"Devi... This incarnation will throw you into tumultuous waters. Separation will be your companion, in this life as well. And you know.... You can't skip it. You will have to make many sacrifices in return of other's happiness only..."- A voice enveloped Urmila from surreal haze, which was repeating the same sentences again and again. A sense of blurry recognition bloomed in her mind, as the voice was close to her soul and reminiscented of Lakshman. She could only see a divine aura and an invisible figure behind it.
She felt the eco of some past memories, which she had never lived in her 20 years of life. Who was it ? She strained to see the speaker's face, but only his piercing golden brown eyes were visible through the fog.
"You have to be the even in every odd... That's the purpose of this life...." - The sentence echoed again and again in her senses in the same familiar voice. As she became more and more restless, the fog thickened around her and the voice faded slowly by dragging her back to her own presence....
Urmila opened her eyes in sudden shock, as if lightnings passed through her spine. Her heart rate was heavy and forehead was sweaty as she realised that by that it was a soft haunting dream.
Her surroundings were silent, except the cold wind coming through her window. She looked out, the sun was was almost set by painting the western sky crimson red. The sudden realisation of reality struck her heart again. She remembered that her Saumitra has left for fourteen years of exile with Ram and Sita. And she lost consciousness after him vanishing from her sight... Sumitra and her maids cared her, and brought her back to Moti Bhavan. After many trials, she couldn't came back to sense. So as per the physician's suggestion, they left her in her room to rest her body and mind... And now, she was finally back to sense properly.
Her trembling feets took her towards the balcony... Entire palace had drowned in an ocean of silence. The vibrant decoration was still in the campus, corridors, halls and gates. But the soul had snatched away, all were appearing just gray and pale with unbearable weight of sorrow. Every corner was whispering tales of longing and loss. The absence of Ram, accompanied by Lakshmana and Sita, left a void that seemed insurmountable.
The air hung heavy with the collective grief of its inhabitants. Urmila's heart was heavy with the burden of separation. Even the breeze dared not stir too strongly around her, as if it was fearful of disrupting the somber ambiance that had settled over her like a heavy veil of despair. Every breath was a reminder of her husband's absence. Each moment without him felt like an eternity and her soul was yearning for his comforting presence. Yet, despite the overwhelming grief that threatened to consume her, she remained steadfast, holding back her tears as she remembered the promise she had made to her beloved. Though her eyes remained dry, her heart wept silently... crazily, carrying the weight of her unspoken longing and the burden of her unwavering commitment to honor her vow.
Her courage gave up to see the marks of everyone's dead excitement on the flowers and colourful fabrics hanging across the palace... And she returned back to her room.
Infront of the gigantic mirror, she stood with zero expression on face. As Urmila gazed into the glass, her reflection seemed to taunt her. The heavy jewels adorning her form started mocking her. The image before her questioned the purpose of her elaborated shringar, when the one she adorned herself for had embarked on a hermit's journey. Each glittering bauble felt like a cruel reminder of her Saumitra's absence. With trembling hands, she agressively washed her face again and again. Then stripped herself of the trappings of royalty, that now felt hollow and meaningless. With each piece of clothing, she shed the constraints of her former life, embracing a new identity forged in love and sacrifice.
As she removed each piece of jewelry, a sense of liberation washed over her, accompanied by a bittersweet realization of the superficiality of her former desires. In their place, she wore a simple white hermit woman's attire, a symbolic gesture of solidarity with her beloved as he embarked on his exile. In that moment, Urmila found strength in simplicity and her heart was beating with melody of the quiet resolve of her soulmate's chosen path.
After donning the hermit attire, Urmila gazed at her reflection again. The simplicity of her attire resonated deeply with her soul. Then she put a thick line of vermilion on her forehead, which bears her husband's name. It became her most precious adornment, symbolizing her unwavering devotion for Lakshman.
