Billie POV:
A day later I'm sitting in the little hospital chair beside her bed reading when "mmmh" I shut my book and see the woman opening her eyes. She meets my gaze and asks "who are you?" My heart stops and tears prick my eyes. "M-my name is Billie. I'm y/n's wife" Dorothea furrows her brows and sits up against the pillows "why are you here?" The tears fall "you really don't remember me?" The woman stares before slowly shaking her head "I can remember some memories of you but they're all a bit fuzzy"
I bite my lip and nod "where is y/n?" My chest aches "....s-she" Dorothea grabs my hand then freezes "I'm sorry" she removes her hand and I immediately take it in mine "it's okay. Uhm she-didn't make it" I wipe my tears and take a deep breath. "Im sorry." I shake my head and look down. The next two days are spent getting to know each other. Dorothea told me she has no family here so I invited her to stay in my guest house. Just until she figures out her next move.
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"Billie why don't you tell her your wife's spirit is the reason she's alive or that she is your wife." Cordelia says. "Because wouldn't that freak you out?" Delia pops a grape into her mouth and shrugs "not really" I smile sadly "every-time I look at her I see y/n. She even does the little habits y/n would do. It's just hard to know she's still here but she's not mine." I sigh and there's a knock on the back door. "It's her." I run and open it "Theo! Hii" I say a little too excited. She smiles and plays with her fingers. A little habit y/n would do when she was nervous. I give a pained smile "hi Billie I um wanted to ask you if I can come in and hang out for a while. It's a little too quiet in the guest house. It's kinda freaking me out." I should have known, y/n hated when she was alone in quiet places for too long.
I smile and open the door wider "of course, come in" she steps in and waits for me. "Follow me, I have a friend of mine and y/n's over but don't worry she wouldn't mind." Theo nods and walks nervously behind me. Cordelia stands as she sees I returned with Theo. "Cordelia this is Dorothea, one of y/n's friends" Theo smiles and extends her hand out. The exact same one y/n would alway put out. Delia notices and gladly accepts it "it's nice to meet you. Please join us take your shoes off and get comfy" Theo smiles and takes a seat in the chair y/n used to always sit in. I can't help but gawk at the way she removes her shoes and tucks her legs underneath her. Cordelia sends me a mind message "stop staring" I clear my throat and look at Delia.
"So, Dorothea right?" Delia asks. I grab my wine glass and practically chug. "Yes, but you can call me Theo" she smiles "y/n had always said it was easier to scream than Dorothea" I giggle
Sounds like her.
"That sounds like something she would say." Delia chuckles. "So how well did you know y/n?" Delia asks. Theo thinks for a second "it's still a little fuzzy but I think we met during my first year at the hospital. I was assigned to work with a Dr. Howard" I feel a sharp pain in my chest. "I thought I was going to be working with some arrogant man but I was surprised when I saw a woman giving a diagnosis and ordering interns around. I was even more surprised when I found out she was actually nice." I laugh and look up at the pictures of us on my fireplace.
Theo sighs "she was one of the only people in that hospital I could rely on. I'd like to think she would say the same." I wipe a tear from my cheek.
You have no idea.
"Your last name is Michaels, right?" Theo nods. "Y/n would come home and tell me about her day. I remember she had came home one day and said 'if it weren't for Michaels being decent at her job I'd have lost all faith in the nursing program" Theo smiles and wipes her eyes. "It's funny I-this is gonna sound crazy and absolutely absurd but...I feel like I'm even closer to her now." Delia and I share a look.
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That week Theo had said she wanted to remember who she was so, I called my friend Ellie. I told her about the situation and asked her to find a way to bring y/n's memory back. If anyone can do it, it's her. If not, Cordelia already promised to wipe Theos memory clean.
"So Dorothea in our last session you spoke about having memories you don't remember. Can you explain?" Ellie says. Theo purses her lips "look it's weird and I don't understand it, but I have these urges or memories that I know aren't mine. I have a memory of getting married but I never did. I have never been that girl to want to get married. I remember wanting to have kids but I know the Dorothea before death never wanted that. I think it's the reason why my relationships always failed" Theo sighs.
"Can you remember who you were married to?" Ellie asks. "...no, it's just a memory of me in a white dress looking around at the venue. My spouse is blurry" Theo leans back in her chair. "I do remember having a serious ex-girlfriend though."
