More Than This

All That Matters

❤️

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Are all men that dumb? I have to say Harry is on top of that heap right now. Why am I so riled up? I know my fucked up hormones are not helping me think properly right now. Frustrating! Breathe, Alex! This is your life and future. Remember, worse case scenario, whatever Harry does or say, life will move on.

Harry enters the room "Alex, please hear me out first." He pleads.

He better not be near me. I might just hit him. That's how upset  I am right now. "If you're just going to say that you don't know what to do or say, don't waste my time and leave now." I point at the door for emphasis.

Harry gives out a loud sigh. "Fuck! Alex! What do you want from me?" His voice a tad higher.

Ah. I'm going to fight fire with fire. "What do I want from you?" I stand up and walk towards him. "Nothing!" I spit the words as I push his torso causing him to be off balance and step backwards.

He does nothing back, ignoring the fact that I pushed him. He moves forward, but keeps distance. "What? What do you mean nothing?" He scoffs.

"Well If you think I'd ask you to marry me, then you're mistaken. Or if you think I will be asking money from you, then no." I say to him straight. I mean every word I said. Because all I really want from him is that he would want these babies, too. But it seems that is too much to ask from him.

Harry smirks. "Look, you really don't have to tell me that you don't need anything from me.." He scoffs. "Obviously, I know you can take care of yourself. You have been that way ever since we met! You refuse to have doors opened for you. You don't ask for anything. You even practically discourage me from giving you anything!" He rants.

He steps even closer, like an inch of space, probably testing me if I will shun him. Seeing no resistance from me, he envelopes me in his arms. "But I love all of that about you. I really would have wanted it to be otherwise, but why fight it? That makes you, you." He tones down his voice.

Harry takes both my hands and puts it on his shoulders. He grabs my waist closer to him, his forehead touches mine. "I love you, Alex. Please, at least give me a chance to be part of this. I am going to be the Dad after all." He whispers to me.

"Yeah," I sigh. My anger subsiding. Even I am surprised by how much my feelings are jumping from one peak to another. Must come with the territory of being pregnant. Good thing Harry is just as patient with me.

Harry leads me to the couch where we sit side by side. He puts his arm around me and his other hand holds my own. He plants feather kisses while we sit in silence.

"Who would have thought that I'm going to be a Dad soon?" Harry breaks the silence says laughing. "I called Mum and I told her about it. She's still in shock probably. But she said she was happy. She's already thinking about baby names." Harry chuckles. She is probably in shock, given the circumstnaces, but at least I know his Mom's excited and I could tell Harry's beginning to.

While it makes me happy that Harry's on board with me, his career keeps on popping in my mind. Like I feel gulity of what's happening. "Harry, I think we need to be lowkey about this. I know it would negatively impact your career." I sigh deeply, preparing for what I have to say next. "I, uh, kind of decided that I will be moving away from LA." I say the words that I have been rehearsing in my head for a million times already. It sounds just right and also wrong at the same time. The irony of our situation.

"Wait." Harry shifts to face me. He looks surprised by what I said. "Where are you going?" He says with confusion written on his face.

"Away." I chuckle.