She remembered Ram's words, that reminded her of her crucial role in caring for their fractured family. Kaikeyi's deceit had left wounds that ran deep and got compounded by the absence of Ram, Sita, and Lakshman. With a heavy heart, Urmila embraced her duty with newfound determination, vowing to be the pillar of strength for her family in their darkest hour. Because that's her duty... That's her raj dharma
With that sense of duty, Urmila walked straight towards the kings chamber. Every eye, that fell upon her in path, remained shocked and unblinkable. Because the shringar loving princess Urmila had given up on all that was part of her shringar.
In the king's chamber, Dashrath was laying semiconscious on the bed. Sumitra and Kaushalya were caressing his hands on either sides. The last ten hours had made him look torn and dull, as if he aged ten years more in just one day. Neither his eyes were ready to rest, which was just trailing across that huge royal room... as if he will capture the glimpse of his Ram at any corner. Nor his lips were staying calm, which were busy in continuous inaudible babblings. The queens were sitting beside him like statues since morning, so their maids.
As Urmila entered the chamber, every eye went big by her dress up. Nobody had to ask 'why' but painful gasps left every mouth. On the other hand, Urmila herself remained broke after seeing such condition of her respected father in law. A sharp pain clasped her throat but her eyes didn't dare to be damp.
"Oh Urmila... My daughter...." -Dashrath started crying again loudly. - "Why my soul didn't left this body before seeing you like this?"
Urmila went near him.- "Pitashree, for the sake of Narayan... Please don't say such things. I'm here for you, I'll take care of you. And fourteen years are going to pass like a dry grass on stream of water. Ram bhaiya will return soon with Sita didi and Saumitra. Please don't be broken like this." -Urmila pleaded.
Kaushlya broke into tears once again in Urmila's arms, as she sat beside her.
Dashrath masked a smile on his plae wrinkled face. - "What should I do daughter? What should I say ? I.... Maharaj Dashrath... King of the Wealthiest Kingdom Ayodhya.... Is running out of words inbetween his constant flow of thoughts. I don't understand daughter, should I say thank you for not leaving me in this situation... Or should I apologise for what hardship and sufferings I brought you ? Should I say thank you for sharing the weight of my sins on your innocent heart ? Or should I apologise for making you sacrifice your every happiness for absolute no reason ?"
Another tear drop rolled out from the shrunken eyes of Dashrath.
"No pitashree..."- Urmila wipped his tears. -"Your 'thank you' will never let me face myself... and your 'sorry' will drag me to hell... All I'm doing is my duty, Pitashree. In the absence of your sons, you are my responsibility. And I'm just trying my best to fulfill it. I'll nourish you and you will be better in some days... Then we will wait together for Ram bhaiya, Sita didi and Saumitra's arrival.."
Urmila smiled at the king, by hiding the heart ache.
Dashrath's smiled back - "Your words are reminded me of my maa... Late Maharani Indumati... She used to give me hope like this, When I was young..... When I was young.... When I was young...."
He repeated the last sentence again and again while losing himself in some past memories.
"Maharaj... Please don't go back to that past. Everything will be fine with time. Trust me..."- Sumitra pleaded.
Dashrath murmured while his gaze was fixed on celing - "I won't have to Sumitra... Because it's already standing infront of me... It's there..."
He again started whispering inaudible stuffs in a zoned out condition.
"What happened Pitashree...? Do you need something?" - Urmila concerned.
Dashrath replied with same manner- "He's here.... He is here to take me. I want Ram... I want my Ram... My sita... My Lakshman....."
Urmila was confused, but the queens were not.
"Nobody is here pitashree... Please calm down. Provide some rest to yourself..."- Urmila Consoled but the queens started tearing again.
An undescribable terror blazed in Dashrath's eyes. His forehead was all sweaty and body temperature was way more than average. In shaking voice, he muttered again- "He is here Urmila.... He is standing right there..... His gaze is burning me upto soul..... His tears... His breath... His blood....... His blood is all over me... All over my hand.... I can't get rid of them"
Suddenly he started rubbing his hands on the banket above his body and cried again.