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Billie POV:
While y/n-Theo is having her session with Ellie there's a knock at the door "coming" I swing it open expecting it to be Cordelia but it's not. "Hi" there's a woman with long brunette hair, green eyes and a tall slim figure. "Hi? How can I help you?" I ask unsure of who this stranger is. "Um is Theo here? I'm Ella, her ex-girlfriend. I've been out of town for about a month for work and I came back as fast as I could after I heard about the incident. I'm her emergency contact, the hospital told me you checked her out" she shows me a picture of her and Theo smiling as her Lock Screen.
Fuck
"Oh uh yeah, come in" Ella enters and looks around. "Theo is in the middle of a therapy session but she should be done in a few minutes." Ella nods "okay thank you." I sit on the couch while Ella stands awkwardly "come, sit" Ella thanks me as she sits across from me on the couch. "So I'm afraid to ask but...how is she?" I force a smile "she's fine, she's having trouble remembering but she's alive and well." Ella releases a breath of relief "thank god. I was so worried. Since I got the call from the hospital I've been sick to my stomach. I got two weeks off work just so I can make sure she's okay." I give a sad smile and just then "Billie!" Theo calls out. "In here" she walks in the room fiddling with her fingers and freezes as she sees Ella.
"Hey" Ella stands and makes a beeline for Theo, who stands there a little shocked as she's engulfed in a hug. Theo wraps her arms around Ella and I feel my heart clench. Ellie walks out and sees the scene. She looks at me and I walk towards the kitchen. "I was just about to tell you" Ellie says as I search for my corkscrew. "Yeah I kinda figured it out on my own." I pop open the bottle and don't even bother grabbing a glass. "Billie" I place the bottle down and lick my lips "y/n is in there. Theo is just trying to figure things out, make sense of things. But this woman. She could be a major issue" I sigh and wipe the silent tears from my cheeks "hey billie?" Theo calls from the doorway. "Yeah?" I sniffle and turn to face her
Ella is standing behind her "I'll wait in the car." Theo nods and walks up to me. She cups my cheeks and wipes my tears "no crying, your too pretty to cry" I choke back a sob and nod. Theo smiles and says "I'm going out with Ella, I'll be back later okay?" I nod "okay." Ellie places a hand on my back and pulls me into her shoulder as Theo walks out "bye" as soon as I hear the door shut I break down. "Shhhh billie" I hide my face in her chest and wail "it's not fair!" Ellis rubs my back and strokes my hair. "It's not fair! Y/n's sprit saves Ellas girlfriend but where's my wife!"
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I ended up crying myself to sleep on Ellie's lap and woke up the next morning. I take a long hot, tearful shower and head downstairs after getting ready, trying to make myself appealing to y/n. As I enter the kitchen Theo is standing by the stove, she turns to place eggs on two plates and jumps "Jesus! Billie you scared me." I smile "sorry honey" Theo gives me a look, the same look y/n would give me every-time I would call her a pet name. Theo shakes her head and places the eggs on the plates. "There's coffee on the table I kinda guessed how you would like it. Also, I hope you don't mind I broke in here and made breakfast." I smile and shake my head "it's fine I don't mind"
I take a sip of the coffee and hum "just how I like it" Theo places a plate in front of me "really? I had a feeling" she smiles and places her plate before me, in y/n's chair. She takes a napkin and places it on her lap "have a habit of dropping food on yourself?" I ask. Theo nods "yes" I smile sadly "so did y/n" Theo looks down and takes a sip of her coffee. We eat in silence a few moments before I break it "how'd it go with Ella last night?" Theo smiles "pretty good. I haven't seen her in a while so we caught up and had dinner. Trying to you know fix the holes in my memory"
I nod "this is really good" I say referring to the food. "Thank you. I don't know why I decided to make breakfast I never really was much of a cook" I take a sip of my coffee and smile. Theo stops eating and looks up at me "Billie can I ask you something?" I swallow "sure." "How is it I remember little mundane things but I don't remember things about me and Ella, major things. In my head I remember wanting to have kids." "And Ella didn't?" I ask. "No said she did but this big memory break through Im having is wrong. She's gotta be right, she sounds right. I'm being the typical young lesbian dragging my heels." I cut her off "not all young lesbians are like that. My wife wasn't. I was always the one dragging my heels but y/n...she-she wanted everything your remembering. Which has to mean something right?" She furrows her brows and tilts her head "who to Ella?" I shake my head "no to you...it's none of my business but maybe you-you shouldn't listen to what everyone else says. You know who you are...and when you start believing that you'll get back to you."
"To what? Being like y/n committed, confident enough in the world to bring another human being into It? But you know, I never was so pretending like I was is just wishful thinking."
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