leave. "Are you mad? Because you know you can't stay mad at me." True. "Alex, please." Whining.
"What do you want?" I turn around to face him. He is lying sideways propped up by his elbow. I laid down staring at the ceiling avoiding his gaze.
"I'm sorry for messing up with Harry. I just don't want you to be hurt."
"Yeah," I sighed. "Once is enough" I muttered.
"What did you say?" Josh seemed to have missed it.
"Nothing! I get it Josh. You don't have to explain. You can now leave." I roll my eyes and turned my back against him.
"Alex, I know I have no right to sound so protective of you, not when I know I hurt you before, like big time."
Wait. What is he saying? This is the first time we are talking about this. Why now. We've swept it under the rug for so long.
He scoots in closer his arms plays with the hem of my sleeves. "I wanted to say sorry for the longest time. I didn't know what to do then. I was selfish."
Tears trickle down my cheeks. I'm fighting it not wanting this to be a sob fest. My heart though feels like it's being stabbed. Emotions hit me like it happened yesterday.
"I... I was in love with Chelsea and I really didn't know that it was hurting you."
Chelsea from sophomore year in college whom I call Chewbacca because she had an irritating voice.
"I noticed then that you drifted away but I was too deep into her to even consider that."
"Yeah, too deep into her big boobs!" I snorted.
"Wait what?" He chuckles. "Anyway, I never knew how bad I hurt you. That is until I saw Allen months after we haven't talked. He said you lost a lot of weight and that you have been diagnosed with an eating disorder. He mentioned you got heartbroken by some dude that he didn't know. I knew then it was me because why would you keep it from being known to Allen."
"Wait," I said as I stood up to sit on the bed He sits beside me. "You knew I had an eating disorder?"
"Yeah, I did. Which is why I made an effort to rekindle our friendship. I don't want you to die you know. And why do you think I would always make the effort to cook for you," he jokes, at a time like this. Which earned a smirk from me.
"Look..." I wanted to end this conversation. I think we are ok where we are now and digging up the past will only mess our friendship.
"No, let me finish." He touches my lips with his finger. "I'm sorry Alex. I'm sorry I made you feel that way before. I'm sorry that I brushed you off and I blamed you for falling for me. I was caught unaware of the things you said, when you admitted you liked me like more than a friend. I got confused, I didn't know how to handle that and I, well I rejected you. I'm sorry i messed you up. It's just that..." He sighs and stares at the ceiling. "I never knew I..."
My phone rings and Harry's name flashes on the screen. Josh frowns and stands up to leave.