Sumitra looked away with high sobbings because her eyes were unable to see her husband like this. Kaushlya was just sitting like a statue, tired of speaking, crying, screaming and every other thing.
Urmila held Dashrath's hand tightly inorder to stop him from being this mentally exhausted. - "Stop doing this, pitashree... Who are you talking about, nobody is here. There's nothing in your hand. Please listen to me."
"No Urmila... With each breath, he is coming closer to me, he won't return without taking me" - Dashrath pointed at a corner.
Urmila cluelessly looked in the direction, but there was absolute nobody. - "Who are you talking about Pitashree..."
Dashrath gulped air, as if that name was so heavy for his tongue. But still with trembling throat he said- "Sh... Shhrr....Shravan.... Shravan Kumar"
This one name hit the queen like a strong wave of lightning. Both of them simultaneously held their husband's hand again.
"Forget this name Maharaj... Please.... It's past and it's buried."-Kaushalya requested in windshield voice.
"No maharani. It's not buried.... It was never buried. It has always been walking beside me, waiting to take me away... And he is going to do it today." - Dashrath trembled in terror.
Sumitra added- "No-one is taking you away.... Maharaj please. Calm down. Rest a little."
Dashrath cried- "He will take me away, Sumitra. Shravan.... The curse.... "
The king couldn't complete his sentence. Urmila was confused, but after seeing the queens she had understood that it's must be some dark past of his father in law, which is haunting him in this dreadful situation.
"I can't go before seeing my Ram... Ram.... My Ram..."-Dashrath kept chanting Ram's name only. And his queens tries to console him.
A messenger came and silently stood near the door of the kings chamber but didn't enter in. Urmila went near him.
- "Rajvadhu... I have message from Prime minister Sumant."
The messenger said in a slower tone, without disturbing the king and queens.
Urmila gestured him to convey.
"Rajkumar Ram, Rajkumar Lakshman and Rajvadhu Sita have crossed the border of Ayodhya and tonight they are staying at the bank of Tamasa river. Almost entire Ayodhya have followed them up to there. After countless requests of the Princes, none of them returned back. All were with them and have decided to follow Rajkumar Ram for fourteen years. So Arya Sumant couldn't return as well." -The messanger gave the message by looking down.
"What.... But that's risky. They can't follow the princes till 14 years, by leaving their own life behind." - Urmila was tensed.
Messenger- "They didn't listen to anyone. Not even Rajkumar Ram. So they are going to spend tonight with them. And tomorrow before dawn, the princes will leave with Rajvadhu Sita, without letting anybody know their location..."
"That would be good. I know Ram bhaiya won't risk these many people's lives at any cost..." - Urmila was relieved and was about to go back to Dashrath, who was still seeing illusions of either Shravan or Ram in every corner of his room.
"But Rajvadhu..."- The messenger stopped Urmila again.
-"I have another message for you... From Rajkumar Ram"
Urmila- "what is it?"
The messenger's tone became extra slow. - "He said that, While being drowned in the sorrow of their exile, nobody should forget the kingdom. People will come and go. But the glory of Ayodhya should stay unbreakable. Since you are in charge of all responsibilities, Rajkumar Ram want you to start the preparation of Rajkumar Bharat's coronation...."
Urmila nodded silently.
The messenger continued- "He said it has two reasons. One... Maharaj's health is not in a good condition so he's unable to manage the kingdom, and he himself is in the forest. So the throne should not stay king less.
Second... He has assured Rani Kaikeyi that both of his boons will be fulfilled. Since he had executed the second so the first one needs to be done as soon as possible. So he's transferring this responsibility to you. Now you have to carry Rajkumar Bharat upto the throne of Ayodhya."
The messenger's voice diminished on the last sentence, as if he had never imagined in his life that oneday he waill say such things.
Urmila immediately agreed. With the flame of respect raising for Ram, she silently bowed to his sense of duty towards all. - "I'll follow his order... Soon the letter to Kaikeya will be sent for Rajkumar Bharat.
Nobody realised how the entire night passed and morning arrived while sitting around the king. Sumant returned after Ram Sita and Lakshman leaving for their journey before the sunrise. And as per Ram's wish Sumant sent letter to Kaikeya, without mentioning any proper reason.
None of the member of royal family had taken a sip of water since Ram, Sita and Lakshman leaving palace. Dashrath's condition had become more and more worse overnight, as he just chanted Ram's name all night by visualising him everywhere. Sometimes as a kid, playing around him and sometimes as a king, ruling gracefully over Ayodhya.
"Ram... Don't leave me Ram... Dont go Sita.... Lakshman... Please stop Lakshman..." -Dashrath started screaming and crying again, as a result Urmila went back near her father in law.
Kaushalya and Sumitra rushed to held his hands for soothing his trembling form. "Swami, Ram is not with us. He's in the forest,"- Kaushalya uttered as her voice laced with concern and grief.
"But I see him everywhere, Kaushalya. He's slipping away from me,"- Dashrath lamented, tears were streaming down his cheeks.
Sumitra held Dashrath's hand tightly, by offering her own solace. -"Swami, it's just your mind playing tricks on you. Ram is not here but he is safe and sound... He will return very soon to you."
"I don't have much time, Sumitra. The curse is moving towards me like a hungry monster. It's going to consume me.... I need to see my Ram... Ram.... Come back...." -Dashrath kept shouting while trying to get up from his bed and rush towards the door, where he was imagining Ram. He had became too restless that the queens couldn't even control him anymore. So the physician had to made him drink some medicine, as a result his weakened body fell back on the bed to rest. But still his eyes were not shut... The hope of seeing Ram was failing the effects of all medicines. The physicians were astonished... But the truth were not far from them. Because they knew that only few hours have left with the king.
It was impossible for them to say this to the royal family. So as a symbolic gesture, the took off their turban by looking down. And every heart skipped a beat by knowing the truth.
Kaushlya was statued again, but Dashrath passed a dull grin in that half conscious state. - "Don't be surprised Kaushalya... You knew it would come someday. The curse was meant to happen someday."
Kaushlya was silent... As if she has never spoken a word in her life. Sumitra cried like a kid. - "Don't say that Swami... We have hopes... Since when Ram has left, you are imagining him everywhere and repeating these same lines again and again. So why don't you keep the hope to see your son again..."
"No hope left Sumitra. You knew this curse will engulf me someday... And today is that day." - Dashrath smiled.
The palace started sobbing beside the king and this news flew to Megha Bhavan immediately.
Dashrath looked at Urmila, she had no idea what to do. Neither she could stop what was happening, nor cry for not being able to stop what was happening.
"Urmila.... Ain't you going to ask what curse is engulfing your father?" -Dashrath had that smile on face.
"Don't...."- Urmila gasped, with her barely whispered voice, as the piercing pain in throat started choking her again.
Dashrath announced in his king manner- "I know you won't ask... But I'll tell you. Because you need to know... The world needs to know... What a sinner Maharaj Dashrath is..."
"Swami please...."- Sumitra cried. But Dashrath didn't stop.
"Years ago... When I was young, energetic, passionate about myself and a newly made king. It was my favourite hobby to visit deeper forests and do hauntings. I was an expert in it. But I didn't know what that expertise was going to do...
That day... I was running behind a deer, arrow ready on my bow to shot. But I failed multiple times that day. Never in my life, i had failed thses many time in hitting a target. May be that was some sign from Gods... Which I ignored.
The deer ran... And I ran behind it, on my horse. Suddenly.... Suddenly it vanished somewhere in the bushes. In the silent enchanting forest, i could hear many sounds but it's thickness wasn't providing me a wide range of vision. So I did that, what I am best at..... 'Shabd bhedi baan'.... a technique to target the arrow in the direction of certain target just by following the sound generating through it.
I closed my eyes and stretched my bow. Gathered my attention and focused on the sounds reaching my ears only. I tried to differentiate, which sound could be generated by the deer only... And then I focused on the sound of a stream, the slossing sounds of water. I was. Sure, that the deer must be drinking water.
Without a second thought, I launched my arrow, supremely confident that it will hit the target anyway.
And it did... It hit, but not the deer. I heard a scream... A heart ripping scream.... But it wasn't the deer, it was a human. My hands trembled and shock made me baffled. I immediately ran in the direction of the scream.
I was right, it was a human... A young man, who was filling water in his pot. And he was... Shravan Kumar. I... I didn't have words to apologise. He was already on the door of death. While taking his last breath, he said only one thing... Please give this pot of water to my father and mother. And then... he left this world, on my lap.
I drowned in guilt and sorrow, clueless about my next action. But as per Shravan's last wish. I had to give water to his thirsty parents. I followed the direction he had pointed out, with that clay pot of water in hand. My heart was hammering inside my chest and eyes were constantly washing themselves with tears mixed with guilt.
Some distance later, I saw a balancing basket. There was one old couple sitting on the baskets. Both of them were blind. Shravan was carrying them on his own shoulders for pilgrimage. My footsteps glimmed their tired face and they misunderstood me as their son Shravan Kumar. I made them drink water and they thanked me. But I had no idea how to tell them this heart stabbing news. My tears were not ready to stop and they heard me sobbing. Immediately they realised that it's not their son... but somebody else.
I had no choice left except telling them that, I.. Maharaj Dashrath the King of Avadh... Killed your only son... your only support... your life force... your son Shravan. That too by 'mistake'.
Only I know... How the old couple weeped infront of me. At that time I wished, if I had never been born, this couple would have never go through this pain of hell for no reason.
That pain and anger is what made them curse me... That just like they lost their son in last stage of life, I'll loss my son too.... Just like they couldn't drink the water from his son's hand for the last time, i won't be able to do it too.... Just like they are getting a painful death in longing for their son, I get such death like this too...."
Dashrath cried loudly again- "This curse has burnt me for my entire life.... In my last moment as well.... Ram... Why did you go Ram...."
Urmila held her throat to control the pain, and shut her eyes to not let tears escaped it...
Sumitra had already broken into tears but Kaushlya was sitting like a breathing statue.
Dashrath glanced at all for the last time and touched Urmila's head affectionately. -"Bring my Ram to me... I want to see him for one last time. Just a glance of him... "
Urmila couldn't say a single word.
"Sumant... just once... I want to see him. A small glimpse of him... "- Sumant shed countless tears but had nothing to say.
"Just once.... I want to see him... Just once. Ram... Come to me, Ram... Let me see you for the last time. Only a glimpse of you... Ram....Ram my son.... My Ram... My Ram... My Ram.............."
Urmila remained stunned with paralyzed dry eyes. A sudden chill descended across entire palace. A collective gasp echoed through the corridors, with hearts freezing in disbelief. Tears streamed down faces, mingling with the icy air, as the weight of loss settled upon every soul. It was the end of an era, a poignant reminder of mortality. Ayodhya mourned deeply, grief weaving through the very fabric of the palace, as it was a time of farewell.... Because Maharaj Dashrath took his last breath.
_________
Character arts
I generated some ai art for the first time.
The princess of Mithila.✨
Sita in red, Mandvi in pink, Urmila in blue and Shrutkirti in yellow.
Rajkumari Sita... An expert in agriculture and medicine.
Rajkumari Mandvi... An expert painter and crafter
Rajkumari Urmila... An expert fighter with incredible knowledge of war and weapons
Rajkumari Shrutkirti... An expert in scriptures and philosophies.
These pictures look too modernised. 😼 I'll generate thses again. Also images of the princes of Ayodhya.